am i missing out?
so many random thoughts on life.
my brother turned 18 yesterday. .. what the hell?? where did the time go?! i feel bad.. like i'm missing out on his life & him growing up. even though he IS a big boy.. i guess it's the older sisterness in me kicking in. it's nice going back & seeing that he has his own life going on. like his friends & school & whatnot. dang. he goes out more than i do! haha.. it's nice to see that. but it sucks when.. we dont really hang out together because he's hanging with his friends & me with mine. blah. yea.
it's bad. i feel like i'm doing NOTHING with my life. the big thing running repeatedly in my mind.. is balancing everything. GRR! family/school/work/friends - it's all supposed to be balanced! & it's all practice for later on in life. but geeez! i feel the burden. i cant do it. i have my moments where i THINK i can. but then.. one or two aspects always overshadow the other & cause pandemonium. i feel like a bum just focusing on school. in class the other day, someone asked the teacher "would you hire someone even if it took them 8 years to graduate?" & he said he'd pick that person over the person who just focuses on school. because it teaches them self discipline & whatnot. blah. i dont know.
finals on monday, wednesday & friday. i cant wait for break!
my brother turned 18 yesterday. .. what the hell?? where did the time go?! i feel bad.. like i'm missing out on his life & him growing up. even though he IS a big boy.. i guess it's the older sisterness in me kicking in. it's nice going back & seeing that he has his own life going on. like his friends & school & whatnot. dang. he goes out more than i do! haha.. it's nice to see that. but it sucks when.. we dont really hang out together because he's hanging with his friends & me with mine. blah. yea.
it's bad. i feel like i'm doing NOTHING with my life. the big thing running repeatedly in my mind.. is balancing everything. GRR! family/school/work/friends - it's all supposed to be balanced! & it's all practice for later on in life. but geeez! i feel the burden. i cant do it. i have my moments where i THINK i can. but then.. one or two aspects always overshadow the other & cause pandemonium. i feel like a bum just focusing on school. in class the other day, someone asked the teacher "would you hire someone even if it took them 8 years to graduate?" & he said he'd pick that person over the person who just focuses on school. because it teaches them self discipline & whatnot. blah. i dont know.
finals on monday, wednesday & friday. i cant wait for break!