Ex Best Friends
My Best Friend Ron. what can I say about him.
He's the one responsible for introducing me to weed. not really. but he is the one responsible for getting me addicted. and re-addicted to cigarettes. I quit smoking last year for about 2 months. I hung out with him once and wham bam thank you ma'am right back on the stuff. I've since decided I need to quit. No more Cigarettes (day one of cold turkey is today). I'm not sure if I will ever really quit smoking weed, I'm definately quitting hooking up. and I'm also definately cutting back by a LOT. I need to get my life on track, and I haven't been able to do that since I started hanging out with Ron.
There's a bunch of drama floating around about him. that I was sick of dealing with last year. it's a year later and I'm still being forced to deal with it.
All of this started when Ron met some girl off of the internet. a little young, just turning 18 a little after they dated. I believe she's now 19. Ron Proposed to her after about a year of knowing her. and they've now pushed back the wedding date a few times. He asked me to be his best man, as well as another friend of his, Steve-o. 2 best mans? I've known this guy since elementary school, and been good friends with him since high school. well over 10 years of knowing each other. and at least 7 or 8 of being friends. I know most of his family, I was at his Grandfather's funeral for him. many in his family have told me that they love me like a brother to Ron. they tell me they love me for telling Ron Straight up how things are without holding back.
then Tannia came around. until this point I avoided using her name, but as I simply don't care any more. I'm going to put it all out there.
Tannia swooped in and according to Ron is the most beautiful girl he's ever been with. I kind of disagree. she looks young and cute; if you like a curved back, pigeon-toed midget . She's a spoiled brat. but so is he, being an only child. the scary thing is that she isn't an only child, but definitely acts like one when she doesn't get whatever she wants. and right now she wants me out of Ron's life.
I've given up, it's not worth stressing over. I told her life is too short to hold a grudge, and she told me off for "trying to mend fences" I told her I wasn't trying to mend fences, I was just trying to see if she had matured at all. and I was. and she hasn't.
The whole fiasco spawns from me feeling that they are both too young and too immature ... not ready... to get married. which is the truth, they've put it off like 5 times now. and judging from Ron's Family's track record with marriage, I'd say Ron really needs to wait as long as possible before jumping into something he'll regret. as he does tend to jump to conclusions.
hell I remember pointing out a girl at a party that I thought was cute and was trying to work up the nerve to talk to, maybe get him to be my wing-man sort of thing. the next day they were dating. >_< that lasted for about 2 weeks and I was really fucking pissed off at him. but friends don't cock-block friends like that. anyhow we both got into it over that, and he ditched her and she turned into a typical crazy girl.
we're guys, we got over it. and I am. it's unimportant in the long run.
some years later he met another girl online, the girl happened to be my on-again off-again girlfriend's Cousin. we went out there and met them. and the girl I used to date and I got back together. his girl was way out of his league. maybe they fooled around a little I don't know. but it didn't work out in the end. things were going great for me though... then one day as this girl was also crazy decided I was cheating on her or unfaithful... (she had issues okay, she would get pissed at me if another girl walked across my path.... she would literally hit me for it). I am not unfaithful, if I like someone else I'll say so. I'm not going to keep that buried. I've been hurt like that too many times. anyhow that relationship crumbled.
and Ron and I were best friends all over again. doing everything together, getting stoned every day, many times a day. going on adventures to hollywood and many other places. it was probably the best time of my life. but I should have been building social skills rather than smoking pot with one of my friends.
anyhow years go by like this, and then Tannia. she's young, naive, immature, but claims maturity more than most other girls her age.
Maybe she is more mature, but doesn't that claim in itself kind of prove that she's not? some one that was mature would know it and not have to state it to prove it.
