The Lonely Road
the lonely road
infinite/f(x) - sungyeol!centric, l/krystal, sungyeol/krystal - pg
3472w~
his best friend and his first love. it's almost kind of perfect, really.
a/n: for wintercreamed, love you and i hope you enjoy reading it as much as i did writing it ♥
His head hurts. Sungyeol wants to drive in peace and quiet but Myungsoo and Soojung are in the back still laughing about some tourists at the last rest stop that didn't know how to read the gas pump sign and he doesn't know what he's doing, then, in between the two of them, an awkward third wheel out.
His best friend and his first love. It's almost kind of perfect, really.
Myungsoo is the conceited asshole you meet when you're a kid. Sungyeol doesn't really remember the quiet child in the back of the daycare, playing all alone with the Legos and Hot Wheels, but his mom would always bring it up during their high school days and Sungyeol just guesses Myungsoo's been around forever.
There's no surprise, at least, to why no one wanted to play with him. He's a pretentious douche and Sungyeol kind of loves it, the way his best friend doesn't know when to shut up and pretends like he knows what he's saying and doesn't comfort Sungyeol but tells him to suck it up instead because if nothing else, they've got each other. Myungsoo is a complete jerk and he thinks he likes that better than a sappy friend who is looking for something out of life.
They've got no ambition, but they've got each other. Sungyeol likes to remember when that was enough.
It's nine o'clock when her whining finally gets to him and Sungyeol pulls over for food. They've got snacks piled in the backseat of the car but Soojung wants real food - a meal, sungyeol, i need something to eat - and so they stop at some fast food place and order burgers for five to split between three.
Myungsoo and Soojung have the bigger cup of fries in between them, ketchup on his side because Soojung doesn't like tomatoes. Sungyeol sits with his legs propped up on the passenger seat, and the radio is playing some trashy pop song that's come on three times in the past two hours. He hums the song through bites of food and Soojung smiles. "What?"
"We should try car karaoke."
"What is that?"
Soojung gets up from her seat and leans over him to turn up the radio, the lyrics words they all know. She sits back down after the volume is at an uncomfortably high level and picks her burger back up, taking a bite before bursting out into a mouthful of song, and it's kind of gross.
Myungsoo stares at her for a second before he bursts into laughter, and Sungyeol doesn't know what's more sickening, the bits of french fry stuck in between Myungsoo's teeth or the burger morsels falling from Soojung's mouth as she sings. "You guys are disgusting," he murmurs, and she hits the back of his seat harshly. He winces but it's not like she notices.
"That's only because you're not joining along!" she yells, and he can't help but smile a little bit.
By the third song, Sungyeol is kind of singing along with them and his voice sucks, though Myungsoo's isn't really much better and Soojung's the only good singer out of the trio. Road side singers - Sungyeol likes the idea. SMS, maybe, because Soojung is always first, Myungsoo is in the middle of it, and Sungyeol was always lagging behind.
October 14. Sungyeol remembers the day because it was exactly ten days before her sixteenth birthday, and he'd found her sitting in the courtyard crying alone during lunchtime because my sweet 16 is going to be so fucking empty! She's got a heavy mouth for such a pretty girl. He likes her, then.
Sungyeol holds her hand and he doesn't know her name just then, because they don't have any classes together until sixth period and she's the new girl in town. Perfect Jung Soojung, a name that fits the equally perfect face.
It's an ugly threesome, after that.
Sungyeol and Myungsoo were forever and always and Soojung is the scissors to the rope that they've spent their whole life hanging on to. She's also the glue, or the tape, or the bandage, whatever it is that sticks the two back together after tearing them apart and making sure to place herself in between.
She's a whole different story, Jung Soojung. She isn't like either of them, because Sungyeol is brooding and Myungsoo can only be described as an ass and Soojung loves them both anyways, with her spirited personality that fits all the letters of the alphabet. She's the extra piece they didn't need but cram in anyways - but Sungyeol is the one to fall out anyways.
Soojung proposes sleeping outside for the night. Myungsoo grumbles because he hates the outdoors, but Sungyeol loves everything that Soojung loves and two against three wins. "I should count as three people," Myungsoo says and Soojung snorts, hitting him in the stomach - why, because you're a fatass?
The bantering never stops and Sungyeol ends up setting the sleeping stuff out all by himself, smoothing out all the blankets and making sure to put extra bedding in the middle.
