Terrified Heart
Title: Terrified Heart
Author: ouronlyhunter
Continuity: Movie-’Verse
Characters: Sam, Lennox, Barricade
Pairing(s): Sam/Lennox/Barricade, Sam/Barricade
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Dubcon.
Wordcount: 2649
Disclaimer: Own none of it. Hasbro does.
A/N: A lot of the back story refused to be written. I barely got the porn done in time.
~~~~
Sam ran his fingers along Barricade’s stomach, the light touch enough that he barely felt the skin beneath, enjoying the warmth that bled through, groaning softly, keeping his eyes half-lidded, his thoughts not quite surfacing. He pushed down any that threatened to break through, his stomach already twisting, sharp bursts of hunger breaking up the deeper ache. Pulling himself closer to Barricade, Sam buried his face in the older man’s back, relaxing slightly.
Through it all, Barricade remained still, his breathing even, the rhythm suggesting that he was still asleep. Typical. As much as Sam wanted to call out, wake the Decepticon, he knew it was in his best interest to keep quiet, to wait, restless, adding pressure as his fingers continued to trail along Barricade’s body. As he felt the older man begin to stir, Sam froze, his heart speeding as he became more aware of the danger he put himself in, a primal instinct and fear that left him even more dazed, spiraling back down into a pleasant numbness.
By the time he recovered enough to speak, Barricade had shifted, one fluid movement and he was on his other side, facing Sam. He opened his mouth and Barricade took advantage of the moment, pressing forward, the kiss gentle before it turned bruising, the hand on his throat, fingers digging into the skin, the thumb pressing in, at the front, hard enough to cause pain when he swallowed or took a breath. Squirming, Sam pulled away, breaths ragged, beyond even trying to compose himself, his glares drawing only smirks, Barricade’s eyes glinting as he pushed back, the silence drawn out, adding to the tension between them.
“Fine.” Sam’s voice, low and rough, hung in the air, but if Barricade even heard he gave no indication, pushing further away, sitting on the edge of bed. As he started to get dressed, Sam closed his eyes. As always, he waited until Barricade left until he even considered getting up himself. Except the soft sounds continued, traveling around the room, and Sam shifted until he was lying on his back, hoping not to call attention to himself.
What are you expecting? Sam’s throat hurt as he deliberated asking the question out loud; his heart rose into his throat, the constant beat right under the dimming pain, that flutter calling it back to life until he did speak. “What do you want?” His eyes slid open at that accusation, his gaze finding Barricade, staying on the holoform
“Nothing.” The flat voice hinted at amusement.
Which only led Sam to wonder why he put himself through the hassle, although that led to half-formed and seemingly unrelated answers, none of which explained the situation to his satisfaction. “Just… go.” Sam’s voice, tired and hoarse, gave too much away, because Barricade just smirked, moving to the side of the bed, looking down, his eyes cold, searching, probably for more to use against Sam.
“You’ll see.” He sounded just about as smug as he looked, self-satisfied, reaching out, fingertips brushing Sam’s cheek, chuckling softly as Sam turned away, swallowed hard, hands clenching in the sheets. Each time, Sam found himself pinned down, wrists held to the bed until he fell still. Then the orders came, the hands, the hollow spot in his stomach forming, gnawing at him as he struggled with the weight of his own guilt, the weight now on top of him.
“No.” He shoved back this time, Barricade’s stillness terse. As Sam tried to decide if the sudden swing was compliancy a warning of danger, his body twitched, the shudders dying down. Suddenly freed, Sam sat up, grabbed his pants, focused only on putting them on, to distract him even if only for that time. When he looked up, Barricade stood in the doorway, and Sam scowled as he reached blinding for his shirt. By the time he had it over his head, he half expected the room to be cleared out. Barricade, still blocking the exit, postured, shoulders up straight, a dare for Sam to move past him. When he did, though, Barricade’s hand on his chest stopped him, without pushing back. “Let me go.”