She got a stuffed Unicorn. or had one. aww cute right? sure why not. well she buys it clothes. and dresses it up to look like Ron. uh... they call it huggleberry, and always leave messages on eachother's myspace and friendster about how they miss their huggleberry (eachother) whatever I get it. but it's still a LITTLE immature to be 19, buying stuffed animals, buying clothes for said stuffed animals, and dressing them up and naming them... I mean that's something I can understand in elementary school, hell even middle school. but that habit I'd say would die by around 18... right? and girls are more mature than guys... so i dunno. I'm not talking she buys like a little shirt, I mean like a shirt, underwear, socks, shoes, glasses, sweaters....
or maybe it's a girl thing and I'm just retarded when it comes to girls. I don't know. but Tannia clearly has issues. I'm fairly certain she was abused by her father as a child. she has nothing positive to say about him. Ron has never met any of her family.
I mean She is cooped up in his room all day every day as she doesn't have any friends out here... (yes I forgot to mention she moved into his room with him.. his room in his mother's apartment). I think recently I got them talking about moving out, as it'd be better for both of them having space apart from eachother. but he can't move out because he's his mothers care taker (she's legally handicapped, helper dog and all). he's also the manager of the apartments that his mother inherited from his grandfather when he died. by manager I mean he's the one that deals with the facilities light bulbs fixtures etc.
If Ron isn't there His mother doesn't collect the disability check he's supposed to be getting for caring for her. that's complicated, and none of my business though, but I don't think he can move out even if he wanted to. so Tannia is cooped up in a room I'd say is roughtly 12 x 12, give or take a few feet. His room is a mess, he never cleans it. she never cleans it. his bong sits right by his bed along with a plethora of green medicine containers and glass pipes. he has his medical card for medical marijuana, and buys an eighth what seems like every couple of days to me.
So he's a stoner. a die hard, live for pot stoner.
he doesn't do anything without being stoned anymore.
He smokes in the morning, on his lunch break, after work, and many times after that with co-workers and friends of Tannia. Oh that's right, I was pretty much his last friend from the pre-Tannia years. all of the friends he has now seem to be post-tannia approved. and many of them put their hands all over her. right in front of him Tannia doesn't smoke pot, or cigarettes, and has sworn since the day she met him that she would get him to quit.
the thing that upsets me is that he's letting this girl come in, change him, and is totally clueless to it.
I've never told him but when they had started dating she sent me a few risque pictures of her showing off her body (I wasn't all that impressed). but I've never told him. I still have them as proof, nothing more... they weren't THAT risque, but I know it'd piss him off knowing I've seen that. and he wouldn't believe me if I couldn't send them to him. on the off chance he actually reads this I'll gladly fork em over. I'm not really attracted to her. besides she's always falling out of her clothes, all of his friends have seen her tits. not a big deal. and not really impressive or anything either, not really worth mentioning.
One time he went to a strip club after smoking with me. he liked to try and drag me to the club. but I don't get it. spend money to see/feel something I can't actually have, and go home to nothing? it's just torture for me. the last time I went the girl ended up sucking around $100 out of my wallet... and all she did was talk rather than dance. I felt so cheap and so used afterwards. like I'm not your fucking shrink. I like hearing about your life, I like feeling like a beautiful girl likes me and cares enough to share her life about me, but if you're going to charge me a fee for doing something and then you do the opposite and still charge me anyways? well it makes me feel cheap, and used. at least if I was getting a dance I would know I was cheap :-D.
anyhow, he wanted me to go with him again. and I didn't want to, I had work, I find the place to be kind of a waste of money. He told me he checked it out with Tannia, (I guess they had a fight) but he told me he mentioned it and she was okay with it. so he went, I stayed home told him to be safe as always.
a few days later I get a lovely phonecall AT WORK from his Fiance telling me if I ever let him do that again she would "end us both" or kill us I guess. yes an open threat. I hung up on her and told Ron off. How dare she call me for something that you fucked up on. I explained to her that I was not and never will be Ron's Keeper... ever since that her and I have been on the rocks.
