(no subject)
Let's go down to the water's edge, and we can cast away those doubts. Some things are better left unsaid, but they still turn me inside-out...
It was warm and cloudy, the sun periodically peeking out from behind the clouds. A seagull flew high above me, calling out. It reminded me of Vancouver. It's been exactly a year since I was there last. Too long. It really is where I need to be. It's home.
As I approach the end of high school, I'm taking a harder look at the people around me. Why am I spending time with them? Do I really care about them at all? As it stands right now, there are a total of 3, MAYBE four or five people in my immediate circle of friends who I want to stay in touch with after graduation. How many friends do you have? Can you imagine only staying in touch with 3 of them after high school?
I walk through the halls of my school and I feel like I'm invisible. Everyone's thinking about only themselves these days. What they're going to do with their lives, where they're going to go, what they're going to see. Only one of the few people who really matter to me (a total of maybe 5 friends) goes to my school. It's this person who keeps me sane at the lunch table, who gives me a reason to go there every day.
I'm in a weird place right now. Things are going really well with my sunset boy, but amidst all the happiness there's a lingering question of the future.
Kalea is looking at maybe going to the University of Helsinki in Finland. They're socialist, so post-secondary education is free. She whispered: "Thai, come with me!" And I couldn't think of a reason to say no. If I were to go, it would either be next spring, or september 2006. I told Adam this and he got all worried. He said he didn't want to lose me, but I thought to myself, where are we going to be a year from now?
The Raccoon is really disappointed with me these days. Granted, I haven't been being the best friend in the world... but you know how it is when you have a new relationship: You want to spend all your time with that one person. I've been neglecting my friends. I know this, but I have to concentrate on my boyfriend right now. And they should know that.
Everything's really up in the air. I don't know what's going to happen. I might be going to Cold Lake for the summer, with writing camp in the middle. Who knows?
I've been writing. Spring break and everything that happened in that week really brought it on. It's a nice feeling, mixed up with all the other feelings that have been making themselves visible these last few weeks.
I feel like there needs to be a proper way to end this entry. With a simple request: Let me paint you black and call you my shadow. (Run with me? There's nothing left...)
It was warm and cloudy, the sun periodically peeking out from behind the clouds. A seagull flew high above me, calling out. It reminded me of Vancouver. It's been exactly a year since I was there last. Too long. It really is where I need to be. It's home.
As I approach the end of high school, I'm taking a harder look at the people around me. Why am I spending time with them? Do I really care about them at all? As it stands right now, there are a total of 3, MAYBE four or five people in my immediate circle of friends who I want to stay in touch with after graduation. How many friends do you have? Can you imagine only staying in touch with 3 of them after high school?
I walk through the halls of my school and I feel like I'm invisible. Everyone's thinking about only themselves these days. What they're going to do with their lives, where they're going to go, what they're going to see. Only one of the few people who really matter to me (a total of maybe 5 friends) goes to my school. It's this person who keeps me sane at the lunch table, who gives me a reason to go there every day.
I'm in a weird place right now. Things are going really well with my sunset boy, but amidst all the happiness there's a lingering question of the future.
Kalea is looking at maybe going to the University of Helsinki in Finland. They're socialist, so post-secondary education is free. She whispered: "Thai, come with me!" And I couldn't think of a reason to say no. If I were to go, it would either be next spring, or september 2006. I told Adam this and he got all worried. He said he didn't want to lose me, but I thought to myself, where are we going to be a year from now?
The Raccoon is really disappointed with me these days. Granted, I haven't been being the best friend in the world... but you know how it is when you have a new relationship: You want to spend all your time with that one person. I've been neglecting my friends. I know this, but I have to concentrate on my boyfriend right now. And they should know that.
Everything's really up in the air. I don't know what's going to happen. I might be going to Cold Lake for the summer, with writing camp in the middle. Who knows?
I've been writing. Spring break and everything that happened in that week really brought it on. It's a nice feeling, mixed up with all the other feelings that have been making themselves visible these last few weeks.
I feel like there needs to be a proper way to end this entry. With a simple request: Let me paint you black and call you my shadow. (Run with me? There's nothing left...)