The third of december
i have no right to feel jealousy against this girl
because i know that this is a part of her life.
and though only recently i became a part of it
i cant help feeling the way i do.
i try to tell myself to not get emotionally invested,
but it doesnt work.
i still cant help liking her.
there are reasons for that.
shes the first girl in a while who ive ever just chilled with.
shes the first girl in a while who i get tounge tied aroud.
shes the first girl in a while who is within my reach.
but shes not the first girl to make me question myself.
its the begining of the worst month of the year for me.
i know the bitnerness that grows out of affection and christmas joy too well.
and i dont want to have to experience it again.
but if i avoid it, than what kind of life will i be living.
i dont want to run away or hold back
because things seem dismal.
but i dont want to brood and be selfish
not during the season of giving.
meybe i lied and i am expecting something from her,
or meybe im just expecting too much of myself.
meybe its the hopes that i had of her before,
or meybe im getting caught up with my rediculous obsession with love.
in my dream world of romanticism i am the "pennyless writer."
and shes the much saught after cortesan
i somehow show her a world she never knew she could be a part of
and we our love lasts forever.
a little much i know, but in reality, i am the bboy living paycheck to paycheck
and shes the much saught after fashion merchandising major.
i somehow releive her of the burdens that only i can clearly see,
and she and i share times that will never be forgotten.
i realize i cant persue her with expectations.
and i cant set my hopes too high.
but with a little bit of work, and a little bit of luck.
that meybe something nice can happen.
because i know that this is a part of her life.
and though only recently i became a part of it
i cant help feeling the way i do.
i try to tell myself to not get emotionally invested,
but it doesnt work.
i still cant help liking her.
there are reasons for that.
shes the first girl in a while who ive ever just chilled with.
shes the first girl in a while who i get tounge tied aroud.
shes the first girl in a while who is within my reach.
but shes not the first girl to make me question myself.
its the begining of the worst month of the year for me.
i know the bitnerness that grows out of affection and christmas joy too well.
and i dont want to have to experience it again.
but if i avoid it, than what kind of life will i be living.
i dont want to run away or hold back
because things seem dismal.
but i dont want to brood and be selfish
not during the season of giving.
meybe i lied and i am expecting something from her,
or meybe im just expecting too much of myself.
meybe its the hopes that i had of her before,
or meybe im getting caught up with my rediculous obsession with love.
in my dream world of romanticism i am the "pennyless writer."
and shes the much saught after cortesan
i somehow show her a world she never knew she could be a part of
and we our love lasts forever.
a little much i know, but in reality, i am the bboy living paycheck to paycheck
and shes the much saught after fashion merchandising major.
i somehow releive her of the burdens that only i can clearly see,
and she and i share times that will never be forgotten.
i realize i cant persue her with expectations.
and i cant set my hopes too high.
but with a little bit of work, and a little bit of luck.
that meybe something nice can happen.