Tomorrow ... Don't Make Me Cross This Desert Alone 2
Title - Tomorrow ... Don't Make Me Cross This Desert Alone 2
Paring - BeexBarricade
Rating - Nc/17 - M
Disclaimers - All characters are over 18.
Transformers aren't mine.
Thanks - to my wonderful beta that helped me English_Enigma - Nova I'Sif she gave me inspiration - Blackbolt and Speechie42 because they always support me with beautiful words.
Second chapter and Barricade still has to face his past ... what he was and what he's now.
If you are looking for the first one you can find it here.
Chapter 1
Tomorrow ... Don't Make Me Cross This Desert Alone 2
Bee is looking around ... scanning the area as tiny drops of salt water slide along his body ... he shakes his head ... wet hair sticking in every direction as he's sitting on my surfboard waiting.
"Bumblebee!" I call him as I slam a big fish on the surfboard that he's straddling. "This is our dinner."
Bee grins at me widely. "You made it! But we don't need to eat."
"Yeah, I know, I just wanted to kill something ... hey, hold on to the board," I warn him then straddle it ... placing myself in front of him. "Fucking cold, today," I shiver while sniffing and looking around us.
"Humans are really vulnerable," Bee explains ... like I didn't know.
"Yeah, but I can't go fishing in my own robot - form," I point out while still staring around us.
The sky is dull and a cold wind makes us slowly spin. "Did you ... did you talked with Ratchet?"
He widens his arctic eyes. "No ... no, why you are asking this?"
"Come on, Bee, I caught that fucking signal ... Ratchet asking what was going on," I reply annoyed. "I'm not stupid ... you blocked him." Bee only nods while gazing down as his foot kicks some water. "It would be so bad if they knew, eh?" I ask.
"I think so," he replies licking his lips. "They think that you are gone."
I sigh. "Come on, let's not think about it.”
"Prime would not be so happy knowing about that ... me and you-"
"Don't think about it!" I cut him off. "Come on let's return to the beach and cook this fucking fish," I say while jumping in the water and pushing the board and him toward the shore.
"Sooner or later Ratchet will want to see me," Bee tells me while he walks behind me but I don't reply to him. "Hey, Cade!"
"I know ... I know but, fuck, I think that you'll be smart enough to shoot some bullshit and get rid of him," I say while going to stash the surfboard ... he doesn't reply and I turn toward him. "Oh, don't start again with that fucking story of being loyal and honest toward your friends!"
"It's not my fault that Decepticons ... better yet Megatron never taught you about those two things," he points out walking toward me, and boy, he's fucking beautiful when he's upset ... I like wild boys.
"If you want to fight, well, you found the right place," I warn him. "It’s been too long since I’ve let go of some adrenaline.”
"I don't want to fight ... with you" he whispers the last words. "It’s just that you don't have anybody left so, for you, it's simple to do what you want without others knowing.”
"No you are wrong!" I spit out. "Because your fucking super friends are still here ... still keeping an eye ... suspiciously ... and believe me it's not so simple to find a place to hide.”
"Nobody told you to do it!" Bee yells.
"Yeah, but I prefer to hide myself instead of being smashed by Autobots ... let's face it, they are more than me," I bark out pointing my finger toward him. "Do you really think that they will be so generous and compassionate as to spare me?"
"We aren't cruel," he replies. "You should know that we are more -"
"Well fuck you and the Autobots!" I bark out. "For you it's simple to talk, eh Bumblebee ... you still have someone beside you ... but look at me. I don't have anybody left ... all the others are gone ... destroyed ... I'm living on this fucking beach ... with this fucking human form that I hate because I can't go around transformed in my robot - form ... let's not talk about my other car - form ... too fucking easy to recognize, so don't come here and talk bullshit."
Bee remains frozen in front of me. "And don't stare at me in that way ... come on!" I say ... almost regretting having snapped at the boy ... in the end it's not his fault ... me being the last one of my kind ... me forced to hide on this forgotten beach.