I guess she realized I don't care if he's with her or not. and in the grand scheme of things I don't see them going the long haul.
which if she was a normal respectable person she would accept and move on. I'm not worth her trouble. instead she went plodding through months and year old blogs that I wrote about how I think she's too immature to marry Ron. and how I think he's not ready yet either. She went ballistic (only proving the point further). and forbade Ron from hanging out with me around her.
I haven't seen Ron since I guess around last October/November. It's crazy really. we went from spending every day together, to maybe one day a week... to one day a month to not ever again so fast. if my friendship really meant anything to him, he would have told her to fuck off a long time ago. that she doesn't get to pick and choose who his friends are.
a part of me is still waiting for him to grow the balls to do that. but it looks less promising by the day. he explained to me that in a relationship (because fuck if I didn't know this already!) that the girl is always right, even when she's wrong.
I get what he's trying to say, but NO one has the right to dictate who your friends are or are not. He's not married to her. and they already act like they are. that's the frightening thing. I knew with how serious he claimed they were, that I wouldn't get to hang out as much as we used to. but that's still no excuse for what's happened.
Last night was the end. like I said I IM'd her(Tannia) to see if she had matured at all. she hadn't. so I blocked her again. she texted me telling me how she's his one true love and he will always do whatever she wants and some other bullshit. I didn't get the text till this morning. but I thought about that for all of a half second. Ron would sooner marry Pot before he'd marry her. Ron's one and only true love is Weed. she won't be able to get him to quit. and if he ever actually does he'll probably have a clear enough mind to realize what a bitch She is.
so in the mean time I can smile and laugh that she thinks she's won some battle ( I didn't know there was one) for Ron's Heart.
but all a long his one and only has always been pot. and she's tricked herself into thinking that it's her and not the weed. hahahahaha. they think I'm jealous of her, they think I'm jealous of their relationship. that's not the case AT ALL. I'm upset that I'm loosing my best friend, over a conceited, psychotic, messed up girl. How trivial.
::my apologies for making this so damn long, we had an even longer history::
He's the one responsible for introducing me to weed. not really. but he is the one responsible for getting me addicted. and re-addicted to cigarettes. I quit smoking last year for about 2 months. I hung out with him once and wham bam thank you ma'am right back on the stuff. I've since decided I need to quit. No more Cigarettes (day one of cold turkey is today). I'm not sure if I will ever really quit smoking weed, I'm definately quitting hooking up. and I'm also definately cutting back by a LOT. I need to get my life on track, and I haven't been able to do that since I started hanging out with Ron.
There's a bunch of drama floating around about him. that I was sick of dealing with last year. it's a year later and I'm still being forced to deal with it.
All of this started when Ron met some girl off of the internet. a little young, just turning 18 a little after they dated. I believe she's now 19. Ron Proposed to her after about a year of knowing her. and they've now pushed back the wedding date a few times. He asked me to be his best man, as well as another friend of his, Steve-o. 2 best mans? I've known this guy since elementary school, and been good friends with him since high school. well over 10 years of knowing each other. and at least 7 or 8 of being friends. I know most of his family, I was at his Grandfather's funeral for him. many in his family have told me that they love me like a brother to Ron. they tell me they love me for telling Ron Straight up how things are without holding back.
then Tannia came around. until this point I avoided using her name, but as I simply don't care any more. I'm going to put it all out there.
Tannia swooped in and according to Ron is the most beautiful girl he's ever been with. I kind of disagree. she looks young and cute; if you like a curved back, pigeon-toed midget . She's a spoiled brat. but so is he, being an only child. the scary thing is that she isn't an only child, but definitely acts like one when she doesn't get whatever she wants. and right now she wants me out of Ron's life.
I've given up, it's not worth stressing over. I told her life is too short to hold a grudge, and she told me off for "trying to mend fences" I told her I wasn't trying to mend fences, I was just trying to see if she had matured at all. and I was. and she hasn't.