Barricade’s hands dropped to his side before he stepped closer.
“No, I-”
Barricade’s head dropped slightly, pressing his lips against Sam’s, hard, Sam reaching out, fingers clenching at the older man’s sides, pulling him even closer, groaning softly against Barricade’s mouth, clawing for more now.
His eyes felt glassy when they parted, Barricade still hovering above Sam, mouths barely parted, the closeness too constricted. “Where’s Will?” Maybe bringing in the other human would deflect attention away from Sam, giving him an opportunity to flee.
“He left.”
“Great.” Sam wriggled, trying to get Barricade to take the first step back. Instead, he raised his hand, fingers running along the width of Sam’s neck, from front to back, drawing small shivers from him. One word could save him, maybe. No. Maybe ‘stop’, although if nothing else stopped Barricade, why would pleading with him work? Sam snorted softly, ignoring the sharp look that got him. No way was he going to resort to asking Barricade for anything, much less begging. Even if he did stay on base, manage not to kill anyone, although even Bee explained it as Prowl’s presence, drowning out any further answer with music. No one else spoke anymore about what might have happened, although Sam had managed to piece together that Prowl was Barricade’s older brother and hadn’t taken Barricade’s defection well. “Get him back.” Sam brightened when Barricade’s eyes narrowed at the order, dipping his hands under Barricade’s shirt, stroking the skin underneath. The small thrill that blossomed at the silent reaction scared him, although it didn’t stop him from flirting with danger, trying to push Barricade to the edge, but not quite over, not to the point where his repressed nature emerged, freeing him to act on those silent urges he made known when he hurt Sam, but not too much, not enough to leave any visible marks.
“Get him if you want any more.”
Barricade moved forward, forcing Sam to step back, changing the balance of power, Sam pulling back, almost cowering. The same question plagued him, the one about what would happen if anyone found out, although he suspected that Barricade planned on Bee discovering them since the smaller yellow mech seemed to rile Barricade more than any of the other Autobots, with the exception of Prowl. Barricade’s solution was to avoid his brother, the only mech that he went out of his way to evade. “What did he do to you?”
“I’ve already called him.” Barricade continued stepping forward, until Sam’s legs hit the side of the bed, an abrupt reminder of the current circumstances.
“Prowl. What did he do to you?” Sam glanced behind Barricade, at the door, before turning back to the dark haired man in front of him, in time to see his expression contort before going back to that placid emptiness.
“Major Lennox should be on base soon.”
“You don’t talk about him. You make sure you aren’t in the same room-”
Sam didn’t have time to avoid the blow, a severe backhand, with enough force behind it to leave him breathless. The sound of flesh hitting flesh shocked him almost as much as the sting. That would leave a mark, leave one side of his face red, demanding an explanation. Had he room, Sam would have stumbled back, instead of falling back, his knees giving way as he was slammed against the bed frame behind him, before he slipped down to the bed. By the time he regained composure, Barricade was on him, pinning him down with his hands and body, Sam crying out softly, but still arching up, into Barricade. He started to sit up, and Sam pushed at him, only to be pushed back down, Barricade’s knee on his chest, digging in, the pain blooming even before he tried to take another breath. He barely managed, lungs burning for air, his hands at Barricade’s leg, fingers scrabbling at the leather pants without managing to get a grip before he began to go dizzy, his movements slowing. The weight lifted before he passed out, his vision dark, and he writhed, the throbbing in his chest spreading. Sam shoved at Barricade weakly, and he reacted silently, swatting at the boy beneath him, toying with him and expending just enough energy to make it obvious. As Sam’s struggles died down, Barricade definitely took control again, leaning down, brushing his lips against Sam’s even as he began undressing himself.
