So fat

[thabmg60]

I really hate taking pictures of me. All the recent pictures of me have one thing in common. My fat covers my fat. Holy shit, I look terrible I mean I am one fat bastard. I don't like looking at my photos I am so embaressed by them. I really need to get off my ass and lose some damn weight. Now I know why no girl wants to be with me. Hell taking one look at my photos and I was disgusted. I need to stop eating and actually work out. I don't want to have a heart attack like my boss or have diabetes later on in life. I am not saying I want to be super crack head thin but at least lose twenty odd pounds this summer you know. It sucks because I do see why no girl wants to date me. I am just the fat guy friend, or fat asshole to some girls. And I think of what Dawn told me. That I look cute like a teddy bear. Yeah cuz I am fat and fluffy like a bear. But I don't want to look like that at all. I want a girl to actually think I look good. Have her say, Mmm Gerry, now that is a hottie. I want girls to notice me for once. Not just see me as some hideous, disgusting, revolting, ugly, huge, gargantuan sack of shit that resemble as human. And thinking like this just upsets me more. I think I will just end up alone. No girl wants to be with me, I see now why. I can't even think of one girl who has shown any interest in me a long time. Not a single girl that I know has looked at me with admiration or companionship. Sigh, god this so fucking blows feeling like this.

Seriously, which girl has liked me eh? Not a single one.............not even the one I want to be with right. I guess I really am a lost cause.