The whole fiasco spawns from me feeling that they are both too young and too immature ... not ready... to get married. which is the truth, they've put it off like 5 times now. and judging from Ron's Family's track record with marriage, I'd say Ron really needs to wait as long as possible before jumping into something he'll regret. as he does tend to jump to conclusions.
hell I remember pointing out a girl at a party that I thought was cute and was trying to work up the nerve to talk to, maybe get him to be my wing-man sort of thing. the next day they were dating. >_< that lasted for about 2 weeks and I was really fucking pissed off at him. but friends don't cock-block friends like that. anyhow we both got into it over that, and he ditched her and she turned into a typical crazy girl.
we're guys, we got over it. and I am. it's unimportant in the long run.
some years later he met another girl online, the girl happened to be my on-again off-again girlfriend's Cousin. we went out there and met them. and the girl I used to date and I got back together. his girl was way out of his league. maybe they fooled around a little I don't know. but it didn't work out in the end. things were going great for me though... then one day as this girl was also crazy decided I was cheating on her or unfaithful... (she had issues okay, she would get pissed at me if another girl walked across my path.... she would literally hit me for it). I am not unfaithful, if I like someone else I'll say so. I'm not going to keep that buried. I've been hurt like that too many times. anyhow that relationship crumbled.
and Ron and I were best friends all over again. doing everything together, getting stoned every day, many times a day. going on adventures to hollywood and many other places. it was probably the best time of my life. but I should have been building social skills rather than smoking pot with one of my friends.
anyhow years go by like this, and then Tannia. she's young, naive, immature, but claims maturity more than most other girls her age.
Maybe she is more mature, but doesn't that claim in itself kind of prove that she's not? some one that was mature would know it and not have to state it to prove it.
She got a stuffed Unicorn. or had one. aww cute right? sure why not. well she buys it clothes. and dresses it up to look like Ron. uh... they call it huggleberry, and always leave messages on eachother's myspace and friendster about how they miss their huggleberry (eachother) whatever I get it. but it's still a LITTLE immature to be 19, buying stuffed animals, buying clothes for said stuffed animals, and dressing them up and naming them... I mean that's something I can understand in elementary school, hell even middle school. but that habit I'd say would die by around 18... right? and girls are more mature than guys... so i dunno. I'm not talking she buys like a little shirt, I mean like a shirt, underwear, socks, shoes, glasses, sweaters....
or maybe it's a girl thing and I'm just retarded when it comes to girls. I don't know. but Tannia clearly has issues. I'm fairly certain she was abused by her father as a child. she has nothing positive to say about him. Ron has never met any of her family.
I mean She is cooped up in his room all day every day as she doesn't have any friends out here... (yes I forgot to mention she moved into his room with him.. his room in his mother's apartment). I think recently I got them talking about moving out, as it'd be better for both of them having space apart from eachother. but he can't move out because he's his mothers care taker (she's legally handicapped, helper dog and all). he's also the manager of the apartments that his mother inherited from his grandfather when he died. by manager I mean he's the one that deals with the facilities light bulbs fixtures etc.
If Ron isn't there His mother doesn't collect the disability check he's supposed to be getting for caring for her. that's complicated, and none of my business though, but I don't think he can move out even if he wanted to. so Tannia is cooped up in a room I'd say is roughtly 12 x 12, give or take a few feet. His room is a mess, he never cleans it. she never cleans it. his bong sits right by his bed along with a plethora of green medicine containers and glass pipes. he has his medical card for medical marijuana, and buys an eighth what seems like every couple of days to me.
So he's a stoner. a die hard, live for pot stoner.
he doesn't do anything without being stoned anymore.
He smokes in the morning, on his lunch break, after work, and many times after that with co-workers and friends of Tannia. Oh that's right, I was pretty much his last friend from the pre-Tannia years. all of the friends he has now seem to be post-tannia approved. and many of them put their hands all over her. right in front of him Tannia doesn't smoke pot, or cigarettes, and has sworn since the day she met him that she would get him to quit.
the thing that upsets me is that he's letting this girl come in, change him, and is totally clueless to it.
