Fic: Forty or Fifty
Fic: Forty or Fifty
Disclaimer: Sometimes I think this show was created just for me, but alas, still not mine.
Rating/warnings: M for sex.
Pairings: James/Logan
Notes: Technically speaking, this is (really, extremely) belated birthdayfic for jblostfan16, who asked for domestic James/Logan. I hope this suffices (and I hope you feel better soon, bb). ♥ And as always, enormous thanks to lielabell for beta reading and making this roughly a gazillion times better.
Summary: A screw up in communicating nearly ruins James and Logan's anniversary. (Futurefic.)
By the time James' plane touched down at LAX, his brain was beating with a steady rhythm of Logan, sex, sleep. Logan, sex, sleep. Logan...
He grabbed his carryon from the overhead, grateful the label had coughed up enough money to get him priority seating -- which included priority exiting. He winked at the flight attendant who held the door, then checked his phone as he walked, looking for a text from Logan that said where he was. Nothing yet -- maybe he'd actually gotten off the plane so quickly Logan hadn't even had a chance to send it yet.
He set his phone to vibrate, since he might not hear over the noise of the airport, and pushed his way through the crowd towards the baggage claim, keeping his eyes peeled even though there was no way Logan could have gotten back here unless he bought a ticket. Which he wouldn't have. Probably.
Not unless he was feeling romantic, anyway, and decided he wanted to greet James with a surprise kiss or something. Maybe if he couldn't stand to be away from James for any longer than he had to, even if it was only five more minutes...
Okay, that wasn't going to happen, if for no reason other than the fact that James was still closeted to the world at large, so Logan couldn't kiss him in public. But it was a nice fantasy.
Though, after four months of being too busy on tour to jump a flight home, and Logan being too busy with his medical internship to grab a flight out to James, James was a little sick of fantasies. Sick of fantasies and talking on the phone, of video chats and texting. Those things were fine, part of the whole long-distance gig, but after four months James was so, so ready for the real thing.
Logan, sex, sleep.
He crossed the security barrier and stood on his tiptoes, trying to search out Logan in the crowd of people waiting. He couldn't spot him, and thanks to his travel get-up (a sweatshirt with the hood pulled up, sunglasses, nothing too distinct) he wasn't exactly eye-catching himself. But Logan would probably find him anyway.
He ducked away from a photographer, looking around to see if any celebrities were milling about, and nudged his way up to the baggage claim before it even started spinning. He tried to find Logan in the crowd again, couldn't spot him, and as the claim grinded to life he grabbed his phone. No missed texts or calls -- maybe Logan was stuck in traffic?
He dashed off at baggage claim where u at? even though he knew Logan hated it when he didn't use full words in text messages. Served him right for not being on time. Then he turned his attention back to the baggage that was now circling, not wanting to miss his stuff and have to wait here even longer. It was easy to spot, since he'd tied a purple bandana around the handle as way to tell it apart from the million other boring black bags.
His phone started ringing as he hauled the bag off the track. He picked it up, mumbled, "One sec," and nudged his way out of the crowd of people waiting for their stuff. Once he'd gotten a few inches of breathing room, he said, "Sorry, okay, I'm back. Where are you?"
"Where am... where are you?"
"At the baggage claim." He craned his neck, searching for Logan. "I don't see you anywhere, where --"
"The baggage claim?" Logan repeated. His voice sounded weird, high and squeaky, like it always did when he was freaking out. "The baggage claim at LAX?"
"Uh, yeah? You... you aren't here?"
Logan swallowed audibly. "James, what weekend is it?"
"What?"
"What weekend --"
"Babe, you are working too hard if you don't know --"
"Shit, shit!" The sound of something crashing to the ground filtered through the phone, followed by, "Ow, son of a... just, fuck me. It's the nineteenth, isn't it?"
"Yeah," James said. "And fucking you is definitely on the night's to-do list, so where the hell are you?"
Logan sighed, a long, heavy, labored breath. "I'm at the hospital. I screwed my schedule up. Like, a lot."
James' heart began to sink. He leaned against the wall, keeping one hand on his luggage. "Meaning?"
"Meaning I switched shifts to get next weekend off. You said you couldn't get this weekend free --"
"Yeah, not at first, but I talked Kelly into it, remember? I told you about the switch three weeks ago." And getting the weekend switched had been damn hard, too. He'd had to beg and wheedle and double up all kinds of other, stupid events, just to manage it. It had been a hard sell to Kelly even then, but he hadn't stopped pleading until she managed it for him.
Because it was his and Logan's second anniversary.
"You did? Oh, fuck, you did. I forgot to write it down and... god damn it, I forgot and I rearranged my whole schedule so I could get next weekend off."
"Oh. Well that... sucks," James said. Which was putting it mildly, because after four months, all he freaking wanted was a weekend with Logan. But he continued, trying to keep some of the annoyance out of his voice, "I wish you were here, but I'll just get a cab home. I'll see you tonight."
"Oh god, I'm so sorry --"
"It's not that big a --"
"Yes. It is." Logan groaned again. "I was so desperate to get next weekend off that I agreed to work all weekend. I'm pulling a 24 today, I won't even be home until tomorrow afternoon. And then I've got a double on Sunday."
"You... what?" Now James let himself sound kind of upset, because he knew what Logan was like after a full 24-hour shift. He wouldn't get much sleep in the hospital's on-call room, and he'd be dead on his feet by the end. All he ever wanted to do after working that long was collapse... and then he wouldn't even be around Sunday. It wasn't like they'd been planning something big for their anniversary, but after four months apart, all James really wanted was some time together. And now there was no way to get that.
Fuck.
"I can't believe I got the dates wrong," Logan said. "But I've had next weekend on my calendar since your tour dates were finalized. I just didn't realize..."
"The shifts you took, can you just... switch back?" James asked.
"I wish. But it's Greg's honeymoon, he wanted the extra day on Sunday and won't be home, and Suzanne is visiting her mom in Oregon, so..."
"Is there anyone else who can take them?"
"If there was, do you think I'd still be apologizing to you? Or would I be on the phone, trying to get them covered?" Logan snapped. "We're so understaffed, it's a miracle I got next weekend off in the first place."
"Some miracle," James muttered.
