who are you to tell me that i'll always be this way?
i am the most paranoid person on the planet. it's not NORMAL to be as paranoid as i am. and jealous too.
i always feel like people don't like me. that they're only nice to me because they feel bad. like they don't wanna be mean to anyone so they're nice to me. like everyone has that relationship where you don't really like the person, but they think you like them because you don't wanna be mean to them. for some reason since i have a relationship like that, i feel like im that person for EVERYBODY. it's weird. and like people assure me that it's not like that...that everybody likes me and really LIKES me isn't just pretending to like me...but...idk...i always feel like even those people are just saying that to make me feel better. i think it's because everybody in this world talks about at least ONE person behind their back and i always think when someone talks about someone else behind their back "what is this person saying about ME behind MY back?!" it's a stupid paranoia. so if i get on your nerves or you don't want to be my friend, please let me know cuz i can't take the wondering.
and i know not a single person who reads this is going to say to me "i don't want to be your friend" i know you all too well.
<3 Mary