Sam’s vision cleared, his thoughts still struggled, sluggish, his reaction time stalled. He remained still as Barricade turned his attention to Sam, the shirt ignored, working at the button of his jeans. Sam lifted his hips as he felt Barricade tug down, watching as the jeans give way, were taken off, tossed aside. His head fell, cheek resting against the mattress, feeling as if even that might not hold him up right now. He groaned as he felt the hand on his shaft, arching into the touch as Barricade began stroking, his breaths coming quicker already. He wanted to beg, please, for more, but caught himself just in time. When he spoke, his voice was low, hoarse, giving away what he refused to say. “Is Will coming or not?”
“He should be.” The smirk came through Barricade’s voice, his expression blank as he studied Sam, almost clinically, as if he might be rapt by the sight of Sam’s lips parting, tongue darting out to wet his lips. “Do you want to leave?”
Clearly Sam had no choice in the matter. Whatever he answered, he would stay, at least until Barricade finished making his point. So he answered without thinking, because even under the best of conditions, thinking about Barricade caused his head to pound. “No.” He pushed back, hoping that it might swallow him up for a second.
Barricade kept stroking, fondling, bringing Sam to the brink of orgasm before stopping until he calmed down. And then he started again. Squirming, his whimpers borderline sniveling, he missed the sound of the door opening, catching it only as it closed, hard enough to produce a hard snapping sound. Sam turned to face Will even as Barricade fell still, the Major watching, vacant look hiding his arousal. The layer of sweat covering his body made the sheet stick to Sam as he tried to get up to be pushed down, none too gently. “You came.”
“Barricade said it was an emergency.” He bristled, glancing at Sam, scrutinizing Barricade, before he sighed.
Sam choked on the words it almost was, the wordless sound making him the center of attention once more.
“This isn’t an emergency.” Will crossed his arms over his chest.
As Barricade continued his teasing, touch lighter than before, Sam wriggled, gasping out what he could manage. “I… asked…” He continued looking up, at and to Will, hoping he understood enough to stay.
The hard edges softened, the sigh full of resignation, and he nodded. Sam made a note to thank him later, not able to bring himself to show that gratitude now. He didn’t want Barricade to think that Sam needed anyone else around, to save him, to show any more weakness this round. Once Will began undressing, Sam let himself just enjoy the touches, push up into them, groaning, forcing back the desire for more, finally. “You know you don’t have to torture him.” Will’s amusement bled through his voice, spiked with more annoyance. He probably wanted to be home, with his family.
“It is what I do.” Leave it to Barricade to be even happier about the fact.
Sam recognized the hesitation, the doubt and guilt that ate at both him and Will, both of them careful not to carve the time out of their schedules to actually talk about anything having to do with Barricade. Their mutual distaste worked to their advantage, making that conversation meaningless. So Sam saw, and understood, and forgave the pause before Will finished stripping down, and joining them on the bed, just barely big enough to hold all three of them. Will shifted, forced the space for himself, pulling Sam to him, his fingers, and Sam obliged him, changing positions, so he was on his side. Barricade muttered above him, the grumbling muffled enough that the words remained intelligible. Still even he caved, behind Sam, pushing against him, his face warm against Sam’s shoulder, the breaths light and even warmer as they hit his skin. Will remained, for the most part, impassive, all his actions controlled as if he wanted to be here less than the other times. Sam would have asked, except that Will just pressed into the kiss, his fingers stroking Sam’s cheek, the other hand seeking space between them, fingertips dancing along Sam’s stomach, distracting him from the utter stillness behind him.
Will’s hand traveled down, Sam pulling away from the kiss to catch his breath, eyes half closed, moaning loudly in anticipation right before Will’s fingers curled around his shaft, stroking softly, Sam rocked with the motion, meeting Will’s pace. When he cried out, the sound quiet full of relief just knowing Will wouldn’t let this go on, not forever, Barricade made his move, biting down on the back of Sam’s neck, not enough to break skin or cause real pain but enough to remind Sam of the other man’s presence. He pushed forward, the head of his cock against Sam now. Sam pushed back, trying to get all three of them moving together, fumbling as he reached out blindly, his fingers sliding down Will’s chest, gripping Will, adding slight pressure before he began sliding his hand up and down, reciprocating despite Will’s dispassion.