"Look, I'm sorry, I just -- I have to get back to work. I'll see you tomorrow, though, okay?"
"Yeah." James took a deep breath. "Yeah. Call me when you get a break tonight, though, okay? At least we're in the same time zone."
"I will," Logan promised. "And I am sorry, James."
James sighed. "I know."
--
The mansion was dark and lonely and because Logan was a neat freak, it looked almost like no one lived there at all. If it weren't for a lone, dirty coffee mug in the sink James would have thought no one had been in the place since he'd left it. There was barely even anything in the fridge, just a few take out containers and Logan's coffee creamer.
James sighed and shut the fridge door. He wandered towards the bedroom, flipping lights on as he went so the place would feel less abandoned. Usually when he got home, Logan picked him up -- but if he couldn't, one of the other guys did, and they hung out for awhile. But he hadn't invited them over because he'd wanted some private time with Logan on their anniversary weekend, and now...
The bedroom was as devoid as the kitchen had been. The bed was made, of course, and not even wrinkled, as if no one had slept there last night. James dropped his bag on the floor and walked into the master bath. At least there were signs of inhabitance here: Logan's razor was still sitting on the sink counter, a mostly-empty bottle of hair gel had toppled onto its side, and Logan hadn't hung up the bathmat.
It was kind of eerie, being there all alone. James had always wanted a mansion, but hadn't realized how creepy would be to have so much space to himself until he'd lived there all alone. He'd kind of hated the way his footsteps had echoed, and when Logan had bitched about his neighbors being so loud he couldn't get any studying done, having him move in had been a perfect idea. He'd agreed to housesit whenever James was on tour instead of paying real rent, and living together had been just as fun then as it had been back in 2J, and eventually...
James walked back to the bedroom, kicked his shoes off, and lay down. He rolled over and inhaled, and at least Logan's half of the bed kind of smelled like Logan, like his shampoo and body wash.
Eyes shut, James remembered the first night Logan had kissed him, and how they'd stumbled in here drunkenly, to this same bed. They'd been sitting in bed when they'd decided to try out friends with benefits, sex without strings as a way to try to keep their friendship functioning when they both wanted to do each other all the time. And it was in this room, James packing the same luggage that was lying on the floor now, that after months of ducking the subject, pretending there was nothing to it but sex, they'd finally admitted it was more than that.
Two years ago tomorrow.
He rolled onto his back, eyes shut, and decided that even if sex was off the table for the next day, it was still his weekend off. On tour, he rarely got more than four or five hours of sleep a night, and as often as not it was the bumpy, awkward rest of a moving tour bus. At least this was his own bed. His own, non-moving bed, with his own sheets and blankets.
He kicked off his pants, slid down the sheets, and decided to take a nap. And he did drift off eventually, but his last waking thought was that there was no real point in sleeping at home without Logan's body pressed up next to his.
--
James sipped his frozen mocha thing, flipped the page in his magazine, tapped his foot impatiently, and waited. And waited. Logan had to have five free minutes eventually, and as soon as he did...
The hospital was busy, but Logan found time to text him every night. As it got later and later, James wondered if Logan was just avoiding him. Not that was hard, since he was apparently not going to be home at all the whole damn weekend.
He was the only customer left and the coffeeshop's staff was stacking chairs up onto the tables, obviously just waiting for him to leave so they could lock up, when his phone finally rang. It lit up with Hortense -- if his phone got hacked it would be slightly less incriminating if he seemed to be sending dirty texts to a girl -- and he almost spilled the remains of his drink as he scrambled to answer it.
"Hey babe, want coffee?"
There was a long pause. "What? James, where are you?"
James stood up. "The coffeeshop across from the hospital. I figured when you got a few minutes I could stop by."
"Oh. I... I mean, we have a coffee machine here, and the cafeteria."
Logan sounded weird. James frowned. "Wait, do you not want me to come over? Like, do you really not want to see me at all?"
"What? James, no, I just -- of course I want to see you. Please come over. I'm on the fourth floor, call me if security stops you, okay?"
"I'll be there in ten minutes." He hung up and walked to the counter, giving the girl behind it his best smile. "Hey, um, you're obviously closing and I'm sorry to be a pain, but, uh," he grabbed his wallet, "I don't know if you've shut everything down yet, but I'd really like a cup of coffee." He put a fifty down on the counter.
She swooned a little and said, "Sure, no problem, of course."
"Lots of sugar and a splash of half and half?"
She tittered some more and nodded, hurrying off to get what he asked. He left the whole bill, figuring the tip was a good way to thank the staff for staying open late just for him, accepted the coffee when it was done, and hurried across to the hospital. No one stopped him, though a few people gaped when they recognized him. Logan was waiting at the end of the elevator bank on the fourth floor.
He looked tired, leaning against the wall, but he also looked great with his labcoat on and a stethoscope hanging from around his neck. James just drank in the sight for a second, before Logan looked up and noticed him, and it was all James could do not to run over and grab him and kiss him. Even as annoyed as he was, it was still Logan, and James was crazy about him.
Logan smiled and walked towards him. James held out the coffee like a peace offering, not sure why he was the one trying to make peace when Logan was the one who'd screwed up the dates. But Logan accepted the cup, his fingers brushing James' for a long moment, and he gave James an apologetic smile. "What awesome thing did I do to deserve you?"
James bit down a swooning smile of his own and admitted in a murmur, "Wish I could kiss you hello."
"I wish you could, too." Logan took a swig of the coffee, then put a hand on James' shoulder to nudge him down the hall. They walked to a staff room, with a few couches and a TV and a kitchenette. Logan sat on one of the couches and said, "I am so, so sorry, James. I know I screwed up. I feel awful."
"It's fine," James said. "I mean, yeah, it sucks. But hey, I'm here now. It's better than nothing, right?"
"Right," Logan agreed, but his voice was off again, a little high and forced.
"It is, isn't it? Or... you didn't want me to come." James crossed his arms, leaning away from Logan on the couch.
"No! I -- I just didn't expect you to."
"It doesn't sound like a happy surprise."
"Why wouldn't it be happy?"
"You tell me."
Logan sighed his stupid Logan sigh, the one that meant he thought James was being an idiot. "I was going to grab a nap. I'm glad -- I'm grateful to see you, I am. But I've been on my feet for ten hours already, I worked sixteen hours yesterday and I'm just -- I'm exhausted."
