Re: sooo. . . .thatmikeguySeptember 7 2004, 08:15:25 UTC
yeah, that's unfortunately what no vacation meant. if I had gone, I would have been paying the price by having to deal with a backlog of problems for the rest of the project... just happened to end up on the worst week possible... of course. and of course no week is good for me, because I'm certainly trapped by my work ethic ;)
I completely agree... I know my cycle, and I expected it to follow me here. I expect it to follow me until I can make a clean break from working for other people. I am good at being a slacker when I am working for myself ;)
The hardest part is that I genuinely do love the sense of accomplishment and self-sacrifice. I'm not saying it's the most noble aspiration, but it's definitely something that makes me tick. Interestingly enough, I think sometimes it makes me tick more than "the depth of human relationships" ... which is something that makes me feel weird, but I'm capable of observing it in myself. It's definitely the reason why I have a tendency to put work first in my schedule. It's not that my relationships aren't incredibly important to me... they obviously are, but so is that weird worker mentality. I'll probably move beyond it at some point (at least I hope so) but at the moment it is still a driving force in me.
Everybody has their flaws... I consider that to be my primary one, at least the most visible. It's definitely hard to change though.
On the other hand... I am incredibly happy for YOU in your having found so many wonderful things... both in Japan, and with your husband :) Your new evolution is suiting you very well :D
Now, of course, I have no idea if you have your e-mail set up to receive replies, so you may not see this. I'm not used to this replying in my own journal thing anymore ;)
I completely agree... I know my cycle, and I expected it to follow me here. I expect it to follow me until I can make a clean break from working for other people. I am good at being a slacker when I am working for myself ;)
The hardest part is that I genuinely do love the sense of accomplishment and self-sacrifice. I'm not saying it's the most noble aspiration, but it's definitely something that makes me tick. Interestingly enough, I think sometimes it makes me tick more than "the depth of human relationships" ... which is something that makes me feel weird, but I'm capable of observing it in myself. It's definitely the reason why I have a tendency to put work first in my schedule. It's not that my relationships aren't incredibly important to me... they obviously are, but so is that weird worker mentality. I'll probably move beyond it at some point (at least I hope so) but at the moment it is still a driving force in me.
Everybody has their flaws... I consider that to be my primary one, at least the most visible. It's definitely hard to change though.
On the other hand... I am incredibly happy for YOU in your having found so many wonderful things... both in Japan, and with your husband :) Your new evolution is suiting you very well :D
Now, of course, I have no idea if you have your e-mail set up to receive replies, so you may not see this. I'm not used to this replying in my own journal thing anymore ;)
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