"Bumblebee," I call him while reaching for his hand but he backs away while shaking his head ... and I feel my spark ache with the loss ... fuck you, boy! Being able to reduce me ... the evil Barricade into a sappy robot.
"You ... talk shit about the Autobots!" he cries out. "But they’re my family ... what do you think, huh? It's not simple for me to lie to them ... to be with you, a ... a Decepticon. No, it's not simple. I spent a whole fucking year making my mind up over you ... wanting you, and believe me that my choice wasn't easy. You are still an enemy for us.”
"I know," I breathe out while biting my bottom lip hard. "I ... I ... it's just that I-"
"You what, Cade?" he barks out. "You live here doing whatever you want. Instead I ... I have to face my leader ... my fellows and I’ve never lied to them ... never!"
"I didn't ask you to lie for me!" I snap kicking some sand. "Never, Bumblebee, nor did I force you to do anything ... you could choose ... you chose how to act."
"Because I love you," he hisses. "Don’t make me regret that.”
"But what do you want ... come on you can walk away or just destroy me, who cares ... look, I don't fucking care anymore!" I yell as I feel my spark burn with that feeling ... that sensation that I know so well ... a desire to fight ... to just feast on him ... bloody evil Barricade ... but I shake my head trying to stay clear ... to restrain myself.
"I don't want to destroy you but you have to understand my position," he yells back. "It’s not easy to go to bed with the enemy.”
"I never asked for that," I point out ... oh fuck ... oh fuck; I want to rape him so badly. To just ravish that delicious body ... young body ... to just show him that my kind is above them ... superior ... to just teach him a lesson ... never contradict Barricade.
He wails, gazing up ... like holding back his thoughts ... his words ... still ... still controlling himself ... not wanting to offend me ... to just snap and yell at me whatever he's thinking now.
"Come on spill it, Bumblebee ... what are you holding back?" I yell while glaring at him ... my eyes becoming a shade of dark, bloody red ... my favourite colour.
"Don't make me-"
"What?" I bark out. "Just spit it out, Bumblebee, so we can get this over with.”
"What do you want, Barricade!" he asks me exasperated. "It’s not my fault that the Decepticons are gone ... that you have to hide here."
I remain in silence just staring at him ... fucking beautiful boy ... so full of life and so different from me ... so fierce ... so ... so good ... yeah, absolutely different from me ... I want to poison him ... to stain him ... no ... no ... no, I can't ruin what I love ... no matter what ... just shut up! Leave me alone, I'm different now... Barricade ... Cade you can't deny your past ... you can't close your eyes to what you were ... haunting you ... I'm here, Barricade, let me free ... devour him ... he deserves it ... come on, he wants it ... to be destroyed by you ... slowly drowning in you ... make him yours ... in the way that you love ... branding him ... showing the true Decepticon nature.
I shake my head. "I know," I only reply.
He sighs. "Ok, I'm going," he tells me while putting on his t - shirt.
I rub my forehead while thinking furiously of what to say ... damn boy and the games that he makes me play! Why have I become this ... why did I fall in love with him ... fuck him.
"No, stay," I tell him.
"Obviously you don't want me to stay ... nor do you need me," he coldly replies and I would love to just slam his head into that fucking yellow hood of his Camaro while yelling that he should respect me ... I'm in charge here ... I'm Barricade.
Stubborn boy I think while he's glaring at me ... Prime should teach him a few lessons ... obstinate, stupid robot! I take a big breath briefly closing my eyes ... I will not snap ... I will not snap at him ... I will not become a fury ... I keep repeating to myself like a mantra. "Just ... stay," I slowly repeat ... spelling each fucking little word.
He sighs while looking at me. "It’s not so simple, huh?"
I shake my head. "No ... you are an Autobot and I'm a Decepticon," I remind him. "Prime doesn't have to know or I'll be dead," I tell him.
"Maybe he will be able to understand and-"
"No, he will think that I forced you ... you know, stuff like that," I shrug and he nods.
"Why didn't you leave?" Bee asks me after a long moment of silence.
