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i am full of suck today. i didn't go out last night, even though i had been looking forward to it, because all i can do anymore is tread water to keep up. i feel sick all the time, and i never seem to get enough sleep. so i stayed home last night and slept, and i still managed to be two hours late to work today. granted, i didn't oversleep, i looked at next week's schedule by mistake, but still. these are things that sarah didn't use to do. i used to be fun. i used to go out and see people. i skipped out on the last three concerts i wanted to see as well, not because i had to work, but because i was too tired/ill. is it worth this to quit smoking?