He lays on one side, cold and uninviting, waiting for Myungsoo and Soojung to shut up their meaningless fighting and join him - but they sound happy, on their side of whatever universe they're trapped inside of, and the other part of him wants to lay there by himself and listen to his two favorite people favor each other over him. The bitterness is nice, but Sungyeol doesn't really know why.
Soojung falls to the makeshift bed first, settling in the middle (always) and Myungsoo on her remaining side. She points at the stars and draws shapes that don't quite fit, and Myungsoo is complaining but they are all empty words.
Sungyeol finds himself staring at Soojung's flawless profile, her eyes glowing and her hair a black waterfall in contrast to her pale skin. Aren't the stars beautiful, Sungyeol? and he says yes because she is. She's beautiful.
Sungyeol doesn't know what they are, then, but it makes sense. Maybe it's right, maybe not. He can't tell anymore.
The winter of junior year welcomes him harshly. Myungsoo is a little too happy and Soojung is unnaturally shy and quiet and we're dating happens the second to last week of November.
He smiles, at first. Sungyeol smiles at most of the stuff Myungsoo says because Myungsoo's sort of an idiot, but it doesn't hit him until a lot later. At the time, he just smiles, and then laughs awkwardly, and since when has this been going on? Myungsoo thinks its alright after that and Soojung does too, and much later she just plays along even after she figures out the truth and the deed has already been done.
Sungyeol guesses he was always kind of bad at hiding his feelings - but it's not like he's gonna get anywhere in the middle of the night, whispering soft promises to Soojung that he thinks he would be much better off than Myungsoo.
Then again, it's not like he was any good at expressing his feelings either.
It's cold in the morning. Sungyeol wakes up and the blanket is only covering half of him, most of it piled on Soojung who is still shivering. Her head is buried underneath Myungsoo's shoulder, his other arm draped over her waist, and Sungyeol doesn't know what he's doing there - so he leaves, and makes sure to tuck Soojung in in the process.
It is seven in the morning, according to the car clock, and they are almost out of gas.
He sits in the driver's seat for a little bit, feeling gross because he hasn't brushed his teeth yet and the car smells of outdoors, and finally Sungyeol just turns on the car because it's too cold to be sitting there alone.
"Were you planning on leaving without us?"
Sungyeol turns to where the voice is coming from and Soojung is settling into the passenger seat, rubbing her arms and staring at him through barely opened eyes. There's a bit of dried drool at one corner of her mouth and the back of her hair is up in a mess and he likes her humanness, how she's just like the rest of them.
"Pretty much. You guys looked comfortable there anyways."
She snorts and punches him in the arm lightly, jerk. He shrugs and then it goes silent for a moment, and it is somewhat relaxing, the lack of obnoxious bickering.
"Hey, Soojung," he suddenly says, and she turns towards him. "Did you just leave Myungsoo out there, by himself?"
Her eyes widen and they both get out of the car to see Myungsoo rolling around in the dirt, the sheets long behind him. Sungyeol pulls him up from the ground and picks out the rock embedded in his shirt, and Myungsoo blinks slowly, turning to look at him. Soojung is off to the side, picking up the blankets, and Myungsoo frowns. "What happened?"
"Nothing," they both say simultaneously, and he glances at them strangely. Sungyeol smiles at him awkwardly and now Soojung is laughing, and Myungsoo looks utterly confused.
"I'm not gonna ask," he sighs. Sungyeol didn't know if he had a response anyways.
Sungyeol doesn't know what exactly he likes about Soojung. He just knows that he likes her, and he likes her a lot.
She's the shadowy sort of flawless, washed out skin and dark hair and piercing eyes with empty circles underneath, pale lips and the haunting frame of a confused girl. She's profane, and irritatingly loud around the two of them, and she's got a mixed personality for every day of the week. Her laughter is beautiful, but she looks just as stunning with tears in her eyes and no words to say. She has ambitious dreams but little hope and so much more worth than any of them without a path to follow.
Sungyeol doesn't know what exactly he likes about Soojung. He just knows that he likes her.
They stop at a scarcely breathing diner for lunch later that day. Neither of them say anything, but Sungyeol can hear Myungsoo's stomach growling and Soojung licks her lips with each food related billboard, and he's not a complete idiot.
