Fic: Belonging No Where Together
The Request:
Pairing Wanted: Octane x Sandstorm.
Rating Wanted: PG13 - NC17
Song Wanted: Generator - Foo Fighters
Three things you'd like to see in your story: An unacknowledged mutual attraction brought into focus. A reference to neither being fully a part of their factions (Octane having been exiled for treachery, Sandstorm being originally from Paradron) but finding companionship with one another.
Three things you don't want to see: Non-con. Deathfic. Extreme angst. /:
Author:
Author’s Note: I’ve only seen Season One of GI, so the characters may be a bit OC and the storyline a bit AU. Hopefully it’ll still be an enjoyable read. Also, not sure how accurate the lyrics are - but I trust the interest; it never lies…
Lately I’m getting better
Wish I could stay sick with you
But there’s too many egos left to bruise
Call it sin
You can call it whatever
Eating deep inside of you
Well if it were me it’s all I’d ever do
Even with all that Autobot City had to offer, Sandstorm would find himself moving along the back roads of the surrounding landscape. The long drives would dredge up memories of more peaceful times, before his adopted home was destroyed. A part of him wanted to take the easy route of hating all Decepticons for bringing about the destruction of Paradron, but experience taught him that such blind views were dangerous.
Besides, if he had held such views, he never would have had the chance of befriending Octane. His thoughts gave pause as the image of the Decepticon rose up in his mind. It was strange to think that the one mech he’d consider to be a true friend, would be Octane. When he showed up that one time, looking for help in escaping Galvatron’s assassins, Sandstorm almost begged Octane to join with him, join the Autobots. He remembered how Octane appeared caught between laughing and shouting in anger.
Sandstorm didn’t blame him though. It really wasn’t the greatest thing to suggest to someone like Octane. Had their roles been reversed, Sandstorm wouldn’t have joined the Decepticons; More because of Galvatron himself than the actual faction. Old rumors still circulating spoke of a time when being a Decepticon was an honorable position and joining it meant purging society of the deceivers and power-mongers spread throughout it. Believing such things made understanding Octane easier. It made believing in Octane easier.
“You know, if I were any other Decepticon, I would have shot you breems ago.” A voice spoke out from above Sandstorm and only then did he realize he’d been idling at a small overlook.
Immediately he transformed from his dune buggy form into his bipedal mode, his weapons aimed up at the source of the voice.
Only to lower them a moment later, a big grin cracking across his face. There on a ledge above him, stood the subject of his recent musings.
“Octane!” he cried out. “What are you doing here?”
Octane dropped down from his perch before answering. “Just passing through…”
Sandstorm couldn’t resist the urge to wrap his arms around Octane in a firm hug. While he did tense up, Octane otherwise didn’t pull away or protest; he simply gave Sandstorm an unreadable look when the Autobot pulled away.
Octane finally just shrugged and looked out over the small valley. “So what had you so zoned out that I was able to sneak up on you without even sneaking?”
For a moment, Sandstorm wanted to lie, say it was nothing, but Octane wouldn’t believe him. Yet, what was wrong with the truth? He looked out over the valley too, his thoughts running in circles. The truth took you down paths you knew were there but were afraid of traveling down. But maybe…
Sandstorm looked at Octane from the corner of his optics. Maybe it wouldn’t be so hard if there were someone to travel the paths with. He took a deep breath.
“You.”
Steal me now and forever
I’ll steal something good for you
The criminal in me is no one new
Octane’s spark sputtered at Sandstorm’s one-word answer. He didn’t move; he wasn’t sure if he could. His higher processing systems were frozen at the admission but his voice was quick with a sharp response.
“Seems like a waste of processing to me.”
From his peripheral vision, he saw Sandstorm turn his head and focus his optics completely on him.
“I don’t think it is,” he replied.
Octane whirled around to face the Autobot. “What do you want from me?” He growled, fists clenching.
Sandstorm leaned back but, to his credit, he didn’t step away from him. “What do I want? Aren’t you the one who came looking for me?”
The Decepticon made a frustrated noise and shook his head. “Whether I’m here or light years away, you’re still here,” he said, pointing to his head. “At long last I’m accepted by my Decepticon brethren once more and yet all I can think about was a certain Autobot.”
“Octane, I-“
“I’m not done yet,” snapped Octane. “Don’t you understand? This isn’t a choice I can make! I’ve bound myself to the Decepticon cause!”
“Have you?” Sandstorm finally broke in. “Are you sure they haven’t bound you to their cause? Do you really have no choice?” He took a step forward, his voice lowering. “And do you really think you’re the only one who’s focus is someone that their faction wouldn’t approve of?”
The Decepticon made a sound of disbelief. “You should know me well enough that I don’t need the approval of anyone. Especially from someone like Galvatron.”
“Then why do you stay? If you’re so unhappy.” Came the question.
“Why do you stay?” retorted Octane.
Silence welled up between them. The point had been made. Octane knew Sandstorm’s answer was the same as his own: because there’s nowhere else to go.
Till you find something better
When there’s nothing left to use
And everything starts going down on you
“Forget me, Sandstorm,” he began more solemnly. “Surely you’ll find someone better than me to spend your time with.”
Sandstorm frowned. “What are you talking about? Has it occurred to you yet that maybe I don’t want there to be anybody else?”