James frowned. He understood, but... "I just thought you'd be happy to see me."
"I am. I really am," Logan said quickly. "It was so sweet of you to come all this way, I just wish I was awake enough, or had enough time to make it worth it."
"It is worth it," James said, nudging Logan's knee with his own. He wanted to do more -- he wanted to kiss Logan, wanted to put an arm around Logan and let Logan fall asleep on him. But even this was too public. Any other staff member could walk in at any moment. And though they all knew Logan was gay, he'd gone to great lengths to keep their relationship secret. Everyone thought Logan was his housemate, an old friend taking advantage of an offer to live rent-free in exchange for house sitting while James was on tour. So sure, James could drop by the hospital to say hi, but that was it.
Logan nudged him back and gave him a sleepy smile. "I just don't want you to be bored hanging out all weekend. Are you going out after this?"
James shrugged. "Dunno."
"Hey, just because I'm stuck here doesn't mean you should sit around. Go clubbing or something." Logan elbowed him slightly. "It's only 11, and don't pretend you don't want to go. I know you."
Logan had a point. Most of his nights off, James went out, dancing and drinking and getting photographed in trendy places. He got paid for it, more often than not, but hadn't accepted any official invitations for the weekend because it was supposed to be his alone time with Logan. So he just... didn't feel like it.
He started to say as much, but had only gotten as far as, "I'm not --" when someone behind him squeaked, "Oh my god, you're James Diamond!"
Logan winced, just a tiny bit, and James took a single moment to steel himself. Then he threw on his meet-the-public smile and turned around to see a woman in a lab coat, staring at him with wide eyes from the break room doorway. He said, "Hey, what's up?" and her cheeks went bright red.
"I, um, I, hi. I just..."
Logan cleared his throat. "James, this is my coworker, Alyssa. Or Dr. Aimes, if you're feeling kinky."
Alyssa hissed, "Logan!" as if James couldn't hear her. But she finally unfroze, taking a few steps towards the couch, then stopping awkwardly.
"Hey," James said, standing to hold out his hand. "Nice to meet you. Logan didn't mention that any of his coworkers were cute."
She actually trembled a little bit as she shook his hand, and when he pulled her into a quick, friendly hug. "It's, um, it's really cool to meet you," she managed, thankfully not clinging to him like some fans did. "I mean, I know Logan is your friend and all, but I just, I mean, he's just Logan, so it's a little... weird."
James laughed. "Just Logan, huh?"
"I mean, um. I didn't mean it like that! Logan..."
Logan rolled his eyes. "Yeah, I know, you forgot about my sordid boyband past when you saw that frat boy throw up on me. But to be fair," he grinned, "James threw up on me, too, once. The first time he was drunk."
"Oh god, I'd forgotten about that. I think I blocked it out," James said.
"Considering how much you drank, you might have forgotten for other reasons," Logan said. He added, facing his coworker, "I almost called 9-1-1, I swear to god. We were thirteen years old, I had no idea what to do. I thought he was dying."
"I kinda wished I had. The hangover was brutal," James admitted.
"Nature's way of teaching you not to be such a dumbass."
Alyssa giggled a little.
"Hey," Logan said suddenly. "Lyss, you're heading out, right?"
She nodded. "Just came in to tell you about some of my patients before I go, so you know what's up."
Logan glanced up at James. "James was thinking about going out tonight. Dancing or something."
James stifled a groan. He really didn't want to go out, especially not with some random doctor, and why the hell was Logan setting him up like this, anyway? He forced another smile and said, "Actually, I've been on the road for days, I think I'm just going to head home and crash."
"Oh, that's... that makes sense, you must be exhausted," Alyssa said.
"Are you sure?" Logan asked. "I mean, this is still early for you, and Lyss, here, works the same kind of crazy hours I do. She doesn't get a chance to go out very often."
"Oh, um." Alyssa looked at James and obviously got flustered gain. "I, I couldn't, I just worked 14 hours, I, uh, I need to head home and crash, too. And I look like... I'm a mess anyway."
"That's too bad," James said, hoping he didn't sound as relieved as he felt. "Maybe some other time."
"That would be..." She giggled. "I, um, I need to borrow Logan, though, for... before he starts his next set of rounds, so..."
"Oh." James looked over at Logan.
"I guess I have to get back to work." Logan stood up and stretched, giving James an apologetic look. "Sorry, if I'd know you were coming all this way I'd have..."
"All the way to the hospital, or all the way to LA?" James snapped. A hurt look flashed across Logan's face, but James turned towards Alyssa. "I'll get out of your hair, then. Hey, you want a picture?"
She squeaked again and nodded vigorously. "That would be really, um, really cool. If you don't mind, I mean. I don't want to, to bother you."
He faked a cheerful laugh. "I offered, right?" He put an arm around her and glanced at Logan. "You want to do the honors?"
He recognized Logan's expression, the same fake cheer he was using himself. Anyone who survived life as a teen idol had to be able to pull that off. But he grabbed his phone and snapped the shot, pressed a few buttons, and a moment later a beep sounded from one of Alyssa's lab coat pockets. "There you go, one picture of a smart lady with my idiot roommate."
"Funny," James said, rolling his eyes.
"Um, Lyss, can you hang on one second? I'm just going to walk James out. I rearranged the kitchen, he can't find anything, he wants to complain about it."
"Yeah, oh, um, I'll be right here," she said.
Logan grabbed James' arm and half-dragged him out into the hall. "James --"
"Why were you trying to set me up on some kind of weird not-date with your coworker?" James interrupted.
"Because you're sitting around sulking and just because I screwed up. And I'm sorry, but seriously, you should be doing something fun while I trapped here."
"Yeah, well going out with a stranger when all I want is some time with you is not my idea of fun!"
"It's not like I could have gone out with you anyway, and you know it. And don't pretend you don't go out without me all the --"
"Yeah, when I'm seeing you every day. I haven't seen you in four months!"
"I haven't seen you either! It's not like I want to be here all weekend."
"If you don't want to be here, why don't you ditch? Wait," James cut off Logan's answer, "because even now that you're pushing 30, you're still afraid of getting in trouble."
