It's about that time when things start to downfall....
I'm not in the best of moods... things haven't been so good these days. After having a few parties so many things have just sucked. A lot of my stuff has been stolen. I've been cleaning and cleaning the basement and after that someone else comes over and just trashes it again. I'm sick of all this shit. I'm laying down some fuckin rules. I will always be keeping the side door locked for now on. If anyone wants to come over they have to come through the front door. Plus I don't want so many people just helping themselves to whatever the fuck they want. I'm not a free resteraunt or some bullshit. I'm really sick of people walking all over me and abusing their priveldges. For instance.. people just leave their shit all over the place, don't through anything away, don't fold blankets when done using, ash all over my carpet which is fucking disgusting, knocking over drinks on my just cleaned carpet, etc. I'm putting an end to all of this shit. My house and my shit will be respected.. especially me! I can't keep track of where anything is. I just found out that someone stole my PS2 and all of my fucking games. The wire on my new speakers that I payed $170 for.. the cord has been ripped and the connector is broken which is hardwared straight to the speaker so the whole 2 speakers and sub won't work now. Half of my dvd's are stolen and the ones that aren't are all scratched laying all over the place with beer spilled all over them. With the past few days I've been trying to record Joel and Josh's band for a demo so they can play at places like Peabodys but obviously some of the members are half-assing it and if people won't cooperate when I'm doing this for free then it's just a lot of agravation and tension for no fuckin reason. I haven't gotten back to a couple of people which is my bad.. I've just had a lot of shit on my mind so for whoever feels that I've avoided them please don't take it personal. I'm just trying to get my shit together. Besides all of this shit I have a problem with someone I like but can't bring up cause it would start way to many problems. I can't have it interfer with certain things either. So that's been driving me insane. Loneliness is whatever.. not that big of a deal. I mean everyone gets it from time to time. I guess it bugs me seeing so many people get with people and these guys.. all they want is to fuck them and have a good sexual time. Now I think that sexual things are funny but not in a sense of being a complete whore. GOD I HATE MY FUCKING GENDER!!! *sighs* I just need lay down and watch a movie or something... I just got word that my dad was sent to the E.R. so I have no clue what's going on with that. My mom's there right now and told me she'd call me and let me know what's wrong. She sounded upset. I just kinda wish I had something more to calm me down the stupid ass fuckin nicotine. Fuck cigs... it's just in no way compares the way a hug or a smile makes you feel a lil better and calm... which I don't have right now.