I really like the raisin analogy, though based on an experience I had, I'd add something to my own version. Once, I found a little shriveled something in my drawer (I was about ten, I think). Investigation of the "eww, I don't want to touch that, but I don't want whatever it is touching my underwear" variety proved it to be a raisin in the making; i.e a lone grape that was mostly shriveled, probably walked in from the kitchen when I had a snack some earlier date. Now, I've always loved grapes, all plump and juicy and fun to eat. And before this event, I didn't really like raisins, but could tolerate them. Not anymore. So maybe raisins in fandom for me are things that used to be yummy, juicy grapes, but have inexplicably shriveled into weird little lumps that might be bugs.
It's reassuring to read that you have those "why do people like me" moments. Among other reasons, I love the depth you bring to fandom. Heck, even your "boys pretty" type posts feel meaningful.
Besides that, like my favorite grapes, you (at least the online you I know) are juicy and delicious --if somewhat less plump;)
I'm going to be thinking about what you said, about finding that shrivelled once-was-a-grape; to me it's probably going to work as a metaphor for the imagined possibility of something that never comes to fruition, something that rots on (or off) the vine. But then that sounds too bitter, and I'm really aiming for simply closing the door on all the crusty raisins.
Anyway, my brain-burps aside, I must thank you for all your thoughts, including your final ones. I do love how those grapes sometimes end up as wine-ish communication, all flavorful and intoxicating, and not as little raisiny turds. (Yes, I'm going to beat this metaphor to death--why do you ask? Heh.)
It's reassuring to read that you have those "why do people like me" moments. Among other reasons, I love the depth you bring to fandom. Heck, even your "boys pretty" type posts feel meaningful.
Besides that, like my favorite grapes, you (at least the online you I know) are juicy and delicious --if somewhat less plump;)
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Anyway, my brain-burps aside, I must thank you for all your thoughts, including your final ones. I do love how those grapes sometimes end up as wine-ish communication, all flavorful and intoxicating, and not as little raisiny turds. (Yes, I'm going to beat this metaphor to death--why do you ask? Heh.)
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