The path of truth was growing more and more treacherous, the destination of full truth nearly upon them both.
Another step forward brought Sandstorm into Octane’s personal space. “We both know what it feels like not to belong anywhere but…” he trailed off and locked optics with Octane’s. “But when you’re here I…I feel like I do belong.”
The rogue Decepticon could feel the heat radiating off from Sandstorm. His optics strayed across the Autobot’s face and he fought the urge to lean into those pouting lips, to kiss away the worries.
He finally muttered a weak: “What does it matter? Together or separate, why do we keep going?” Confusion bogged down his processors. So much of him wanted to just stop talking and start moving…start acting on the emotions he felt whenever he was around Sandstorm.
Emotion. Only when he was with Sandstorm did he truly feel things besides fear and anger. They locked optics again and Octane decided that he was okay with that.
I’m the generator
Firing whenever you quit
Yeah, whatever it is
You go out and it’s on
Yeah can’t you hear my motored heart
You’re the one that started it
“For you,” Sandstorm admitted. “I keep going for you.”
The words surprised even him, but it was true. Ever since they first met, he’d never felt so alive. His spark pulsed stronger whenever he caught even a glimpse of Octane.
Then their optics locked that second time and Sandstorm whispered again, “You keep me go-mmph!”
Octane’s lips crushed against Sandstorm’s, even as strong arms wrapped around him. His resistant vanished in an instant and he wrapped his own arms around Octane.
Truth burst forth in such a dazzling light that it was as though the entire universe gave pause to admire the moment.
Sandstorm’s hands began to roam the body that held him tight. One hand moved downwards, the other traveled upwards, reaching the joint of Octane’s wings. A gasp erupted from him and Sandstorm grinned in triumphant at finding the sensitive spot. Doubtless there were more.
His other hand reached for an aft but Sandstorm gasped in surprise as Octane began his own explorations. Wires not meant to ever be seen were being teased and pulled as a second hand mimicked Sandstorm’s, running fingers over his aft. The two proceeded to touch and explore, their mouths meeting in force after each gasp of pleasure and surprise.
Octane suddenly arched against Sandstorm as said Autobot continued working at the sensitive wings. The movement pushed their pelvic plates together, teasing their cod pieces. Sandstorm was almost embarrassed by the groan he emitted, even as he continued to rub their groins together.
“I need-“ Octane began to say before Sandstorm cut him off.
“I know.”
How he knew, he couldn’t say - only that he needed it too. With gently yet nearly frantic movements, he brought them both down to lay on the ground. In a fluid motion, he straddled Octane and both of them groaned as he pushed their pelvic plates together again. Hands shaking, he unlatched his piece, his thick cord pushing out with new freedom.
Octane reached down to undo his own but Sandstorm batted his hands away. He unlatched the piece and gently pulled out Octane’s own heavy cable. With a little maneuvering, he guided the cable into his own port, even as he pushed his cable into Octane’s. Both mechs whimpered when the data circuit was complete, echoes of pleasure bouncing between their connection.
Sandstorm leaned over his writhing lover and captured his lips in another heated kiss. His spark pressed against its chamber walls even as he could feel Octane’s spark strain to do the same. For a third time, their optics locked and as though it were planned, their spark chambers slid open.
The earlier feedback loop was nothing compared to this.
As their sparks reached out to one another, both mechs caught glimpses of the other’s feelings and thoughts and memories. Octane experienced amazement at how similar they felt about their situations.
And at how wonderful they felt when the other was around.
Sandstorm grinned and kissed the rogue Decepticon once more.
Why didn’t we do this sooner? He thought at Octane, sending the message through their connected sparks.
He ‘heard’ Octane’s scoff and then Was too crowded.
Delight and joy filtered through the connection then, before a powerful, white bliss overwhelmed them.
Send me out on a tether
Swing it round
I’ll spin your noose
You let it down
I’ll hang around with you
Till you find someone better
When there’s no one left to lose
Everyone keeps going down
Sandstorm lied on his stomach, half sprawled across Octane. It was hard to say how long they laid there, but the sun was beginning to sink closer to the horizon.
With a heavy sigh, he finally said, “We can’t stay here.”
“Where do you want to go?” grumbled Octane.
He smiled and answered, “You know what I mean. Whether or not we have any kind of real choice, we still have to go back…if at least for a little while.”
“If you think the ware will be over any time soon, think again,” retorted the mech beneath him.
Sandstorm appeared thoughtful for a moment. “You’re probably right, but why couldn’t we still meet?”
Octane looked down at the mech on his chest. “Couldn’t? I can’t think of any reason. But shouldn’t? Galvatron would simply assume I was betraying him again and send more assassins.”
Sandstorm just grinned this time. “Well, you already know from experience that I’d be glad to take you in.”
At that, Octane did manage a slight smile. “Now I might be tempted to do so.”
“Ooo, I’d hate to tempt you to do something that might upset Galvatron!” The Autobot said in mock fear.
Octane chucked and wrapped his arms around his lover. “You’re starting to ruin my post-overload moment.”
“I’d hate to do that!” Sandstorm exclaimed and reached up to give him a chaste kiss before settling on his chest once more.
One by one, they watched the stars come out. Neither admitting to the other the number of obstacles that stood in their way but both acknowledging that it was only for the other that they kept moving forward. Together.
kurichai