"Because this is my job. And if I was going to ditch it after managing to get next weekend off, I'd owe my coworkers an explanation. But it's not like I can tell them anything, is it?" Logan's voice had gone bitter and he wouldn't look over at James.
"Is that what this is about?" James stared at him.
"This isn't -- it's not about anything. I screwed up. And I'm sorry. But there's nothing I can do about it, so just... I'll see you tomorrow afternoon, okay?"
"Yeah. Whatever," James said, pressing the button for the elevator.
He shot one last look at Logan as it dinged and the door slid open. But Logan was staring down at the floor. And James wasn't sure if he was guilty or angry as the door shut. He just knew that it sucked.
--
James woke to his phone ringing. He smiled groggily at the familiar strains of oh oh ohhhh oh, groped for it in the semi-dark of his bedroom, and mumbled, "Kendall?"
"So should Carlos and I let ourselves in or do you want to come open the door?"
"Depends." James sat up. "Do you have keys and the security code, or are you letting yourself in with a brick through the window?"
"Which will get you out of bed quicker?"
"I'll be right there." James grabbed a pair out sweatpants out of the dresser and pulled them on awkwardly as he walked. Kendall and Carlos were both waiting on the front porch, duffel bags of gear and hockey sticks in tow.
"Would you rather eat first, or get your butt kicked first?" Carlos asked, grinning.
"Seriously?" James yawned. "What're you doing here?"
"Logan called us in a panic yesterday afternoon," Kendall explained. "He said we should entertain you for awhile. So..."
James stood aside so they could come in. "Hockey, then food. Lemme get a shirt on."
"I dunno, I bet there are plenty of people who'd love to see you play shirtless," Carlos mused. "We've got a rink rented, hurry your butt up."
"How'd you pull that off, last minute?" James asked over his shoulder, heading for the bedroom.
"The owner has a crush on me," Carlos answered cheerfully. "And I have a company card now to pay for it."
Kendall made a scoffing noise. James didn't bother to shut the bedroom door as he rummaged for clothing, since he'd lived with these guys for years. "If you keep spending money like this, Griffin's going to take it away," Kendall said.
"Nah." Carlos leaned back against a wall while James pulled a t-shirt out of his drawer. It was a little musty, since everything had been sitting there for months. "I'm supposed to wine and dine people, right? And James is Rocque Records' top money maker. Spoiling him is a totally legit business expense."
"Whatever."
James laughed. "Are you sulking because you don't get a company card?"
"No." Kendall's arms were crossed and he was scowling.
Carlos howled with laugher. "He totally is!"
Kendall rolled his eyes hugely, which meant James' guess was 100% right. He and Carlos both technically worked for Griffin -- Kendall as an associate producer at Rocque Records and Carlos in sales for RCM-CBT Globalnet Sanyoid. He'd tried it on a whim and turned out to be a natural: he'd always been a people person, and with his networking skills and natural charm, he'd already turned into one of the company's top salespeople, and apparently the company was happy to let him spend whatever he needed to get the job done.
Even when the job was cheering up a dejected pop star.
James finished getting dressed and fixed his hair. "All right. I'm ready."
"Hope you're not too out of shape..." Kendall mused.
James snorted. "You wish. I can still kick your ass around the rink."
"Still? When have you ever done that?"
"Did I give you a concussion last time? Is that why you can't remember?"
"I don't have a concussion, but you might be delusional."
"Save the trash talk for the ice, you two," Carlos said, leading the way back towards the door. "Besides, we all know I'm going to kick both your butts anyway."
--
Carlos was right, as it turned out. Which was why Kendall caught James' eye as they headed into a restaurant for lunch, and James nodded, and the two of them tackled him. James wrapped his arms around Carlos so Kendall gave him a noogie. Carlos just laughed it off and said, "Loser buys lunch, you two can arm wrestle for it or something."
"I'll get lunch," Kendall said as they were seated. The hostess giggled into the menu when James winked at her. After she left them, he added, voice a little lower, "I'm not making him buy lunch on his anniversary."
"Hey, that's right," Carlos said. "You and Logan, wow. It's too bad he has work. That really sucks."
James twisted a napkin between his hands, a little bit of anger finally coming out. "I told him I'd be in town three weeks ago! He said he was going to take care of everything and instead he forgot. He forgot our anniversary!"
"He feels really awful about it," Kendall said. "He was seriously freaking out on the phone last night."
"Yeah? Well when I saw him last night, he tried to send me out with some chick. Like I'd want to go out without him or something."
"You go out without him all the time," Carlos said.
"When I'm out of town!"
"Or when you just feel like going out," Kendall reminded him. "You're way more of a partier than he is. He probably just wanted you to have a good time."
"I'd have a good time with him."
"Not out dancing," Carlos said. "Logan hates it when you drag him out but you can't dance with him, anyway."
"Yeah, but..." James scowled at them. "It still sucks. I only came home to see him!"
"Oh, thanks a lot," Kendall said.
"You know what I mean. It's our anniversary, god damn it. And he wouldn't even take a few hours off to see me. Just a few!"
"Well, he can't," Carlos said. "I mean, the way the hospital treats interns is really awful, he works harder than me and Kendall put together. We never see him, either."
"If he works so damn much, you'd think he'd be able to get one afternoon off."
"They kind of need him, though. You know, so patients don't, like, die."
"There are other doctors!"
"Yeah, but..." Carlos looked over at Kendall helplessly, and Kendall rolled his eyes.
"Logan doesn't bitch when you leave to go on tour for four months," he said.
"He doesn't?" Somehow, that didn't make James feel better. Like, what, Logan didn't even care when he was gone?
"Well..." Kendall shrugged. "He does, actually, kind of a lot. But he doesn't ask you to stay, is my point. So you asking him to ditch his work is really not fair."
"But I only came back to see him this weekend --"
"James." Carlos again. "We love you, bro, and Logan being busy totally blows, and we all know it. Logan especially knows it. But are you really gonna complain that he's busy with a career he loves when you, you know, are always out of town for your career that you love?"
"But --"
Kendall broke in. "And are you really complaining that Logan wanted you to have a good time without him? When, no offense, but you're the one who's keeping your relationship totally on the DL and he couldn't go out with you if he wanted to?"
"That's..." James took a deep breath. "That's really not the point, okay? This weekend was supposed to be about us."
