I sit here
I sit here and kick myself in the ass. Being over here in Afganistan has given me a lot of time to think. I am a fucking Asshole. I look at all the people that used to mean so much to me a couple of years ago but i butt fucked them and now look at me!!!! Right now i can honestly say that i have two real friends...My brother Jeff, and Sara my fiancee. But i ask you, can a man servive on two friends? Knowing that i could have so much more and actually be happy with myself? Fuck no! But what does it matter!!! I could die any day now!!! The rocket attacks are getting worse and worse every day and i see more soldiers and marines dieing around me as time goes by. Fuck me!!!!!!! Maybe i deserve to die! I dont know but if i did die tonight i would not be content with the life i have led. No matter how many times i say im sorry to those who were around me in high school i never feel better. Fuck me And fuck everything i am!!!