There are only two waitresses, one of which who looks hopelessly bored and the other filing her nails and not paying attention to the only customers in the restaurant. Sungyeol stops at a booth in the back and Soojung files into one end, Myungsoo right after her, and Sungyeol relaxes on the other side, alone as always.
The bored waitress comes by after ten minutes, scribbling down all their orders without saying even a word of greeting.
At least the food comes quickly.
It tastes kind of gross but Myungsoo and Soojung are evidently too hungry to notice, pigging out on overcooked burgers and fries that are too soggy for Sungyeol's taste. It's the longest either of them have ever gone without talking, ignoring the few hours of sleep they allow him every night, and he grins. "Maybe I should starve you guys more often."
Myungsoo glares at him. "I said maybe."
"I would - totally - not be - eating this - if I wasn't - so hungry," Soojung says in between bites of french fries, almost going as far as dipping it into ketchup before she decides she isn't that hungry.
Sungyeol raises an eyebrow but she isn't looking at him. "Sure," he says, and Myungsoo snorts. Soojung doesn't notice.
They stay at the diner for two and half hours, all of them ordering seconds and Soojung going as far as getting dessert, a melting sundae that looks bitter and according to her, doesn't taste any better than the food. They crawl into the car when it's finally paid for and agonize over their stretched stomachs in the parking lot for another half hour, when she turns on the radio, almost proposing another game of car karaoke until Sungyeol grabs her hands from the volume dial and saying he doesn't want either of them throwing up in his car. Myungsoo is too full and so Soojung gives in, and they both fall asleep at around five o'clock, satisfied and in each other's arms.
Sungyeol turns the radio on, and they are playing some sadistic ballad. It fits the mood.
Once upon a time, Sungyeol was alright with their relationship. He didn't mind being a third wheel, being in love with his best friend's girlfriend and being best friends with his one-sided love - none of that really mattered, because they were both there and at least there was that.
They were at Myungsoo's house. His mom was cooking lunch and Sungyeol had gone to get drinks for the three of them, only to walk into Myungsoo's room and seeing his two favorite people in the world, in love.
It wasn't anything explicit, just giggling and her sitting in his arms, Myungsoo kissing her lightly once before she pulled away and laughed, soft whispers and the image of perfect lovers. He was like an intruder, Sungyeol, to what had become their love, what was so built and so flawless, and none of what he was a part of.
He leaves without saying anything and neither of them ever noticed.
Sungyeol thinks that might have been when he wasn't okay anymore.
He pulls over at ten in the night because it starts to rain. Sungyeol isn't really tired, but the roads are too slippery for him to drive in such darkness, and Myungsoo and Soojung are half asleep anyways.
Sungyeol stretches his legs out on to the passenger seat and turns the radio on, volume low so he can barely make out the song playing on the radio, a pop song they were listening to just earlier that morning. He hums along to the bits of the chorus that he knows and does the hand motions to the bridge, and then Soojung's voice is in his ear, suddenly.
"You're a good singer, you know."
His hand flies to his chest and he turns to look to the side, and she's got one hand over her mouth, giggling. "Holy shit, you scared the hell out of me." Sungyeol takes a deep breath and his eyes fall shut, heart beating erratically. "What the hell. When did you wake up."
"I haven't really been sleeping," she mumbles as she climbs over to the passenger seat, Sungyeol pulling his legs away so she can sit down. "Not tired, I guess."
"Myungsoo's arm isn't comfortable enough?" Sungyeol responds, and he thinks it might have come out kind of harshly because Soojung raises an eyebrow, shuffling on the seat awkwardly.
"What?"
"Sorry, that came out wrong-"
Soojung sighs. "You don't have to be so obvious, you know, Sungyeol," and then leans over so her hand is on his, cold and stinging. She toys with his fingers for a second, and the smile on her face is rugged and acidic, like she's known it all along. And she has, she says. "Why didn't you ever make a move on me?"
"What?" It's his turn to pretend.
"We could have made a better pair, I think." She drops his hand, and the sudden lack is freezing. "You understand me more than he does," Soojung sits up on the seat, "and you comfort me better than anyone I've known," her lips are next to his ear now, "and you love me."
Sungyeol's breath is slowly dying inside of him. "You don't know that."