"Eh, I really don't know," I sigh. "I wanted to go somewhere but ... but I thought, I could go anywhere but any place still wouldn’t really be my home.”
"Earth is not that bad," he tells me while wrapping his hand around mine.
"I will never get used to it because my real home is gone. Destroyed by own our stupidity," I say while shaking my head.
We remain in silence as I'm staring down and then he leans forward capturing my lips and I whimper inside his kiss ... me whimpering ... Barricade whimpering ... but it's a wrenching feeling; a sickness of mine because I really miss my home, and if I think that I contributed toward destroying it ... and now ... now I find myself reflecting that I shouldn't have followed Megatron and his crazy plans of conquering everything ... we just fought between ourselves to reach something that, in then end, wasn't worth it. The cube ... the Allspark wasn't ours but we didn't ... we denied seeing it ... to understand that we should have stopped and saved our planet.
I deepen the kiss as I cup his face ... sucking his tongue as I pull him toward the entrance of the hut. "Want you so bad," I hiss roughly while licking his lips.
We crash on the bed and he laughs when I start to tickle him and he begs me to stop so he can stop laughing ... as his hands are feebly pushing against my chest and then, as I lean down to kiss his throat, his fingers entwine in my short, black hair while moaning as I lick and suck leaving red bruises that I know he doesn't want to fade away ... like a fading memory that he wants to keep impressed ... to remember always ... forever. And I'm here for him for to recall it anytime ... making one ... creating one memory for him of what we have ... of what we are sharing between us ... forbidden and misunderstood love ... passion that burns our sparks and makes us want more ... crave for more. Lines ... boundaries that are broken ... overstepped as we lie naked, me over him ... him under me ... my enemy that is shaping into something more ... transforming into more ... in my love, and every day is another notch ... another step that makes it impossible for me to give up on him ... that tie me more ... strands of desire and want that entrap me in a web that I never want to escape from because I love him.
A tide ... a tide of mine that washes my body ... my system ... water swirling slowly and sensuously around me as I'm stepping inside this ocean of mine ... warm water caressing my skin as I let him devour my entire being ... as his hands are licking my skin and, please oh please, don't just walk away and leave me another day ... a day that I will try to slow down, to just try to keep it alive more and more ... never ending as you are whispering that you want me, and nobody’s wanted me ... nobody cared for me while touching my body with such reverence and need ... Barricade the bastard, the cold killer ... washing my hands in blood and black oil ... staining myself once more ... never looking back for fear of regretting ... someone choosing what would be my destiny for me... tainted Barricade.
And then he's spreading his thighs making room for me... my body sliding between his legs as his sparkling arctic eyes are on me ... and, fuck, it's like getting lost ... to just let ice freeze you ... a white, iced sensation that envelops you all and my hand is teasing his entrance and I want more ... everything that he can give me ... because it cleans me ... it makes me feel like another person ... another being.
Tiny voices hiding in the darkness of my garden just staring at me ... calling me as pale fingers want to keep me there ... in that dark garden ... humid sensation that I know so well ... don't leave us, Barricade ... no, Cade, you can't leave us ... take what you want from the boy that is lying under you so trusting ... teach him a lesson ... burn what he thought that you would be.
And their hands are upon my chest ... my spark, and their sweet enchanting voices are whispering in my ears ... skin, please Cade, do that ... feast on him ... let's drink in his pain and laugh at his screams like the old days when you could orgasm just by inflicting pain on others ... to punish and enslave, Barricade ... it was always that, Cade, and what would it be to just bury yourself inside him ... to bruise him more ... staining him with your poison and, fuck. Oh, evil Muse, that are tempting me and wont leave me alone ... her slender fingers turning my face toward hers ... majestic beauty as she kisses me and I let her kiss me ... go, Cade, take what you want ... she whispers wetly against my lips, her white hair tickling my skin ... go, Cade.
"Cade?" Bee calls me while turning my face toward me. "Shhhh ... don't listen to that voice," and he knows ... he easily knows that I'm fighting against myself.
