(no subject)
ugh... anxiety kicking in so hard right now, i feel like puking... I feel so young and alone, like a child lost in a grocery store. All the wall growing taller and taller, and everyone rushing past you knowing exactly what they want and getting it. I always leave myself scrambling to do things right, and get things done. I leave myself no time, and no back ups. I've always been so independent, but when I need support i leave myself with nothing, or noone to catch my slipping hand.
School is starting next week and tomorrow I go with Killa and Nathan to MCC and get my crap straightend out.
The people around me either have found someone to date or be with, I feel kind of left out in all the happy coupleing. But the thing is there are a couple people I could let myself get emotionally attached to but deep inside i just dont want to be in a serious relationship right now, yes it would give me temporary happyness and some emotional stability. But I just dont care enough... Any relationship i jump into right now would be meaningless and just take up time like a TV show. Another waste of my time when I could be doing so much more.
Today I watched some shakira videos and danced to "Objection tango" I am so excited to learn tango it's heating my blood as I think about it. I'm gonna watch and listen to somemore of that to get this emo feeling out of my stomach
School is starting next week and tomorrow I go with Killa and Nathan to MCC and get my crap straightend out.
The people around me either have found someone to date or be with, I feel kind of left out in all the happy coupleing. But the thing is there are a couple people I could let myself get emotionally attached to but deep inside i just dont want to be in a serious relationship right now, yes it would give me temporary happyness and some emotional stability. But I just dont care enough... Any relationship i jump into right now would be meaningless and just take up time like a TV show. Another waste of my time when I could be doing so much more.
Today I watched some shakira videos and danced to "Objection tango" I am so excited to learn tango it's heating my blood as I think about it. I'm gonna watch and listen to somemore of that to get this emo feeling out of my stomach