Kendall and Carlos exchanged a look, and neither one of them looked very happy. But Carlos just said, "Okay." And let it drop.
--
Before dropping him back home, Kendall looked over at James and said, "I'm supposed to pick Logan up in a couple hours. But he only asked me because you were out of town. So..."
"Yeah," James said. Thinking about Logan made his chest feel tight but also made his blood pump too hard, angry and miserable all at once, but it was still their anniversary. "I'll take care of it."
"Okay." Kendall paused. "It really does suck, James. And I'm not saying you shouldn't be pissed at Logan. I would be."
"Thank you. Jesus."
"But," Kendall continued quickly, "screwing up something like this also isn't like Logan. He must be seriously stressed out for this to happen. That's all I'm saying. But anyway, yeah, he should be done between one and two sometime."
James knew a lecture when he heard one and rolled his eyes. "Whatever."
"Just sayin'."
"Bye." He opened the door. Then, because he wasn't a total jerk, he added, "Thanks for breakfast."
Kendall rolled his eyes.
--
The thing was, it was their anniversary. James knew Logan would really just want to pass out, but he also knew Logan probably wouldn't have eaten much in the last day and would need sustenance to avoid death. So he ran out to get a giant tray of sushi, stacked with all of Logan's favorites, stashed it in the otherwise-bare fridge, then showered and got his face on. He dressed casual-but-hot and set out for the hospital, the once again grabbed a table in the coffeeshop. It was busier now, and a lot of people did doubletakes when they saw him. James tried not to let it go to his head, but now on his third solo album, he was pretty famous.
He texted Logan, Told K Id take u home myself, waiting in coffeeshop, c u soon :)
A little after one, he got a message back: I'm trying to get out of here but there's still so much to do. I'll be there as soon as I can.
Even when stressed, Logan texted complete sentences. James rolled his eyes fondly and waited, sipping his drink. It was nearly two before Logan walked in, shuffling like a zombie, obviously barely keeping his eyes open. James sprang up and called his name, then manipulated Logan down into the chair he'd just abandoned. "You need coffee. Stat. That's what you doctors say, right?"
Logan gave him a smile that was exhausted down to his dimples. "That's the one."
James hurried up to the counter to get Logan's drink. By the time he got back to the table, Logan had his arms folded across it and his head resting on his arms. "Hey. Here," James said.
Logan accepted the coffee, inhaled half of it, and then gave him another smile. "Thank you so much. You are amazing. Can we go home?"
"Of course." James gave Logan a hand up, paused to wave at the barista who'd made their drinks, and headed out. "You look kind of dead."
"I feel kind of dead. I got..." He rubbed his forehead with his free hand, "I dunno, an hour of sleep? Maybe an hour and a half? And the on call room is not exactly restful, so I'm kinda... kinda out of it."
They slid into the car. Logan drank some more coffee and then put the cup into a holder, pulled on his seatbet, leaned back, and shut his eyes. James glanced at him as he pulled out of the parking spot, and almost did a doubletake. Obviously Logan was tired, but seeing him like that -- eyes shut with deep bags under them, stubbly, his hair a wreck and his clothes wrinkled, and so tense it looked like he might shatter -- brought back dozens of memories of Logan passed out in tour busses, in limos, in chairs, anywhere he could sleep. They had all been like that, conking out whenever the got a chance on tour, because sleep was a very, very rare thing. And James still functioned like that a lot of the time, but Logan didn't. Not usually, anyway.
He tried to ignore the memory of what Kendall said, that Logan had to be insanely stressed and exhausted to have screwed up their schedules. Instead, he took a deep breath and reminded himself of how desperate he'd been yesterday, when all he'd wanted was Logan and a nap.
He sighed. "I'll wake you when we get home."
Logan pried his eyes open. "I can stay aw..." He yawned. "I want to see you. I can try."
"Don't." James reached over to squeeze Logan's shoulder, just for a second. "Seriously, you need the sleep."
Logan nodded a little. "Thanks for picking me up."
"No problem."
Logan's eyes were shut by the end of the block.
--
When they arrived home, Logan gamely pretended to be excited about lunch, sat at the table, and managed not to fall asleep and land face-first on the tray of sushi rolls James had ordered. James appreciated the effort, though most of the sushi ended up back in the fridge, since Logan wasn't even that hungry.
But he still looked at James with his dark eyes and said, "Thanks. That was really sweet of you."
James shrugged. He knew that was Logan's peace offering, sitting up for lunch and trying to stay upright when he looked like he was about to collapse. Because he did want to see James. So James took it for what it was and answered, "No big."
Logan stared at him for a long minute, then took his hand and tugged him towards the bedroom. "It's our anniversary. I can stay awake for at least a little bit longer, right?"
James grinned as Logan pulled him down on to the bed and kissed him. Logan tasted like coffee -- he always did -- and James tingled with warmth, with quiet anticipation, and rolled over to rummage in his bedside drawer for a bottle of lube.
By time he turned back around, Logan's eyes where shut. James couldn't help himself. It was ridiculous, so he laughed as he stripped down to his boxers anyway. Logan stirred. "What's... did I fall asleep? Shit, no, I'm awake. James, I am."
"No. You're not."
"I can, though. It's our anniversary, and..." Logan yawned. "And you came all the way home to see me."
James sighed. "Yeah, but I don't want you to pass out when we're screwing. Let's just... just take a nap." He slid down the sheet and slid under it.
Logan didn't need any more prompting than that. He kicked off his pants and crawled in next to James, who snaked an arm under him to pull him close. Logan curled up, head on James' shoulder, but said, "Wake me in a few hours, okay? I mean it. I just need a," yawn, "a nap, and then... you and me. Dinner, something nice. My treat."
"Okay," James said, and pulled Logan close.
Logan was asleep again moments later, his breathing steady and even. And maybe this wasn't exactly an exciting anniversary, but god damn it, James was on vacation, and Logan was here. It wasn't anything like the anniversary James had imagined, but at least napping with Logan in his arms felt better.
--
James woke to distant beeping. He frowned into the dim room and disentangled himself from Logan, who didn't even stir. It was later now, almost seven, and if he was going to get any real time with Logan, he needed to wake up.