Sam groaned as Barricade moved, pushed back further, Will deferring to them, leaving them to set the speed. Barricade moved fast, the selfish kind of tempo, the one that got him off without a thought for his partners. Sam knew better than to fight that, letting Barricade satiate himself, beyond feeling any pain as Barricade pushed forward, thrusting fast and hard. Or maybe he just accepted the pain, ignored it, letting the ever present thought that he just might somehow deserve it flit in and out of his consciousness. He chose his own focal points, his own hand on Will, desperately trying to get him off and Will’s efforts to do the same for Sam.
Barricade pulled his head back, grunting as he thrust forward, Sam’s free hand clenching at Will’s side, taking in a sharp breath. He made a small, low sound as Barricade continued, the grunts and satisfied groans behind him fading, tracking the holoforms movements only to match them, to minimize the discomfort.
Barricade cried out first, falling still, refusing to pull out or even away, clutching onto Sam until he tilted his head back, a small cry torn from his throat. Only then did Barricade begin to untangle himself, pulling away. Sam waited, hand moving feverishly until Will followed suit, both of them going limp against the mattress.
Barricade let the holoform dissipate, his interest in the humans fleeting, gone once he had drained all he could from them. Sam let his eyes flutter, close, reaching out, trying to pull Will closer. He twisted out of the grasp, sitting up. Sam did nothing to stop him, nothing to break the moment.
“I can’t do this anymore.”
Sam curled up. “I know.” Or he hadn’t known it would be now, but sooner or later? One of them was going to leave, and Will had more to lose if he stayed in the relationship. So it made sense, especially if he kept getting called in during the middle of the night. He kept his eyes closed, squeezing them shut as he felt the fingertips ghost along the top of his head.
Author: ouronlyhunter
Continuity: Movie-’Verse
Characters: Sam, Lennox, Barricade
Pairing(s): Sam/Lennox/Barricade, Sam/Barricade
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Dubcon.
Wordcount: 2649
Disclaimer: Own none of it. Hasbro does.
A/N: A lot of the back story refused to be written. I barely got the porn done in time.
~~~~
Sam ran his fingers along Barricade’s stomach, the light touch enough that he barely felt the skin beneath, enjoying the warmth that bled through, groaning softly, keeping his eyes half-lidded, his thoughts not quite surfacing. He pushed down any that threatened to break through, his stomach already twisting, sharp bursts of hunger breaking up the deeper ache. Pulling himself closer to Barricade, Sam buried his face in the older man’s back, relaxing slightly.
Through it all, Barricade remained still, his breathing even, the rhythm suggesting that he was still asleep. Typical. As much as Sam wanted to call out, wake the Decepticon, he knew it was in his best interest to keep quiet, to wait, restless, adding pressure as his fingers continued to trail along Barricade’s body. As he felt the older man begin to stir, Sam froze, his heart speeding as he became more aware of the danger he put himself in, a primal instinct and fear that left him even more dazed, spiraling back down into a pleasant numbness.
By the time he recovered enough to speak, Barricade had shifted, one fluid movement and he was on his other side, facing Sam. He opened his mouth and Barricade took advantage of the moment, pressing forward, the kiss gentle before it turned bruising, the hand on his throat, fingers digging into the skin, the thumb pressing in, at the front, hard enough to cause pain when he swallowed or took a breath. Squirming, Sam pulled away, breaths ragged, beyond even trying to compose himself, his glares drawing only smirks, Barricade’s eyes glinting as he pushed back, the silence drawn out, adding to the tension between them.