"Why not? Because you're too scared to show your feelings?" He can feel her spreading lips on his skin, as she falls closer to his lips, centimeters away. "It's okay, I don't mind."
Soojung's lips are soft and lovely on his, finally, and they taste sweet and bitter, like cherry cough drops. His hands are on the back of her neck, pulling her close and keeping her there, and it hurts the way she slowly breaks him, but he loves her anyways, even with Myungsoo sitting in the back, oblivious and evidently so much better than him.
She is the first one to pull away. "I told you."
"I never said you were wrong."
"But you never said you loved me, either."
Sungyeol doesn't say anything, and she crawls back into Myungsoo's arms long after his lips have stopped burning. He guesses that was always how it would be, too.
It rains all the next day too, a light drizzle in the morning transformed into flooding waters by lunch time. Myungsoo and Soojung woke up once in the morning for a quick breakfast before passing out once again, and Sungyeol doesn't have the heart to wake either of them back up.
He turns the radio up slightly and the same pop song is playing as days before, and he thinks of car karaoke and their ugly trio. It's a frighteningly beautiful image.
Her lips are still vivid on his, placid and burning, and Sungyeol reaches up once to feel where she had pressed her mouth only a night before. He doesn't know what to think of Soojung, and her flawless face, and who exactly she is trying to confuse - him, Myungsoo, herself, they've all become one by now.
Myungsoo's breathing deepens and Soojung instinctively curls into his arm, burying her head into his shoulder.
Sungyeol glances at them from the rearview mirror and the innocence of such a broken pair is beautiful. He would be envious if they weren't the people he loved most (but that, too, is no guarantee).
"I've got to pee."
It's the first thing she's said to him in the past two days, Sungyeol acknowledging her with a nod and pulling over to the nearest gas station, two miles away, and she's still bitter and broken.
Myungsoo yawns from the back when Soojung gets out of the car. "Awake?"
"Yeah, but I feel like shit." He smiles drunkenly at Sungyeol through the rearview mirror and sits up, resting his head against the shoulder of the passenger seat. Sungyeol turns to look at him and smiles awkwardly. "How are you holding up?"
"Fine, I guess?"
"No, I mean with Soojung, and all."
He feels bile rise in the back of his throat and blinks furiously - he'd almost forgotten about it, if anything - but Myungsoo looks fine. Sad, a little bit, he could say. "What do you mean, with Soojung?"
"I know what happened the other night. I was just wondering if you were okay after all that."
"Wait, man-"
Myungsoo reaches over to pat him on the leg, hand lingering like he wants to say something more but doesn't really know how. "You don't have to apologize, or anything. We could fight this out or something douchey like that, if you want, but we both like her and it's either her or us, if that's the way you wanna go."
Sungyeol doesn't say anything.
"We're best friends. I know you wouldn't ruin that for any kind of relationship."
Soojung's walking back, now, holding a soda in one hand and a pack of M&M's in the other. Sungyeol loves M&M's, and she holds up the pack when she sees him, smiling. He smiles back at her. "You guys look better together, anyways," Sungyeol finally responds. "I'm too good for all of this."
Myungsoo kicks the back of his seat, and Soojung slides into the back, then, what's going on here? and he tries not to fall in love again.
They were still wearing their graduations robes hours after the ceremony, Soojung's hat on her head, Sungyeol's tucked under his arm, and Myungsoo's lost amongst the rest of them. Only her mom was home, Sooyeon off on her travels and her dad working, and it had taken them all less than minutes to change into their bathing suits and jump into the pool, laughing and celebrating because that era of life was finally done with.
Her mom brings out watermelon, and later barbecue, and Soojung's got this old set of water guns and foam tubes, pool accessories of the sorts, of which begins endless banter and kids play.
They split into two teams, Myungsoo and Soojung on the shallow end, Sungyeol on the deep end, and he's winning but it isn't by that much of a victory until Soojung meets him in the middle when Myungsoo goes off for drinks and whispers something about how they can still win this together, and back then he didn't know what she was talking about but now Sungyeol wonders if she loved him like he still loves her.
Myungsoo comes back and they both turn against him, but in the end it's all three of them together.
