Prompt 4
“Oh this is fragging ridiculous,” Barricade said, dropping his aft hard on a toy car’s roof. The car squeaked.
“Oh, you think so?” Barricade retorted. He leaned, casually, back against the spine of a book, arms folding over his chassis.
“Both of you, shut up.” Barricade snapped, his doorwings snapping down against the hood pressed against his back kibble. “Don’t need the static of your torquing each other.”
“Wait. Wait. This is NOT working.” Barricade pointed at the grey and blue model. “YOU are now ‘Recon.’ You? are Deluxe.”
“And who does that make you?” Recon argued, jutting one plastic talon at the speaker.
“It makes me Barricade.”
“SLAG THAT!” Deluxe yelled. “You don’t get to be ‘Barricade’ while the others of us have stupid branding nicknames!”
“Fine,” Barricade harrumphed. “I’m ‘Allspark Enhanced'. You can just call me…Enhanced.” He leaned back, smug.
“Allspark Enhanced to do what? Be obnoxious?” Recon sneered.
“Least I’m not tacky. What the frag you recon with those colors, you? A mall?”
“You shut up.” Recon pouted, his hands moving surreptitiously to cover the ‘security’ insignia on his upper arm panels. “It’s called redeco. You have it, too.”
“Yeah, but mine’s better. I was a Target exclusive.” Enhanced twisted his torso, showing off his blue coloring. “Sexy.”
“Sexy, my crankshaft,” Deluxe said. “I’m the oldest, therefore, I’m the best.”
“Right.”
“You’re both just lame repaints of me!”
“Repaint means improvement,” Recon huffed. “It means they were boring the first time around.”
“BORING? I am NOT boring!” Deluxe howled.
“Your colors are boring,” Enhanced agreed. “Frag, even your Frenzy is lame.”
Deluxe spluttered. “What is wrong with my Frenzy?! He’s exactly the same as yours!”
“Yours is grey. And boring.” Recon popped open his grille. “See? Mine’s blue.”
“Your face is blue!” Deluxe snarled.
“Uhhh, yeah? So’s Enhanced's.”
Deluxe balled his plastic fists. “You suck. Both of you.”
“My Frenzy’s red,” Enhanced boasted. “Much higher visibility. Better.”
“Thus feeding the fire of FIBRIR/FIRRIB debate,” Deluxe said, sarcastically. “Truly, you two are the pinnacle of evil.”
“You know what?” Another voice cut in, from the shelf above. “You three should shut the frag up.”
“Or else what, Interrogator-butt? You gonna give us purple nurples with your ‘probe arms’?” He made air quotes. The other two snickered. “Come on down here and try that.”
“You forget,” Interrogator said, smugly. “I’ve got Disc-Blast Frenzy up here. He may be grey and Primus knows he's annoying, but he’s got projectiles.”
“Oh, you think so?” Barricade retorted. He leaned, casually, back against the spine of a book, arms folding over his chassis.
“Both of you, shut up.” Barricade snapped, his doorwings snapping down against the hood pressed against his back kibble. “Don’t need the static of your torquing each other.”
“Wait. Wait. This is NOT working.” Barricade pointed at the grey and blue model. “YOU are now ‘Recon.’ You? are Deluxe.”
“And who does that make you?” Recon argued, jutting one plastic talon at the speaker.
“It makes me Barricade.”
“SLAG THAT!” Deluxe yelled. “You don’t get to be ‘Barricade’ while the others of us have stupid branding nicknames!”
“Fine,” Barricade harrumphed. “I’m ‘Allspark Enhanced'. You can just call me…Enhanced.” He leaned back, smug.
“Allspark Enhanced to do what? Be obnoxious?” Recon sneered.
“Least I’m not tacky. What the frag you recon with those colors, you? A mall?”
“You shut up.” Recon pouted, his hands moving surreptitiously to cover the ‘security’ insignia on his upper arm panels. “It’s called redeco. You have it, too.”
“Yeah, but mine’s better. I was a Target exclusive.” Enhanced twisted his torso, showing off his blue coloring. “Sexy.”
“Sexy, my crankshaft,” Deluxe said. “I’m the oldest, therefore, I’m the best.”
“Right.”
“You’re both just lame repaints of me!”
“Repaint means improvement,” Recon huffed. “It means they were boring the first time around.”
“BORING? I am NOT boring!” Deluxe howled.
“Your colors are boring,” Enhanced agreed. “Frag, even your Frenzy is lame.”
Deluxe spluttered. “What is wrong with my Frenzy?! He’s exactly the same as yours!”
“Yours is grey. And boring.” Recon popped open his grille. “See? Mine’s blue.”
“Your face is blue!” Deluxe snarled.
“Uhhh, yeah? So’s Enhanced's.”
Deluxe balled his plastic fists. “You suck. Both of you.”
“My Frenzy’s red,” Enhanced boasted. “Much higher visibility. Better.”
“Thus feeding the fire of FIBRIR/FIRRIB debate,” Deluxe said, sarcastically. “Truly, you two are the pinnacle of evil.”
“You know what?” Another voice cut in, from the shelf above. “You three should shut the frag up.”
“Or else what, Interrogator-butt? You gonna give us purple nurples with your ‘probe arms’?” He made air quotes. The other two snickered. “Come on down here and try that.”
“You forget,” Interrogator said, smugly. “I’ve got Disc-Blast Frenzy up here. He may be grey and Primus knows he's annoying, but he’s got projectiles.”