The One Right Way
I hold strong opinions about the One Right Way to do any given task. Of course there is One Right Way to do everyything, why do you ask? My Weltanschauung does not permit the concept of multiple, equally valid methods. Strangely, people often seem reluctant to hear my advice on doing their tasks the One Right Way, especially when they are in the midst of devoting great effort to doing it their own, incorrect way. I wonder why that is?
No matter, I will publish my wisdom here for the benefit of all. After all, I have obtained this knowledge through great effort. Just this morning, for instance, I discovered at least five wrong ways to make yam rolls. Er, no, I have not yet nailed down the right way. I'm working on it, OK?
The One Right Way to clean the tub after an oil bath: after a nice soak, no-one, not even me, wants to bother scrubbing out the oil. However, if you leave it there, it will be slippery as ice the next morning. Therefore, sprinkle baking soda* into the tub after all the water has drained. This will saponify the residual oil, which will wash away harmlessly when you first turn on the shower.
The One Right Way to cook scrambled eggs: Heat a non-stick pan over high heat. A really non-stick pan, not just one that was non-stick in the dim and distant past, before you cleaned it with baking soda.** Melt two pats of butter in the bottom, and swirl them around so that they coat the pan. When the butter sizzles, add three eggs and turn the heat down to medium. When the white of the egg is half-cooked, stir it up so as to break the yolks. When the yolks are two-thirds cooked, turn the pan off and cover it. Wait 90 seconds and serve..
*Baking soda is often the One Right Way to clean anything. I keep a sugar-shaker full of it for just this reason.
**Baking soda is not at all the One Right Way to clean non-stick pans. Actually, it's one of the worse of the very many wrong ways.
No matter, I will publish my wisdom here for the benefit of all. After all, I have obtained this knowledge through great effort. Just this morning, for instance, I discovered at least five wrong ways to make yam rolls. Er, no, I have not yet nailed down the right way. I'm working on it, OK?
The One Right Way to clean the tub after an oil bath: after a nice soak, no-one, not even me, wants to bother scrubbing out the oil. However, if you leave it there, it will be slippery as ice the next morning. Therefore, sprinkle baking soda* into the tub after all the water has drained. This will saponify the residual oil, which will wash away harmlessly when you first turn on the shower.
The One Right Way to cook scrambled eggs: Heat a non-stick pan over high heat. A really non-stick pan, not just one that was non-stick in the dim and distant past, before you cleaned it with baking soda.** Melt two pats of butter in the bottom, and swirl them around so that they coat the pan. When the butter sizzles, add three eggs and turn the heat down to medium. When the white of the egg is half-cooked, stir it up so as to break the yolks. When the yolks are two-thirds cooked, turn the pan off and cover it. Wait 90 seconds and serve..
*Baking soda is often the One Right Way to clean anything. I keep a sugar-shaker full of it for just this reason.
**Baking soda is not at all the One Right Way to clean non-stick pans. Actually, it's one of the worse of the very many wrong ways.