(no subject)
Trying to quit smoking again.
VERY hard.
So then I thought I was trying to "cut down."
Cutting down means smoking a lot when I'm at work to "catch up" for not being able to smoke around the ones I don't want to smoke around.
It's not that I can't smoke around them. I mean, I CAN... but damn it! They don't like it.
Hell, I don't even like it.
But you really get used to it. And being used to something means you like it because you don't want to get used to not being used to it.
So what I'm saying is that I don't want to do this for the rest of my life. It's starting to become embarrassing in some situations. It's a hassle to "have" to buy them and take time to smoke them. And it makes me not smell like a coconut which is a big bummer.
It's bad for my skin and for my lungs... my voice is getting raspy (which would only be good if I could sing some soul music or rock or something). It leads to heart disease... uhh... gee, what else?
No one ever said quitting was easy - that's why this is my third try.
It's funny though, each time I try I get better at it! Like I've only smoked 3 today. And I bought tea tree oil tooth picks to chew on.
But sometimes when I go a few hours without one, I breath in real deep and just think of smoke. It doesn't sound that tastey... and it's not really... it's more the the feeling of it all, and the habit... and my mouth getting tingly... filling my lungs up with some super crazy shit!!
Oh my stars. Cut out me lungs.
VERY hard.
So then I thought I was trying to "cut down."
Cutting down means smoking a lot when I'm at work to "catch up" for not being able to smoke around the ones I don't want to smoke around.
It's not that I can't smoke around them. I mean, I CAN... but damn it! They don't like it.
Hell, I don't even like it.
But you really get used to it. And being used to something means you like it because you don't want to get used to not being used to it.
So what I'm saying is that I don't want to do this for the rest of my life. It's starting to become embarrassing in some situations. It's a hassle to "have" to buy them and take time to smoke them. And it makes me not smell like a coconut which is a big bummer.
It's bad for my skin and for my lungs... my voice is getting raspy (which would only be good if I could sing some soul music or rock or something). It leads to heart disease... uhh... gee, what else?
No one ever said quitting was easy - that's why this is my third try.
It's funny though, each time I try I get better at it! Like I've only smoked 3 today. And I bought tea tree oil tooth picks to chew on.
But sometimes when I go a few hours without one, I breath in real deep and just think of smoke. It doesn't sound that tastey... and it's not really... it's more the the feeling of it all, and the habit... and my mouth getting tingly... filling my lungs up with some super crazy shit!!
Oh my stars. Cut out me lungs.