I've never told him but when they had started dating she sent me a few risque pictures of her showing off her body (I wasn't all that impressed). but I've never told him. I still have them as proof, nothing more... they weren't THAT risque, but I know it'd piss him off knowing I've seen that. and he wouldn't believe me if I couldn't send them to him. on the off chance he actually reads this I'll gladly fork em over. I'm not really attracted to her. besides she's always falling out of her clothes, all of his friends have seen her tits. not a big deal. and not really impressive or anything either, not really worth mentioning.
One time he went to a strip club after smoking with me. he liked to try and drag me to the club. but I don't get it. spend money to see/feel something I can't actually have, and go home to nothing? it's just torture for me. the last time I went the girl ended up sucking around $100 out of my wallet... and all she did was talk rather than dance. I felt so cheap and so used afterwards. like I'm not your fucking shrink. I like hearing about your life, I like feeling like a beautiful girl likes me and cares enough to share her life about me, but if you're going to charge me a fee for doing something and then you do the opposite and still charge me anyways? well it makes me feel cheap, and used. at least if I was getting a dance I would know I was cheap :-D.
anyhow, he wanted me to go with him again. and I didn't want to, I had work, I find the place to be kind of a waste of money. He told me he checked it out with Tannia, (I guess they had a fight) but he told me he mentioned it and she was okay with it. so he went, I stayed home told him to be safe as always.
a few days later I get a lovely phonecall AT WORK from his Fiance telling me if I ever let him do that again she would "end us both" or kill us I guess. yes an open threat. I hung up on her and told Ron off. How dare she call me for something that you fucked up on. I explained to her that I was not and never will be Ron's Keeper... ever since that her and I have been on the rocks.
I guess she realized I don't care if he's with her or not. and in the grand scheme of things I don't see them going the long haul.
which if she was a normal respectable person she would accept and move on. I'm not worth her trouble. instead she went plodding through months and year old blogs that I wrote about how I think she's too immature to marry Ron. and how I think he's not ready yet either. She went ballistic (only proving the point further). and forbade Ron from hanging out with me around her.
I haven't seen Ron since I guess around last October/November. It's crazy really. we went from spending every day together, to maybe one day a week... to one day a month to not ever again so fast. if my friendship really meant anything to him, he would have told her to fuck off a long time ago. that she doesn't get to pick and choose who his friends are.
a part of me is still waiting for him to grow the balls to do that. but it looks less promising by the day. he explained to me that in a relationship (because fuck if I didn't know this already!) that the girl is always right, even when she's wrong.
I get what he's trying to say, but NO one has the right to dictate who your friends are or are not. He's not married to her. and they already act like they are. that's the frightening thing. I knew with how serious he claimed they were, that I wouldn't get to hang out as much as we used to. but that's still no excuse for what's happened.
Last night was the end. like I said I IM'd her(Tannia) to see if she had matured at all. she hadn't. so I blocked her again. she texted me telling me how she's his one true love and he will always do whatever she wants and some other bullshit. I didn't get the text till this morning. but I thought about that for all of a half second. Ron would sooner marry Pot before he'd marry her. Ron's one and only true love is Weed. she won't be able to get him to quit. and if he ever actually does he'll probably have a clear enough mind to realize what a bitch She is.
so in the mean time I can smile and laugh that she thinks she's won some battle ( I didn't know there was one) for Ron's Heart.
but all a long his one and only has always been pot. and she's tricked herself into thinking that it's her and not the weed. hahahahaha. they think I'm jealous of her, they think I'm jealous of their relationship. that's not the case AT ALL. I'm upset that I'm loosing my best friend, over a conceited, psychotic, messed up girl. How trivial.
::my apologies for making this so damn long, we had an even longer history::