(no subject)
I've been thinking a lot lately. Maybe too much. Just some things I need to get off my mind.
I feel like a whore. I don't know what's wrong with me that nobody else seems to have a problem with. Making unconditional friends is hard. They either want sex, free smoke or someone to feel sorry for them or boost them up. I've only had one boyfriend. I've dated more guys than I can count. SO why don't they stick? What am I doing wrong? Do they only have one intention?
I didn't think I was THAT bad. I used to bitch and moan about how "oh no boys like me wa wa waa" but I'm really starting to get worried that something is wrong with me and nobody is telling me what it is. I'm awkward. I'm a hopeless romantic. I believe in passion. I don't believe in small talk.
I guess i'm just tired of being dumped....without ever being officially a girlfriend. I'm tired of being everybody's dirty little secret. I'm the girl who guys cheat with and hide from their parents or their friends for whatever reason. When is a guy going to be really excited about me? When is a guy going to be like "Wow I cant believe I'm dating this girl. I wanna tell everyone!"
Never it seems.
It's funny how you can feel like you know someone completely inside and out and in one week you can feel like you never knew them and you never want to know them. So disgusted and annoyed...
it happens to me more than it should...but this one....this one I wasn't expecting.
It makes me sad...
I hate not trusting anyone. Feeling like EVERYONE has an alterior motive.
At least I have Zack and Judy. My two very best friends here at kennesaw.
Things are going okay. Saw jarrett and anna and adam over the weekend. Julie almost killed me.
My room mates and I are finally past awkwardness and now we are actually pretty good friends. Ever since Jenn had her first sip of alcohol on her 21st birthday last week theres no stopping the partys here!!!!
"Aint no party like a Scranton party cause the Scranton party don't stop!"
I miss Meah A LOT. I miss and worry about my sister A LOT.
I want her to have a fairytale ending. Ben doesn't seem too much like a prince.
She needs a Jim. Not a Roy.
All of my best friends from the past 4 years are gone.
Its hard making new best friends.
It's hard having feelings for someone and realizing you are just another fling to them.
It's hard to have everything going great...and wondering why it doesn't feel that way.
I feel like a whore. I don't know what's wrong with me that nobody else seems to have a problem with. Making unconditional friends is hard. They either want sex, free smoke or someone to feel sorry for them or boost them up. I've only had one boyfriend. I've dated more guys than I can count. SO why don't they stick? What am I doing wrong? Do they only have one intention?
I didn't think I was THAT bad. I used to bitch and moan about how "oh no boys like me wa wa waa" but I'm really starting to get worried that something is wrong with me and nobody is telling me what it is. I'm awkward. I'm a hopeless romantic. I believe in passion. I don't believe in small talk.
I guess i'm just tired of being dumped....without ever being officially a girlfriend. I'm tired of being everybody's dirty little secret. I'm the girl who guys cheat with and hide from their parents or their friends for whatever reason. When is a guy going to be really excited about me? When is a guy going to be like "Wow I cant believe I'm dating this girl. I wanna tell everyone!"
Never it seems.
It's funny how you can feel like you know someone completely inside and out and in one week you can feel like you never knew them and you never want to know them. So disgusted and annoyed...
it happens to me more than it should...but this one....this one I wasn't expecting.
It makes me sad...
I hate not trusting anyone. Feeling like EVERYONE has an alterior motive.
At least I have Zack and Judy. My two very best friends here at kennesaw.
Things are going okay. Saw jarrett and anna and adam over the weekend. Julie almost killed me.
My room mates and I are finally past awkwardness and now we are actually pretty good friends. Ever since Jenn had her first sip of alcohol on her 21st birthday last week theres no stopping the partys here!!!!
"Aint no party like a Scranton party cause the Scranton party don't stop!"
I miss Meah A LOT. I miss and worry about my sister A LOT.
I want her to have a fairytale ending. Ben doesn't seem too much like a prince.
She needs a Jim. Not a Roy.
All of my best friends from the past 4 years are gone.
Its hard making new best friends.
It's hard having feelings for someone and realizing you are just another fling to them.
It's hard to have everything going great...and wondering why it doesn't feel that way.