(myungsoo and sungyeol, forever and always, soojung a mere bystander that had suddenly intruded so fittingly.
and that's how it will always be.)
requests of the day
otp
chanyeol/seohyun
minho/krystal
jaejoong/jessica
infinite/f(x) - sungyeol!centric, l/krystal, sungyeol/krystal - pg
3472w~
his best friend and his first love. it's almost kind of perfect, really.
a/n: for wintercreamed, love you and i hope you enjoy reading it as much as i did writing it ♥
His head hurts. Sungyeol wants to drive in peace and quiet but Myungsoo and Soojung are in the back still laughing about some tourists at the last rest stop that didn't know how to read the gas pump sign and he doesn't know what he's doing, then, in between the two of them, an awkward third wheel out.
His best friend and his first love. It's almost kind of perfect, really.
Myungsoo is the conceited asshole you meet when you're a kid. Sungyeol doesn't really remember the quiet child in the back of the daycare, playing all alone with the Legos and Hot Wheels, but his mom would always bring it up during their high school days and Sungyeol just guesses Myungsoo's been around forever.
There's no surprise, at least, to why no one wanted to play with him. He's a pretentious douche and Sungyeol kind of loves it, the way his best friend doesn't know when to shut up and pretends like he knows what he's saying and doesn't comfort Sungyeol but tells him to suck it up instead because if nothing else, they've got each other. Myungsoo is a complete jerk and he thinks he likes that better than a sappy friend who is looking for something out of life.
They've got no ambition, but they've got each other. Sungyeol likes to remember when that was enough.
It's nine o'clock when her whining finally gets to him and Sungyeol pulls over for food. They've got snacks piled in the backseat of the car but Soojung wants real food - a meal, sungyeol, i need something to eat - and so they stop at some fast food place and order burgers for five to split between three.
Myungsoo and Soojung have the bigger cup of fries in between them, ketchup on his side because Soojung doesn't like tomatoes. Sungyeol sits with his legs propped up on the passenger seat, and the radio is playing some trashy pop song that's come on three times in the past two hours. He hums the song through bites of food and Soojung smiles. "What?"
"We should try car karaoke."
"What is that?"
Soojung gets up from her seat and leans over him to turn up the radio, the lyrics words they all know. She sits back down after the volume is at an uncomfortably high level and picks her burger back up, taking a bite before bursting out into a mouthful of song, and it's kind of gross.
Myungsoo stares at her for a second before he bursts into laughter, and Sungyeol doesn't know what's more sickening, the bits of french fry stuck in between Myungsoo's teeth or the burger morsels falling from Soojung's mouth as she sings. "You guys are disgusting," he murmurs, and she hits the back of his seat harshly. He winces but it's not like she notices.
"That's only because you're not joining along!" she yells, and he can't help but smile a little bit.
By the third song, Sungyeol is kind of singing along with them and his voice sucks, though Myungsoo's isn't really much better and Soojung's the only good singer out of the trio. Road side singers - Sungyeol likes the idea. SMS, maybe, because Soojung is always first, Myungsoo is in the middle of it, and Sungyeol was always lagging behind.
October 14. Sungyeol remembers the day because it was exactly ten days before her sixteenth birthday, and he'd found her sitting in the courtyard crying alone during lunchtime because my sweet 16 is going to be so fucking empty! She's got a heavy mouth for such a pretty girl. He likes her, then.
Sungyeol holds her hand and he doesn't know her name just then, because they don't have any classes together until sixth period and she's the new girl in town. Perfect Jung Soojung, a name that fits the equally perfect face.
It's an ugly threesome, after that.
Sungyeol and Myungsoo were forever and always and Soojung is the scissors to the rope that they've spent their whole life hanging on to. She's also the glue, or the tape, or the bandage, whatever it is that sticks the two back together after tearing them apart and making sure to place herself in between.
She's a whole different story, Jung Soojung. She isn't like either of them, because Sungyeol is brooding and Myungsoo can only be described as an ass and Soojung loves them both anyways, with her spirited personality that fits all the letters of the alphabet. She's the extra piece they didn't need but cram in anyways - but Sungyeol is the one to fall out anyways.
Soojung proposes sleeping outside for the night. Myungsoo grumbles because he hates the outdoors, but Sungyeol loves everything that Soojung loves and two against three wins. "I should count as three people," Myungsoo says and Soojung snorts, hitting him in the stomach - why, because you're a fatass?
The bantering never stops and Sungyeol ends up setting the sleeping stuff out all by himself, smoothing out all the blankets and making sure to put extra bedding in the middle.
