Decisions made... all I can do now is follow through...right?

[terco85]

My mistakes have been made...its time to make the most of what I've left myself. Endless nights have been spent wondering, worrying, doubting. Insomnia is the only result that comes from all that. Two months...very little sleep. Starting to draw away from everyone. Sitting in my room alone, lying in bed, no sound. No sound but the thoughts running thorugh my head, the doubts running through my head. You fucked up once, whose to say that the change of scenery is going to change anything?

Can't be a recluse, go out, hang with friends...but I'm not all there. I think I hide it well, who the fuck knows, sometimes I'm transparent when I think I'm opaque. Gotta be there for my friends. Be there for someone else when I can't be there for myself.

Stop being dramatic. You haven't fucked up that bad. You can still fix this. Get your ass in gear, stop wallowing in self pity. So you fucked up...big fucking deal, you're not perfect, you're no where near. Deal with it. Your time of always excelling had to come to an end sometime. Be thankful for the fact that your parents are understanding, be thankful for the fact that everyone knows that mistakes happen, shit happens. Pick yourself up. Stop being a little pussy baby.

I've made my plans...all I can do now is follow though...right?