return of the nightmare
it has been four years since i last saw him. i think i heard that he was made to see a psychiatrist and maybe do a little time, but probably not much. never mind that he threatened my life. and then, there he is on the street two weekends ago (and again this weekend)...walking past me as if we never knew each other...as if we had never been cooped up together in a small cabin in the middle of nowhere with no electricity, no phone, and what i would later think of as no safety. i recognize that the threat wasn't much more than words on a page...that he "most likely" would never act those horrible things out...that it was a cry for attention and help....but that isn't helping me sleep at night. he's made his way into my dreams again. a few nights ago he was just there in the background, kind of like he was this weekend as we walked past the chocolate shop, outside of which he sat talking to accordion woman. but last night, last night he made his presence known. he grabbed me and tried to hug or hold me, asking me wasn't i "glad to see him?" he's bigger now. i still think about how i can outrun him if i have to. i don't want to think these things.