He lays on one side, cold and uninviting, waiting for Myungsoo and Soojung to shut up their meaningless fighting and join him - but they sound happy, on their side of whatever universe they're trapped inside of, and the other part of him wants to lay there by himself and listen to his two favorite people favor each other over him. The bitterness is nice, but Sungyeol doesn't really know why.
Soojung falls to the makeshift bed first, settling in the middle (always) and Myungsoo on her remaining side. She points at the stars and draws shapes that don't quite fit, and Myungsoo is complaining but they are all empty words.
Sungyeol finds himself staring at Soojung's flawless profile, her eyes glowing and her hair a black waterfall in contrast to her pale skin. Aren't the stars beautiful, Sungyeol? and he says yes because she is. She's beautiful.
Sungyeol doesn't know what they are, then, but it makes sense. Maybe it's right, maybe not. He can't tell anymore.
The winter of junior year welcomes him harshly. Myungsoo is a little too happy and Soojung is unnaturally shy and quiet and we're dating happens the second to last week of November.
He smiles, at first. Sungyeol smiles at most of the stuff Myungsoo says because Myungsoo's sort of an idiot, but it doesn't hit him until a lot later. At the time, he just smiles, and then laughs awkwardly, and since when has this been going on? Myungsoo thinks its alright after that and Soojung does too, and much later she just plays along even after she figures out the truth and the deed has already been done.
Sungyeol guesses he was always kind of bad at hiding his feelings - but it's not like he's gonna get anywhere in the middle of the night, whispering soft promises to Soojung that he thinks he would be much better off than Myungsoo.
Then again, it's not like he was any good at expressing his feelings either.
It's cold in the morning. Sungyeol wakes up and the blanket is only covering half of him, most of it piled on Soojung who is still shivering. Her head is buried underneath Myungsoo's shoulder, his other arm draped over her waist, and Sungyeol doesn't know what he's doing there - so he leaves, and makes sure to tuck Soojung in in the process.
It is seven in the morning, according to the car clock, and they are almost out of gas.
He sits in the driver's seat for a little bit, feeling gross because he hasn't brushed his teeth yet and the car smells of outdoors, and finally Sungyeol just turns on the car because it's too cold to be sitting there alone.
"Were you planning on leaving without us?"
Sungyeol turns to where the voice is coming from and Soojung is settling into the passenger seat, rubbing her arms and staring at him through barely opened eyes. There's a bit of dried drool at one corner of her mouth and the back of her hair is up in a mess and he likes her humanness, how she's just like the rest of them.
"Pretty much. You guys looked comfortable there anyways."
She snorts and punches him in the arm lightly, jerk. He shrugs and then it goes silent for a moment, and it is somewhat relaxing, the lack of obnoxious bickering.
"Hey, Soojung," he suddenly says, and she turns towards him. "Did you just leave Myungsoo out there, by himself?"
Her eyes widen and they both get out of the car to see Myungsoo rolling around in the dirt, the sheets long behind him. Sungyeol pulls him up from the ground and picks out the rock embedded in his shirt, and Myungsoo blinks slowly, turning to look at him. Soojung is off to the side, picking up the blankets, and Myungsoo frowns. "What happened?"
"Nothing," they both say simultaneously, and he glances at them strangely. Sungyeol smiles at him awkwardly and now Soojung is laughing, and Myungsoo looks utterly confused.
"I'm not gonna ask," he sighs. Sungyeol didn't know if he had a response anyways.
Sungyeol doesn't know what exactly he likes about Soojung. He just knows that he likes her, and he likes her a lot.
She's the shadowy sort of flawless, washed out skin and dark hair and piercing eyes with empty circles underneath, pale lips and the haunting frame of a confused girl. She's profane, and irritatingly loud around the two of them, and she's got a mixed personality for every day of the week. Her laughter is beautiful, but she looks just as stunning with tears in her eyes and no words to say. She has ambitious dreams but little hope and so much more worth than any of them without a path to follow.
Sungyeol doesn't know what exactly he likes about Soojung. He just knows that he likes her.
They stop at a scarcely breathing diner for lunch later that day. Neither of them say anything, but Sungyeol can hear Myungsoo's stomach growling and Soojung licks her lips with each food related billboard, and he's not a complete idiot.