“Fine.” Sam’s voice, low and rough, hung in the air, but if Barricade even heard he gave no indication, pushing further away, sitting on the edge of bed. As he started to get dressed, Sam closed his eyes. As always, he waited until Barricade left until he even considered getting up himself. Except the soft sounds continued, traveling around the room, and Sam shifted until he was lying on his back, hoping not to call attention to himself.
What are you expecting? Sam’s throat hurt as he deliberated asking the question out loud; his heart rose into his throat, the constant beat right under the dimming pain, that flutter calling it back to life until he did speak. “What do you want?” His eyes slid open at that accusation, his gaze finding Barricade, staying on the holoform
“Nothing.” The flat voice hinted at amusement.
Which only led Sam to wonder why he put himself through the hassle, although that led to half-formed and seemingly unrelated answers, none of which explained the situation to his satisfaction. “Just… go.” Sam’s voice, tired and hoarse, gave too much away, because Barricade just smirked, moving to the side of the bed, looking down, his eyes cold, searching, probably for more to use against Sam.
“You’ll see.” He sounded just about as smug as he looked, self-satisfied, reaching out, fingertips brushing Sam’s cheek, chuckling softly as Sam turned away, swallowed hard, hands clenching in the sheets. Each time, Sam found himself pinned down, wrists held to the bed until he fell still. Then the orders came, the hands, the hollow spot in his stomach forming, gnawing at him as he struggled with the weight of his own guilt, the weight now on top of him.
“No.” He shoved back this time, Barricade’s stillness terse. As Sam tried to decide if the sudden swing was compliancy a warning of danger, his body twitched, the shudders dying down. Suddenly freed, Sam sat up, grabbed his pants, focused only on putting them on, to distract him even if only for that time. When he looked up, Barricade stood in the doorway, and Sam scowled as he reached blinding for his shirt. By the time he had it over his head, he half expected the room to be cleared out. Barricade, still blocking the exit, postured, shoulders up straight, a dare for Sam to move past him. When he did, though, Barricade’s hand on his chest stopped him, without pushing back. “Let me go.”
Barricade’s hands dropped to his side before he stepped closer.
“No, I-”
Barricade’s head dropped slightly, pressing his lips against Sam’s, hard, Sam reaching out, fingers clenching at the older man’s sides, pulling him even closer, groaning softly against Barricade’s mouth, clawing for more now.
His eyes felt glassy when they parted, Barricade still hovering above Sam, mouths barely parted, the closeness too constricted. “Where’s Will?” Maybe bringing in the other human would deflect attention away from Sam, giving him an opportunity to flee.
“He left.”
“Great.” Sam wriggled, trying to get Barricade to take the first step back. Instead, he raised his hand, fingers running along the width of Sam’s neck, from front to back, drawing small shivers from him. One word could save him, maybe. No. Maybe ‘stop’, although if nothing else stopped Barricade, why would pleading with him work? Sam snorted softly, ignoring the sharp look that got him. No way was he going to resort to asking Barricade for anything, much less begging. Even if he did stay on base, manage not to kill anyone, although even Bee explained it as Prowl’s presence, drowning out any further answer with music. No one else spoke anymore about what might have happened, although Sam had managed to piece together that Prowl was Barricade’s older brother and hadn’t taken Barricade’s defection well. “Get him back.” Sam brightened when Barricade’s eyes narrowed at the order, dipping his hands under Barricade’s shirt, stroking the skin underneath. The small thrill that blossomed at the silent reaction scared him, although it didn’t stop him from flirting with danger, trying to push Barricade to the edge, but not quite over, not to the point where his repressed nature emerged, freeing him to act on those silent urges he made known when he hurt Sam, but not too much, not enough to leave any visible marks.
“Get him if you want any more.”
Barricade moved forward, forcing Sam to step back, changing the balance of power, Sam pulling back, almost cowering. The same question plagued him, the one about what would happen if anyone found out, although he suspected that Barricade planned on Bee discovering them since the smaller yellow mech seemed to rile Barricade more than any of the other Autobots, with the exception of Prowl. Barricade’s solution was to avoid his brother, the only mech that he went out of his way to evade. “What did he do to you?”
