Body image and body confidence part 2
Now that the toddler is asleep, I can continue.
There are a lot of forces, both personal and societal, that shape our views about our bodies. Generally speaking, it seems that women have a pair of conflicting pressures: to be sexual, attractive, "salable" on the one hand, and to be chaste, innocent, blameless on the other. Need I mention that both sides push women into roles as passive objects? So, in a horrible catch-22, women are condemned for displaying exactly what society says is what is most valuable about them as a woman. Yes, this is all a dimestore simplification, but I'm trying to give enough of a frame to relate my own experiences to, not run a class in gender theory.
Men, meanwhile, get messages that insist they be "masculine" (active, strong, athletic) and heterosexual but homosocial. This conveniently works both to marginalize nonconforming men and subordinate women. Even those marginalized men generally absorb enough of the standards that they, too, cooperate somewhat in the subordination of women, wanting to be "part of the top" rather than equal with everyone. Needless to say, these are generalizations, and I both acknowledge that there are plenty of exceptions and happily admit that in many respects significant progress has been made, even within my lifetime. For men, there's also a strong association between unmasculine and homosexual, one which is reflected in plenty of vivid stereotypes. Men (and especially adolescents, who are most energetically concerned with working out the place of these standards and images in their lives) are taught that homosexuality is the ultimate transgression, and insufficient masculinity is a warning sign of homosexuality.
Ok, going to have to tie this to personal experience in part 3. Damn, but this whole thing is getting long-winded!
There are a lot of forces, both personal and societal, that shape our views about our bodies. Generally speaking, it seems that women have a pair of conflicting pressures: to be sexual, attractive, "salable" on the one hand, and to be chaste, innocent, blameless on the other. Need I mention that both sides push women into roles as passive objects? So, in a horrible catch-22, women are condemned for displaying exactly what society says is what is most valuable about them as a woman. Yes, this is all a dimestore simplification, but I'm trying to give enough of a frame to relate my own experiences to, not run a class in gender theory.
Men, meanwhile, get messages that insist they be "masculine" (active, strong, athletic) and heterosexual but homosocial. This conveniently works both to marginalize nonconforming men and subordinate women. Even those marginalized men generally absorb enough of the standards that they, too, cooperate somewhat in the subordination of women, wanting to be "part of the top" rather than equal with everyone. Needless to say, these are generalizations, and I both acknowledge that there are plenty of exceptions and happily admit that in many respects significant progress has been made, even within my lifetime. For men, there's also a strong association between unmasculine and homosexual, one which is reflected in plenty of vivid stereotypes. Men (and especially adolescents, who are most energetically concerned with working out the place of these standards and images in their lives) are taught that homosexuality is the ultimate transgression, and insufficient masculinity is a warning sign of homosexuality.
Ok, going to have to tie this to personal experience in part 3. Damn, but this whole thing is getting long-winded!