There are only two waitresses, one of which who looks hopelessly bored and the other filing her nails and not paying attention to the only customers in the restaurant. Sungyeol stops at a booth in the back and Soojung files into one end, Myungsoo right after her, and Sungyeol relaxes on the other side, alone as always.
The bored waitress comes by after ten minutes, scribbling down all their orders without saying even a word of greeting.
At least the food comes quickly.
It tastes kind of gross but Myungsoo and Soojung are evidently too hungry to notice, pigging out on overcooked burgers and fries that are too soggy for Sungyeol's taste. It's the longest either of them have ever gone without talking, ignoring the few hours of sleep they allow him every night, and he grins. "Maybe I should starve you guys more often."
Myungsoo glares at him. "I said maybe."
"I would - totally - not be - eating this - if I wasn't - so hungry," Soojung says in between bites of french fries, almost going as far as dipping it into ketchup before she decides she isn't that hungry.
Sungyeol raises an eyebrow but she isn't looking at him. "Sure," he says, and Myungsoo snorts. Soojung doesn't notice.
They stay at the diner for two and half hours, all of them ordering seconds and Soojung going as far as getting dessert, a melting sundae that looks bitter and according to her, doesn't taste any better than the food. They crawl into the car when it's finally paid for and agonize over their stretched stomachs in the parking lot for another half hour, when she turns on the radio, almost proposing another game of car karaoke until Sungyeol grabs her hands from the volume dial and saying he doesn't want either of them throwing up in his car. Myungsoo is too full and so Soojung gives in, and they both fall asleep at around five o'clock, satisfied and in each other's arms.
Sungyeol turns the radio on, and they are playing some sadistic ballad. It fits the mood.
Once upon a time, Sungyeol was alright with their relationship. He didn't mind being a third wheel, being in love with his best friend's girlfriend and being best friends with his one-sided love - none of that really mattered, because they were both there and at least there was that.
They were at Myungsoo's house. His mom was cooking lunch and Sungyeol had gone to get drinks for the three of them, only to walk into Myungsoo's room and seeing his two favorite people in the world, in love.
It wasn't anything explicit, just giggling and her sitting in his arms, Myungsoo kissing her lightly once before she pulled away and laughed, soft whispers and the image of perfect lovers. He was like an intruder, Sungyeol, to what had become their love, what was so built and so flawless, and none of what he was a part of.
He leaves without saying anything and neither of them ever noticed.
Sungyeol thinks that might have been when he wasn't okay anymore.
He pulls over at ten in the night because it starts to rain. Sungyeol isn't really tired, but the roads are too slippery for him to drive in such darkness, and Myungsoo and Soojung are half asleep anyways.
Sungyeol stretches his legs out on to the passenger seat and turns the radio on, volume low so he can barely make out the song playing on the radio, a pop song they were listening to just earlier that morning. He hums along to the bits of the chorus that he knows and does the hand motions to the bridge, and then Soojung's voice is in his ear, suddenly.
"You're a good singer, you know."
His hand flies to his chest and he turns to look to the side, and she's got one hand over her mouth, giggling. "Holy shit, you scared the hell out of me." Sungyeol takes a deep breath and his eyes fall shut, heart beating erratically. "What the hell. When did you wake up."
"I haven't really been sleeping," she mumbles as she climbs over to the passenger seat, Sungyeol pulling his legs away so she can sit down. "Not tired, I guess."
"Myungsoo's arm isn't comfortable enough?" Sungyeol responds, and he thinks it might have come out kind of harshly because Soojung raises an eyebrow, shuffling on the seat awkwardly.
"What?"
"Sorry, that came out wrong-"
Soojung sighs. "You don't have to be so obvious, you know, Sungyeol," and then leans over so her hand is on his, cold and stinging. She toys with his fingers for a second, and the smile on her face is rugged and acidic, like she's known it all along. And she has, she says. "Why didn't you ever make a move on me?"
"What?" It's his turn to pretend.
"We could have made a better pair, I think." She drops his hand, and the sudden lack is freezing. "You understand me more than he does," Soojung sits up on the seat, "and you comfort me better than anyone I've known," her lips are next to his ear now, "and you love me."
Sungyeol's breath is slowly dying inside of him. "You don't know that."