“I’ve already called him.” Barricade continued stepping forward, until Sam’s legs hit the side of the bed, an abrupt reminder of the current circumstances.
“Prowl. What did he do to you?” Sam glanced behind Barricade, at the door, before turning back to the dark haired man in front of him, in time to see his expression contort before going back to that placid emptiness.
“Major Lennox should be on base soon.”
“You don’t talk about him. You make sure you aren’t in the same room-”
Sam didn’t have time to avoid the blow, a severe backhand, with enough force behind it to leave him breathless. The sound of flesh hitting flesh shocked him almost as much as the sting. That would leave a mark, leave one side of his face red, demanding an explanation. Had he room, Sam would have stumbled back, instead of falling back, his knees giving way as he was slammed against the bed frame behind him, before he slipped down to the bed. By the time he regained composure, Barricade was on him, pinning him down with his hands and body, Sam crying out softly, but still arching up, into Barricade. He started to sit up, and Sam pushed at him, only to be pushed back down, Barricade’s knee on his chest, digging in, the pain blooming even before he tried to take another breath. He barely managed, lungs burning for air, his hands at Barricade’s leg, fingers scrabbling at the leather pants without managing to get a grip before he began to go dizzy, his movements slowing. The weight lifted before he passed out, his vision dark, and he writhed, the throbbing in his chest spreading. Sam shoved at Barricade weakly, and he reacted silently, swatting at the boy beneath him, toying with him and expending just enough energy to make it obvious. As Sam’s struggles died down, Barricade definitely took control again, leaning down, brushing his lips against Sam’s even as he began undressing himself.
Sam’s vision cleared, his thoughts still struggled, sluggish, his reaction time stalled. He remained still as Barricade turned his attention to Sam, the shirt ignored, working at the button of his jeans. Sam lifted his hips as he felt Barricade tug down, watching as the jeans give way, were taken off, tossed aside. His head fell, cheek resting against the mattress, feeling as if even that might not hold him up right now. He groaned as he felt the hand on his shaft, arching into the touch as Barricade began stroking, his breaths coming quicker already. He wanted to beg, please, for more, but caught himself just in time. When he spoke, his voice was low, hoarse, giving away what he refused to say. “Is Will coming or not?”
“He should be.” The smirk came through Barricade’s voice, his expression blank as he studied Sam, almost clinically, as if he might be rapt by the sight of Sam’s lips parting, tongue darting out to wet his lips. “Do you want to leave?”
Clearly Sam had no choice in the matter. Whatever he answered, he would stay, at least until Barricade finished making his point. So he answered without thinking, because even under the best of conditions, thinking about Barricade caused his head to pound. “No.” He pushed back, hoping that it might swallow him up for a second.
Barricade kept stroking, fondling, bringing Sam to the brink of orgasm before stopping until he calmed down. And then he started again. Squirming, his whimpers borderline sniveling, he missed the sound of the door opening, catching it only as it closed, hard enough to produce a hard snapping sound. Sam turned to face Will even as Barricade fell still, the Major watching, vacant look hiding his arousal. The layer of sweat covering his body made the sheet stick to Sam as he tried to get up to be pushed down, none too gently. “You came.”
“Barricade said it was an emergency.” He bristled, glancing at Sam, scrutinizing Barricade, before he sighed.
Sam choked on the words it almost was, the wordless sound making him the center of attention once more.
“This isn’t an emergency.” Will crossed his arms over his chest.
As Barricade continued his teasing, touch lighter than before, Sam wriggled, gasping out what he could manage. “I… asked…” He continued looking up, at and to Will, hoping he understood enough to stay.
