Deja Vu
A couple of months ago I have a problem with one of my brothers because of something I told our mom.
Today things seems to be repeating again. Damn how I hate that.
This morning while eating a late breakfast, my dad sat with me and showed me a car advertisement he received on the mail. He wanted me to see the car he wants to buy my younger brother David, he has a KIA Rio right now. I wasn't very happy about it because we are in a very harsh economic situation at the moment, so bad that my parents are thinking on file bankruptcy. Still my dad wanted to go see the car and make a deal by exchanging the KIA for the new car. My parents were thinking about doing it with out David knowing about it, kind of a surprise, and also because they didn't wanted my brother to get any false hope in case the deal wasn't made.
So when I was leaving for work today, Julian my other brother the one I have the problem with, arrived and immediately text me to ask where were our parents. So I wrote back telling him they were in a car dealer and what they were doing. and he told me that he doubted that David was going to like that very much because of what he bought for the KIA, he recently bought speakers for the car, and my parents didn't know about them. So what did I did........................ I told my mom to first talk with David if they were going to change the car. She asked why, and I told her, then my dad called Julian to ask about the speakers, and Julian then texted me mad saying "Why won't you just shut up"
Now this is not the bad part, I mean I can give a f*** about that. Come on what is so special about some car speakers, I know that my parents won't like them very much because they don't like us to put loud music in the car. But seriously things weren't going to get bad with my parents because of that.
The bad part and the thing that hurt me the most was what Julian said to me then. here is the txt conversation.
Type your cut contents here.
Julian: Dude why won't you just shut up
Me: what?
Julian: How did dad found out about the speaker system.
Me: I told mom, because if what you say about David is true, then I don't want my dad to buy a car and then show it to David to have David then angry with him. Hell no I don't want to see my dad sad if that happens.
Julian: Ok bro that shows how much I know David don't you see that he is my little brother, I even help him buy that system. Plus we don't have money to spare right now Dad is without a job, and Mom is working cleaning houses.
OMG what I felt at that moment was a mix of pure anger, God I swear my blood was boiling at that moment. I was so upsed I ended up locked in one of the bathrooms at work. And then it hit me, a wave of sorrow so big I started to cry. Me crying, yeah right, I don't cry easily, i don't let what others say about me get to me. But today, today I felt like he was saying that David was his little brother but not mine. That he knew him more that I do, and thats not true. But god damn it it hurt. I'm very protective of my family, no one absolutely no one has the right to touch them, much less my brothers, because they are my two little brothers and I want to protect them.
God I'm crying again.....
So when I was in the bathroom crying like and idiot, I text him back
Type your cut contents here.
Me: What did you try to mean by that? Just remember where are my parents are putting their money right now (my account in case the bank try to take it away with the bankruptcy). Don't think I'm a fool who doesn't know what is happening. And David is also my brother don't you dare forget about that.
Julian: So why do you want to buy a new car that we don't need?
Me: Don't be an idiot. I have never say I want them to buy a new car. I even told my dad not to because we don't need it. But you know what go and ask around before you point fingers blaming others for something they are not responsible for.
That was basically the end, because I was way to mad to continue, plus I needed to work.
Latter in the evening he text me again apologizing for everything he said. Some how I don't think he knows that what hurt me the most was the little brother comment. He thinks I was mostly mad, because he was accusing me of wanting to buy a new car. Unfortunately, I understand why the idiot was so agitated with all the car deal. He is worried about our situation. I am too, I just don't let it get to me that much.
I haven't personally talk to him jet, I'm still feeling way to raw about what he say earlier today. Probably tomorrow morning I will be better. Right now I hate him for making me cry, even if he doesn't know about it.