"I want you in a way that is beyond pleasure and pain," I whisper as my hand goes to close around his throat.
"You ... you don't want that," he breathes out while his hands wrap around my wrist. "That was your past.”
"And who told you that I don't like that," I grin while hungrily licking my lips.
"Look at me, Cade," he cries out as I tighten my hold more. "Cade, please.”
I yell in anger as I quickly get up going to punch the wall. "Fuck you, go away!"
"You weren't going to do that, Cade," he tells me while massaging his throat ... red marks from my fingers on his pale skin.
"What is making you believe that I wouldn't want that, Bee?" I hiss. "You better go away because-"
"Because what, Cade?" he asks while rising up from the bed.
"I don't know if next time I will have the strength to restrain myself ... fuck you, this is not my nature!" I point out while pushing him away as he tries to grab one of my hands.
"You will not harm me," he quietly says while reaching again for my hand. "Cade, listen to me.”
"No, fuck you, no ... look at me, Bumblebee, I really don't know where I'm going ... what I want ... and all these voices and my past are mixing together," I cry out. "It’s not so simple when you only want to wash your hands with blood.”
"Fuck me and don't think of anything," he barely whispers.
"If ... if I don’t think then ... then I will be insane ... I can harm you. I-"
He shushes me with a kiss and then he silently lies on the bed. "Please, Cade," he begs as he spreads his thighs wide open making me wail in frustration.
"What do you want, Bee!" I yell out as I straddle his body. "Fuck you and your games ... I'm not what you want ... I'm not myself ... I don't know."
"Lower your defences, Cade," he whispers as his fingers tease my nipples and I hiss in pleasure.
"You are like a rare sensation that makes me almost drown," I roughly say while two of my fingers push inside him making him jump in surprise. "Make me forget if you dare ... if you dare, Bee.”
"I dare you to forget and get lost in me," he moans while his fingers grab hold of my delicate antennae forcing me to lean down and kiss him as my fingers fuck him ... roughly inviting him to give up ... to surrender to me ... come on, pretty, just let me work you; get you ready for my cock ... want you so bad, pretty.
I take them out while positioning against his entrance ... my hand flat on his pelvis as I start to push inside him ... stomach shivering with the effort to take me ... trembling under my palm as I look at him ... darkening eyes that are now sliding closed as I bury myself in him, and his hands ... fingers ... nails scratching my chest like wanting to push me away and deny me my pleasure ... his lips are slightly wet and he whimpers in pain as I start to fuck him ... tight warm sensation around my cock ... spasming as I'm adjusting my position.
"Cade," he calls me as my fingers dig into his inner thighs to spread them more.
"Let me fuck you deeper, Bee," I moan leaning down to suck his nipples as his hands slide through my hair.
He moans as I slow down my pushes letting him enjoy the friction while smiling lazily at him. “Is it ok?" I ask and he nods as I gaze down at the base of my cock buried inside his ass.
I bury my face in the crook of his neck as my pushes become more frantic ... just wanting to reach our orgasm ... drag him with me ... he lets me enter inside his system ... truly connected, white light enveloping me as I come filling him with my seed ... entwining our systems ... our beings, as his spasming asshole milks out my orgasm.
He comes with my name on his puffy lips as I slow down my pushes. "I love you," he tells me while lazily kissing me as my come makes slick wet sounds.
"I love you, too," I reply while resting my head on his chest.
At dawn he's looking at me sleeping next to him ... recharging, and then quietly he gets up starting to dress himself.
"Bee," I groan not opening my eyes. "Pretty, where are you going?"
"I received a call from Prime," he whispers leaning over to kiss my temple. "Sleep, it's still early.”
"Stay with me," I whine softly while rubbing my forehead on the pillow. "Fuck Prime and his needs.”
He kisses me. "If I don't go he will suspect something," he replies and I nod.
"Ok, but as soon as you can come back to me," I tell him. "Fucking love you.”
"Hmmmm, romantic policeman," he laughs and then he just walks outside with me pulling the covers up over my face while falling asleep again.