Nobody will ever stop them from breeding
1. HP crossover. Perceptor meet Hermione Granger and/or Luna Lovegood. Oh dear...
2. “Why is there a teddy bear on Teletraan 1’s main console?”
“He refuses to work if we try to take it away, Sir.”
“Come again?”
Note: Those who read ‘Hogfather’ will recognize the situation.
3. “Do you have anything to say?”
“I’m absolutely not sorry for what I’ve done.”
4. Red Alert frowned at Steeljaw. “Bad kitty,” he said crossly.
5. 2007. The Decepticons hold Judy Witwicky as a hostage. A very pissed off Judy Witwicky. May Primus have mercy on them...
6. First Aid looked uncertainly at his mentor. “Is insanity a contagious disease, Sir?”
Ratchet sighed. “Sometimes I really wonder.”
7. Sideswipe looked at the mech lying on the floor, totally passed out.
“How many cube of high-grade did he drink again?”
“Just one!”
8. “Whatever happen, never tell anyone one of your creator was from the opposed faction.”
“Why? It’s no so much of a big deal...”
The other mech stared at him. “You’re truly stupid or innocent, aren’t you?”
9. Grimlock / Starscream
10. Optimus Prime looked sternly at the culprit.
“Blaster, playing Mortal Kombat’s theme in the middle of a battle is not a good idea.”
11. “Could you tell me why Red Alert tried to burn these dolls at the stake?”
“Oh, he was mumbling something about them being evil and trying to take over the Earth. Nothing to worry about.”
12. How would you react if you learned that one of your best friend since the start of the war isn’t a mech, but a femme?
“I can’t believe Beachcomber never told me!”
“And I can’t believe you never noticed.”
“Because you knew?!”
13. Decepticons are depicted as rapists in fanfiction. But if, this time, it was the other way around? Starscream is expecting a sparkling after such an encounter...
“Sure, he looked inoffensive and lost and unstable at the time, but Red Alert was stronger than he appeared.”
And Red Alert has absolutely no idea of what happened...
14. “He’s not cute; he’s evil!”
15. Swoop shook his head. “You Grimlock no King; Prime is King.”
“Can me Grimlock be Queen?”
“Prime’s mate Elita One is Queen.”
“If me Grimlock kill her, me become Queen?”
“Me Swoop doesn’t think it’s good idea, but you can always try...”
16. Fireflight / Bluestreak
17. No matter how many time or how hard they tried, they had never managed to ban Wheeljack to make, touch or come within ten meters of any explosive device. Still, they hoped they would.
18. 2007. With the bonds they created between their two species, everybody knew someone would fall for an Autobot sooner or later. Sam wouldn’t have been a surprise. However, Simmons certainly was one.
19. Sparkplug Witwicky looked at the Dinobots, twitching.
“Don’t get me wrong, I know you guys were trying to be helpful but... flamethrower aren’t meant to be used to light cigarettes!”
20. “You can’t kill Wheeljack!”
“And why’s that?”
“’Cause Ratchet already claimed first dibs.”
21. “Flirting with Prowl will not get him to remove your handcuffs. However, it will get him to ask Prime to lock you up until... well, probably until the Universe is destroyed.”
22. “I can’t believe you used me as bait!”
23. “Nobody can play at ‘Tetris’ forever!”
“Well, look like Perceptor could.”
24. Red Alert groaned. “Go ahead, just tell me another good news, so I can go kill myself in peace!”
25. “In conversation, point arise! If a human being converse much, it is impossible for him to avoid the truth!” From Hercule Poirot’s Christmas.
26. “Sparklings stop being cute the moment they learn the concept of blackmail.”
27. “You don’t seem to understand; when a spark split to give twins, there can’t be two ‘males’ or two ‘females’. In the end, there is always one femme and one mech.”
“So, you’re telling me that...?”
“Yes. Either Sideswipe or Sunstreaker is a femme. We’re simply not sure which one at this point and they’re not telling us.”
28. To the victors go the spoils. Having lost the war, Starscream and his wingmates now belong to Optimus Prime.
“Hate me if you want, but remember I’m the only reason you’re still alive. Just how many Decepticons do you think are left?”
29. “An officer and a gentleman does not strike a lady!”
“I hardly think of Chromia as a lady, especially when she’s shooting at me!”
30. “Wheeljack, you actually put munition chips in action figurines? Humans’ toys sold to young children? Are you insane?!” Note: What can I say? I love ‘Small Soldiers’.
31. Slag / Motormaster
32. 2007. When Miles first meet the Autobots, he freaks.
“What proof do you have they are the good guys? I mean, they could be lying about everything they told you and you wouldn’t even know.”
33. Yu-Gi-Oh. An Autobot find and solve the Millennium Puzzle. Bumblebee, perhaps? Or Perceptor?
34. Same as previous, but with a Decepticon instead. Can you imagine Soundwave’s reaction when dealing with two kind of thoughts coming from the same person?