He followed the sound of the beeping down the hall and to the kitchen, where Logan's phone was sitting on the table, left there after their attempt at lunch. He reached to silence it and found a reminder flashing across the screen: Don't forget! Drop J's delicates off for cleaning & air out dresser & closet!
He blinked, closed the message, and opened Logan's freakishly well organized reminder system. Scrolling through notes for the next few days, he found:
Don't forget! Clean out the fridge & buy real food for J!
Don't forget! Cuda products on sale -- stock up for J!
Don't forget! Confirm dinner reservations, table must be DISCRETE!
Don't forget! Call boys about Sunday brunch??
And finally, Don't forget! J's flight gets in at 3!!!!
James stared, feeling almost dizzy. Maybe Logan had screwed up the dates, but James had never even thought about everything Logan did before he got home. He always came home to a clean, bright mansion, with a fridge full of his favorites, his products fully stocked in the bathroom, clean clothes, clean sheets, and his boyfriend waiting at the luggage return with a smile and a friendly hug because they couldn't kiss in public.
Logan did all that for him, despite his own hectic schedule. And apparently he did it every single time James came home, even if it was just for a few days, even in the midst of a weekend schedule from hell that he'd put together just so he could get a few days free.
He swallowed, throat gone dry with guilt. He'd been so annoyed by the whole weekend, pissed off when Logan had been planning all of this. Small stuff, but lots of it, just to make him comfortable. Stuff he never even noticed, that he'd certainly never thanked Logan for, but that Logan did anyway, because...
Because Logan loved him.
James set the phone down guiltily and padded back to the bedroom. He wanted to see Logan, actually spend some time with him, but Logan needed the sleep. The patients and everyone else who counted on Logan needed him to get the sleep so he could be sharp and coherent for them. So James just stood there in the doorway, staring at Logan in the dim light, and smiled. Then he walked back to the living room to chill out by himself -- if Logan woke up, great, and if not, well, that was fine.
But James did go get Logan's phone and plug it in. Then he opened up the reminder system again and began to play.
--
An alarm screeched and James jolted upright in bed. Next to him, Logan said, "Shit, shit, shit!" and practically vaulted out of the sheets.
James looked at the clock. It was quarter after seven in the morning. "Logan?"
"That's my -- my last alarm, where the hell is my phone? It should have been ringing an hour ago!"
"Oh, shit, sorry," James said. "I found it in the kitchen last night, I plugged it in out there. I must have turned it off by accident or something."
Logan looked pissed off for about half a second, then guilty, and he groaned. "You were going to wake me up last night!"
"You needed the sleep." James shrugged.
"But it was our anniversary --"
"Yeah, but we're going to have, like, what? Forty or fifty more of those? It's no big deal, Logan, seriously. I'm sorry I've been so..." He shrugged.
Logan stared at him, eyes wide, then repeated, "Forty or fifty more?"
"Well, yeah. I'm not planning on breaking up with you any time soon, so..."
Logan climbed back on to the bed, grabbed James' shoulder, and kissed him. Which now tasted like coffee and morning breath, and should have been gross, but it wasn't because it was Logan, and James loved him even when he was disgusting. But Logan pulled away after a second.
"I love you. But I should already be on my way out the door. I'd skip if I could, I really would, but..."
James pulled away too. "Go shower. I'll make coffee and find you breakfast."
Logan threw him a grateful look and then ran towards the bathroom. James pulled himself out of bed, stretched for a second, and hurried to the kitchen. The coffee maker was some kind of huge, fancy machine that he barely understood, but even he had worked out how to make a simple pot of coffee. He grabbed a travel mug from the cabinet, poured some cereal into Tupperware, grabbed an orange from a fruit bowl on the counter, double checked that it wasn't plastic, and then stuck some of the previous day's leftovers in a bag.
He had the whole thing ready to go when Logan stumbled out, dressed but still damp. He hadn't even bothered with hair product, which meant his hair was going to be ridiculous and fluffy all day.
James presented him with the packed breakfast and mug of coffee and kissed his cheek. "Have a good day. Save lives. Be awesome."
Logan chuckled a tiny bit, then kissed him, his mouth minty-fresh. Though he took a gulp of coffee a second later. "I'll do my best. Text me when your flight lands."
James nodded. "And don't forget your phone." He handed it to Logan and pushed him towards the door.
But Logan paused to kiss him again -- there was the coffee breath -- and said, "Thank you. I love you."
"Duh." James grinned. "I love you too. Now get going, Doctor Mitchell."
Logan hurried out the door and James watched him go, smiling a little. It wasn't exactly the anniversary weekend he'd hoped for, but he'd take it.
--
James was lying on the couch, staring at some daytime talk show and waiting for the car he'd called to come pick him up, when the door opened and someone entered the security code to stop it from beeping. He sat up, glancing down the hall, wondering who it was. They had a housekeeper, Kendall and Carlos both had keys and the security code, and of course Logan...
Logan walked up the hall and stopped, looking down at him. James blinked. Logan shouldn't have been home for hours, if he was doing a double shift, but there he was. And he broke into a huge smile. "Thank god, I thought I might have missed you. Who's giving you a ride to the airport?"
"A car service. What's --"
"When?"
"About twenty minutes. Logan --"
"Call and cancel it, I'll drive you. I need to brush my teeth."
With that, Logan hurried past him, towards the bedroom with the master bath. "What?" James yelled after him.
"Just do it!" Logan yelled back.
So James did, scrambling for his phone. He apologized, agreed to pay the cancellation fee since the car was already on the way, and then hurried to the bedroom. The bathroom door was open, and Logan was indeed brushing his teeth. He finally finished, put his toothbrush away, and rinsed his mouth.
"Logan, what's --"
That was as far as he got before Logan grabbed him, hauling him close by the shirt, and kissed him, hard and desperate. James moaned, sinking into it, shuddering at the way two days' worth of Logan's stubble scraped his chin. And when Logan finally came up for air, he shoved James back against the bathroom door, body still pressed against James' shoulder to hip. But his hands went south, momentarily cupping James' dick before undoing his belt, his fly, and pushing James' pants down.
James moaned into Logan's ear, having a hard time catching his breath with Logan right there. But as Logan pushed his boxers down, James managed, "Not that I'm not glad to see you, but what... what happened to work?"
Logan's hands dug into James' side, nails scraping his skin. "We have seventeen minutes. Talk later, fuck me now."
