death does not come soon enough

[thasecondcoming]

so many good times,
yet so many crimes,
so many things gone wrong in my life,
yet i continue through all of this strife,

so many ways,
to end it today,
im searching for purpose,
but scratching the surface,
it goes deeper it seems,
but its nothing to me,
there is no reason,
nothing to believe in,
im dying inside,
but trying to hide,
myself from my life,
myself from this strife.

when is it over when will it end,
how much farther can my sanity bend,
where is my breaking limit,
how will i kno to hit it.

so i press on,
regretting the dawn,
hating the day,
my life remains gray,
then night comes,
and i remain numb,
stuck in the middle,
questioning the riddle,
lifes mystery,
i cannot just let it be,
so this i will ponder,
until my days are no longer.

waiting for the darkness forever,
maybe then life will be better,
a complacent plane of exsistance to be,
teeming with no other souls but me.