"Why not? Because you're too scared to show your feelings?" He can feel her spreading lips on his skin, as she falls closer to his lips, centimeters away. "It's okay, I don't mind."
Soojung's lips are soft and lovely on his, finally, and they taste sweet and bitter, like cherry cough drops. His hands are on the back of her neck, pulling her close and keeping her there, and it hurts the way she slowly breaks him, but he loves her anyways, even with Myungsoo sitting in the back, oblivious and evidently so much better than him.
She is the first one to pull away. "I told you."
"I never said you were wrong."
"But you never said you loved me, either."
Sungyeol doesn't say anything, and she crawls back into Myungsoo's arms long after his lips have stopped burning. He guesses that was always how it would be, too.
It rains all the next day too, a light drizzle in the morning transformed into flooding waters by lunch time. Myungsoo and Soojung woke up once in the morning for a quick breakfast before passing out once again, and Sungyeol doesn't have the heart to wake either of them back up.
He turns the radio up slightly and the same pop song is playing as days before, and he thinks of car karaoke and their ugly trio. It's a frighteningly beautiful image.
Her lips are still vivid on his, placid and burning, and Sungyeol reaches up once to feel where she had pressed her mouth only a night before. He doesn't know what to think of Soojung, and her flawless face, and who exactly she is trying to confuse - him, Myungsoo, herself, they've all become one by now.
Myungsoo's breathing deepens and Soojung instinctively curls into his arm, burying her head into his shoulder.
Sungyeol glances at them from the rearview mirror and the innocence of such a broken pair is beautiful. He would be envious if they weren't the people he loved most (but that, too, is no guarantee).
"I've got to pee."
It's the first thing she's said to him in the past two days, Sungyeol acknowledging her with a nod and pulling over to the nearest gas station, two miles away, and she's still bitter and broken.
Myungsoo yawns from the back when Soojung gets out of the car. "Awake?"
"Yeah, but I feel like shit." He smiles drunkenly at Sungyeol through the rearview mirror and sits up, resting his head against the shoulder of the passenger seat. Sungyeol turns to look at him and smiles awkwardly. "How are you holding up?"
"Fine, I guess?"
"No, I mean with Soojung, and all."
He feels bile rise in the back of his throat and blinks furiously - he'd almost forgotten about it, if anything - but Myungsoo looks fine. Sad, a little bit, he could say. "What do you mean, with Soojung?"
"I know what happened the other night. I was just wondering if you were okay after all that."
"Wait, man-"
Myungsoo reaches over to pat him on the leg, hand lingering like he wants to say something more but doesn't really know how. "You don't have to apologize, or anything. We could fight this out or something douchey like that, if you want, but we both like her and it's either her or us, if that's the way you wanna go."
Sungyeol doesn't say anything.
"We're best friends. I know you wouldn't ruin that for any kind of relationship."
Soojung's walking back, now, holding a soda in one hand and a pack of M&M's in the other. Sungyeol loves M&M's, and she holds up the pack when she sees him, smiling. He smiles back at her. "You guys look better together, anyways," Sungyeol finally responds. "I'm too good for all of this."
Myungsoo kicks the back of his seat, and Soojung slides into the back, then, what's going on here? and he tries not to fall in love again.
They were still wearing their graduations robes hours after the ceremony, Soojung's hat on her head, Sungyeol's tucked under his arm, and Myungsoo's lost amongst the rest of them. Only her mom was home, Sooyeon off on her travels and her dad working, and it had taken them all less than minutes to change into their bathing suits and jump into the pool, laughing and celebrating because that era of life was finally done with.
Her mom brings out watermelon, and later barbecue, and Soojung's got this old set of water guns and foam tubes, pool accessories of the sorts, of which begins endless banter and kids play.
They split into two teams, Myungsoo and Soojung on the shallow end, Sungyeol on the deep end, and he's winning but it isn't by that much of a victory until Soojung meets him in the middle when Myungsoo goes off for drinks and whispers something about how they can still win this together, and back then he didn't know what she was talking about but now Sungyeol wonders if she loved him like he still loves her.
Myungsoo comes back and they both turn against him, but in the end it's all three of them together.
(myungsoo and sungyeol, forever and always, soojung a mere bystander that had suddenly intruded so fittingly.
and that's how it will always be.)
requests of the day
otp
chanyeol/seohyun
minho/krystal
jaejoong/jessica