"Fuck, Logan," James hissed, his whole body going hot and on-edge, because since when did Logan talk like that? For that matter, since when did Logan shove him up against doors?
Not that James was going to complain about it.
"Yes. Fuck Logan," Logan agreed, and this time when he hauled James around it was to push him back into the bedroom. James stumbled, stepping out of his clothes as he rushed towards the bed. Logan followed a little bit more slowly -- no, not slowly. Just purposefully. James landed on the bed and twisted around to see Logan, who waited to have his full attention before pulling off his shirt, the sight reminding James that for all Logan had always been a nerd, he'd also always been an athlete. Logan was fit and muscular and gorgeous.
Maybe James had just been out of town too long, gone too many months without sex or something. But all he could really do was sit there and gape at Logan.
At least, until Logan finally walked the rest of the way to the bed and pushed James down on to his back, climbed over him and straddled his thighs. James moaned as Logan wrapped a hand around James' dick, and then his own, and the moan went high as Logan jerked them both, pulling harder than James usually liked but god damn it was perfect somehow. He pushed himself up onto his elbows and watched, gaze skipping back and forth from Logan's hands to his face, reveling in the dark intensity and concentration written in Logan's expression, in having that fixed on him.
"God," James mumbled. "You're so fucking hot like this. I want," he paused to breathe, his chest heaving, "want you so fucking much."
Logan smirked down at him, his dimples suddenly sexy instead of boyish, and James reached for him, pulling him into a kiss. Logan shifted, freeing his arms so he could push his hands against James' shoulders, pinning him down. Logan thrust against him, their bodies aligned so James' dick slid against Logan's.
Logan pulled his mouth away from James' and mumbled against James' ear, "I need you in me so fucking bad."
James kissed him and reached towards the side of the bed, groping blindly for the drawer where they kept a bottle of KY. He managed to get it out and snapped it open one-handed.
"You want to?" James asked. "Or do you want me to?"
"What do you want?" Logan asked.
James started to say he'd stretch Logan, but when he looked back up at Logan's face he changed his mind: "I want to watch you."
Logan's eyes went wide, but he grinned down at James. "Well. Okay, then." He kissed James again and took the lube from his hand, then crawled towards the head of the bed. He coated one hand, then leaned forward, bracing himself against the headboard with the other, and twisted around. It was a little bit awkward, but he kept his gaze fixed on James as he fingered himself. James just stared at the sight of Logan's fingers pressing deeper, moving, as he stretched. He almost grimaced, but after a minute the sharp lines of his face softened and his breath started to come in uneven pants. As he carefully added a third finger and pressed deeper, he caught James' gaze again and licked his lips. "This is," he moaned, "you watching is," another moan, "I think about you all the, all the goddamn time, every time I... every time."
James swallowed, staring at him, thinking about it. About Logan jerking off and yelling his name into the empty room, about Logan fucking himself like this, alone on the bed but imagining James. He couldn't help himself: he surged forward and wrapped his arms around Logan, kissed his neck, bit his ear. It was a little awkward with the way Logan was twisted, and Logan had to stop what he was doing -- but maybe that was okay, because he leaned in to kiss James, clutching him desperately.
"I'm ready," Logan said, voice low and gravely, untwisting in James' grip.
James grabbed Logan's shoulders and pressed him into the headboard, facing the wall, and kissed the back of his neck. He used the lube to slick himself up, but Logan was mumbling, "Come on, James, come on," like he couldn't wait another second. James wrapped one arm around Logan to hold himself steady, and his other hand to align himself. Logan looked over his shoulder, his smirk just begging for it, so James pressed inside.
Logan was tight and hot, clinging to the headboard with his free hand, but his breath caught and his eyelashes fluttered when James was barely inside. James waited for him to adjust but Logan reached back for his hip, squeezing it, and babbled, "More, James, god, more, please." So James pressed in further, and even though Logan went silent, grimacing, he still urged James on with the hand on his hip.
James found a rhythm, slow but deep enough to make Logan's body go tense with every thrust, and he grabbed Logan's hand from his hip to bring it up to the headboard. Then, both hands over Logan's and bracing himself, he sped up. Logan twisted again, just far enough to kiss him, moaning into his mouth, low against the thumping of the headboard into the wall.
He slowed down again, realizing he was crushing Logan against the headboard. But Logan raised his eyebrows, his forehead sweaty, and said, "What's the matter?"
James dropped a hand to Logan's hip, around to his dick. "You okay?"
"Seriously?" Logan smirked. "I'm not made of glass. I won't break. And I want to fucking feel this for a week."
James' voice went low: "Then have it your way."
He pulled out of Logan, drawing back from the headboard, and nudged Logan down towards the mattress, following him once he moved. But Logan grabbed him and rolled, their legs tangling together as Logan gripped his upper arm. And somehow James was the one on his back, but he couldn't exactly complain, because a moment later Logan was on top of him, staring down at him as he straddled James, and holy fuck. Logan had to twist a little to see what he was doing, but it only took a second before he sank down onto James, his head thrown back and his shoulders heaving.
"Fuck," James grunted, staring up at him, his body quivering. Logan was moving slowly, still clutching James' arm, but James' mind rang with the way Logan's voice had gone all growly and deep when he'd said he wanted to feel this. So James grabbed for Logan's hips, nudging down insistently, and slammed his own hips up.
Logan let out a strangled, "Jesus--!" but aside from his fingers digging into James' shoulder, he didn't object. Just shifted back upwards and the next time he slid down, it was harder and faster, meeting James deliberately, matching him thrust for thrust.
Logan's free hand went to his dick, matching the same up-down-up-down, better rhythm than he'd ever had dancing -- but when he started to lose it, his moans trailing off into deep breaths, James knew exactly how close he was. He reached up to put a hand on Logan's jaw, said, "Look at me, babe," and as they locked eyes, Logan came, quivering around James' cock.
James pulled out of him, catching his breath while Logan did, slumping down against his chest. But Logan only drooped for a few seconds. Then he leaned down to kiss James hard on the mouth, mumbled into his jaw, "You, too. I want to see you -- want to feel you come, James, come on, please."