The hard edges softened, the sigh full of resignation, and he nodded. Sam made a note to thank him later, not able to bring himself to show that gratitude now. He didn’t want Barricade to think that Sam needed anyone else around, to save him, to show any more weakness this round. Once Will began undressing, Sam let himself just enjoy the touches, push up into them, groaning, forcing back the desire for more, finally. “You know you don’t have to torture him.” Will’s amusement bled through his voice, spiked with more annoyance. He probably wanted to be home, with his family.
“It is what I do.” Leave it to Barricade to be even happier about the fact.
Sam recognized the hesitation, the doubt and guilt that ate at both him and Will, both of them careful not to carve the time out of their schedules to actually talk about anything having to do with Barricade. Their mutual distaste worked to their advantage, making that conversation meaningless. So Sam saw, and understood, and forgave the pause before Will finished stripping down, and joining them on the bed, just barely big enough to hold all three of them. Will shifted, forced the space for himself, pulling Sam to him, his fingers, and Sam obliged him, changing positions, so he was on his side. Barricade muttered above him, the grumbling muffled enough that the words remained intelligible. Still even he caved, behind Sam, pushing against him, his face warm against Sam’s shoulder, the breaths light and even warmer as they hit his skin. Will remained, for the most part, impassive, all his actions controlled as if he wanted to be here less than the other times. Sam would have asked, except that Will just pressed into the kiss, his fingers stroking Sam’s cheek, the other hand seeking space between them, fingertips dancing along Sam’s stomach, distracting him from the utter stillness behind him.
Will’s hand traveled down, Sam pulling away from the kiss to catch his breath, eyes half closed, moaning loudly in anticipation right before Will’s fingers curled around his shaft, stroking softly, Sam rocked with the motion, meeting Will’s pace. When he cried out, the sound quiet full of relief just knowing Will wouldn’t let this go on, not forever, Barricade made his move, biting down on the back of Sam’s neck, not enough to break skin or cause real pain but enough to remind Sam of the other man’s presence. He pushed forward, the head of his cock against Sam now. Sam pushed back, trying to get all three of them moving together, fumbling as he reached out blindly, his fingers sliding down Will’s chest, gripping Will, adding slight pressure before he began sliding his hand up and down, reciprocating despite Will’s dispassion.
Sam groaned as Barricade moved, pushed back further, Will deferring to them, leaving them to set the speed. Barricade moved fast, the selfish kind of tempo, the one that got him off without a thought for his partners. Sam knew better than to fight that, letting Barricade satiate himself, beyond feeling any pain as Barricade pushed forward, thrusting fast and hard. Or maybe he just accepted the pain, ignored it, letting the ever present thought that he just might somehow deserve it flit in and out of his consciousness. He chose his own focal points, his own hand on Will, desperately trying to get him off and Will’s efforts to do the same for Sam.
Barricade pulled his head back, grunting as he thrust forward, Sam’s free hand clenching at Will’s side, taking in a sharp breath. He made a small, low sound as Barricade continued, the grunts and satisfied groans behind him fading, tracking the holoforms movements only to match them, to minimize the discomfort.
Barricade cried out first, falling still, refusing to pull out or even away, clutching onto Sam until he tilted his head back, a small cry torn from his throat. Only then did Barricade begin to untangle himself, pulling away. Sam waited, hand moving feverishly until Will followed suit, both of them going limp against the mattress.
Barricade let the holoform dissipate, his interest in the humans fleeting, gone once he had drained all he could from them. Sam let his eyes flutter, close, reaching out, trying to pull Will closer. He twisted out of the grasp, sitting up. Sam did nothing to stop him, nothing to break the moment.
“I can’t do this anymore.”
Sam curled up. “I know.” Or he hadn’t known it would be now, but sooner or later? One of them was going to leave, and Will had more to lose if he stayed in the relationship. So it made sense, especially if he kept getting called in during the middle of the night. He kept his eyes closed, squeezing them shut as he felt the fingertips ghost along the top of his head.