???????????????????????????????????????????????
my mom's sick, and i hope she get's better soon. she has the flu, which is particularlly icky sticky sick-y. my stomach is making weird noises, and i feel like my head had something important in it but is too full of unimportant things zooming around that it just got bumped out of the way. so i'm feeling really flustered and disapointed and kind of stupid. just a very self-hating day inside. i hate those. very confused about a great many things and people. maybe i'll go make a colorful poster to organize my anxieties like lauren suggested. yes.