its so hard to say goodbye....
ive realized that i am on a good track... and im happy with things and where they are going... well that is until i look at my past... i am having the hardest time moving on from my past and saying goodbye. im happy that all those time exist, but it has become apparent that i am the only person who misses them... i so dearly love everyone i am surrounded by, and i am so thankful to have who i have in my life, or i wouldnt have lasted out here in california, but at the same time ive had alot of bonds broken and i didnt imagine it would be this hard to say goodbye and just let it be... im having to do some major growing. i need to just let things be and focus on me. im trying to find a better career for myself and im doing a lot of soul searching... im completely happy with where chris and i are headed and i just need to focus on moving forward! i miss those involved in certain parts of my past and i wish it didnt hafta be this way, but im slowly accepting it all and trying to do what's right, by maintaining the friendships that want to still be maintained. im never going to forget all that ive been through, or the experiences ive had, but hopefully im no longer going to dwell on them so heavily due to its time to move on, and not to be selfish but my life is all about me and its time that i made it that way...