There is something to say about bittersweet moments,
I know this because people are always saying things about them. This is one of mine.
I have a habit of pretending that the real problems that life has set in front of me to solve don't really exist. That they are just a construct of my 'point of view' or current frame of mind or some sort of phrase that means my current interpretation of the world and what that means to me. Well, I put it off. Those problems are very real and they are in my way. So here is where my clever trick leads. Eventually, the deadline is staring me down. I've got to do something, now. Well, guess what, I don't do anything. ... yeah! nothing. So here it comes, its overwhelming and there is nothing I can do about it. let me repeat that. There is nothing I can do about it. If there IS nothing I can do about it, I don't have to pretend the problem doesn't exist. At once there is relief mixed in with a pile of "oh fuck what did I get myself in to, this is going to take twice as long to sort out than if I had just done something about this an an appropriate time". One of those is bitter and the other is sweet.
I have a habit of pretending that the real problems that life has set in front of me to solve don't really exist. That they are just a construct of my 'point of view' or current frame of mind or some sort of phrase that means my current interpretation of the world and what that means to me. Well, I put it off. Those problems are very real and they are in my way. So here is where my clever trick leads. Eventually, the deadline is staring me down. I've got to do something, now. Well, guess what, I don't do anything. ... yeah! nothing. So here it comes, its overwhelming and there is nothing I can do about it. let me repeat that. There is nothing I can do about it. If there IS nothing I can do about it, I don't have to pretend the problem doesn't exist. At once there is relief mixed in with a pile of "oh fuck what did I get myself in to, this is going to take twice as long to sort out than if I had just done something about this an an appropriate time". One of those is bitter and the other is sweet.