How could he resist that? Grinning, James wrapped his arms around Logan and rolled over, and though Logan gasped a little, he nodded too. He pulled James down on top of him as he dug his feet into the mattress, spreading his legs, opening himself up. James took a second to lube up again, and it was an easier slide inside this time. Logan gasped again, hands digging into James' shoulders so hard they might bruise, but even oversensitive and spent, Logan bucked up against James, meeting his body. Between hot kisses to James' neck and shoulders, he kept mumbling, "Come on, fuck, James, I want you to come inside me, want to feel it, need you, oh god, James, James." James had never heard him like that before -- he was usually quieter, he usually let James take the lead, he usually waited for James to start things.
But Jesus, Logan shoving James against walls and demanding to be fucked, Logan pinning him down and riding him, Logan all but begging him to come -- wherever this had come from, it was amazing. When Logan bit his shoulder, James was done. He came in a rush, buried as deep inside Logan as he could, Logan's name falling from his lips.
James went boneless and collapsed on top of Logan, who kissed him again and murmured, "Hey."
Maybe he wasn't made of glass and he wasn't going to break, but still, as soon as James caught his breath he shifted off of Logan to make sure he could breathe. But he did mold himself to Logan's side, head resting on Logan's shoulder. He knew he needed to move, they both needed to clean up and get going to the airport, but he just couldn't bring himself to.
Instead he said, "Wow."
Logan grinned at him, whatever fervor had driven him before faded. This was the Logan he was used to, whose dimples were always going to make him look playful and boyish. "Yeah?"
"Yeah. You... Wow. What brought that on?"
Logan sat up, winced, and rolled over on to his knees to reach for a box of tissues. "I hate to say it, but we can talk in the car. We'd better..."
"Yeah." James couldn't bring himself to scowl, though, not while he was still reeling. "But just, for future reference, damn, Logan."
Logan grinned at him from over his shoulder as he headed towards the bathroom, walking slowly. James finally forced himself up, cleaned himself off and used another few tissues to wipe the sweat off his face. He desperately wished that he had time to shower, but they only had about a minute before they were supposed to go, and if he missed his flight, Kelly would actually murder him. He had two interviews as soon as he landed and a club appearance later that night...
He was digging through his luggage to find his deodorant when Logan came back out. He began pulling on clothing, hissing a little bit as he moved.
"You okay?" James asked.
"Yeah, just sore. Been awhile since I've had a workout like that." He gave James an especially cheesy grin as he said it.
James chuckled and finally started getting dressed himself, though clothing against his still-sweaty skin was not exactly appealing. He forced himself into it anyway and said, "So now that we've fucked, are you going to talk to me?"
Logan laughed awkwardly. "Yeah, uh, sure. I just -- we didn't have a lot of time."
"I know." James kissed him the cheek, then pulled his shirt on. "So what happened to the hospital?"
"Well..." Logan ducked his head a little, then pulled his phone out of his pocket. "I was maybe sulking all morning because the weekend was so... what it was. And then my phone gives me this reminder I don't remember programming in."
He gave James a meaningful look and handed over his phone. James glanced at the screen, then away, a little bit embarrassed. "I must have put it in wrong. It was supposed to go off tonight, when you get off your shift, I thought... I thought you could use a pick-me-up or something."
Logan grinned down at him, reading it again. James had just casually stuck it in with all of his other notes: Don't forget! J loves you!!
They started out of the door, James wheeling his suitcase and Logan hauling his carryon. They loaded them into Logan's car and James got in, watching as Logan winced hugely as he sat down. "You okay?"
"Yeaaaah, just." He shifted, trying to get comfortable, and evidently failed, judging by the grimace on his face. "Maybe offering to drive you right after we fuck was not my greatest plan. Jesus, I might actually feel this for a week."
"You said..."
"I know." Logan looked over at him, grimace replaced by a smirk, before pulling out of the driveway. "And I meant it. There was no way I was going to let you leave without us getting it on."
"So what," James mused, "you saw one little note on your phone, skipped out on the job you've been dreaming about since you were eight, and came home to have sex with me? Because babe, if that's all I have to do, you might as well move into my tour bus. You're never getting out of bed again."
"Really, really tempting," Logan said. "I could just lie around, make you bring me food, catch up on some reading while you're busy, and have sex with you all the time. Why did I go to med school again? Whose idea was this whole doctor thing?"
"But you love being a doctor," James said, then considered it. "I guess I could give up my career. Stay at home as your live-in boyfriend, spend my days lounging by the pool, have dinner on the table when you get home, and have sex with you all the time."
"Have dinner ready for me? You can't cook," Logan reminded him.
"If I wasn't busy with a career, I could learn."
"I like this plan," Logan said. Then added, "But you love singing."
"I do." James sighed. "I just don't love being away from you so much."
"Yeah, well I don't love working too much to see you when you're here."
James considered it for a second, then shrugged. "I guess this is just what happens when two incredibly busy people fall in love. But... my tour doesn't last forever, and when I'm back in town to record..."
"Yeah, and when I finish my internship, I might be able to wrangle a position that's got slightly more regular hours." Logan looked over at him. "I really am sorry about this weekend --"
"It was a fuck up. It happens. Even to geniuses," James interrupted. "So stop apologizing because I'm not mad and I forgive you. And... I kind of can't believe you ditched work for me. You've never ditched anything in your life."
"Yeah, and it wasn't easy." Logan laughed. "You're going to be so grossed out by this. But we were so understaffed I couldn't just leave, and since it's not like I could explain what had happened..."
James swallowed a tiny knot of guilt at that. It wasn't that he didn't want to come out publicly about his relationship with Logan, but he had no idea what it would do to his career. Plus, Logan liked his privacy, and they both knew that when James finally did come out, it would be a paparazzi storm. So for now, he wasn't planning to. But someday...
"So what did you do?" James asked.
"Faked food poisoning," Logan said. "Lyss saw me eating sushi, and a few minutes later I told her I wasn't feeling so hot... She drew her own conclusions when I puked."
James did a doubletake. "You what? Oh my god, are you okay?"
"I'm fine." Logan chuckled. "Do you remember when we were in fourth grade and Carlos ate those berries and I had to call poison control?"
"I thought he was going to die," James remembered. Kendall was the one who'd realized the berries were poisonous, since his mom had told him to never let Katie near them, but Carlos had already downed a bunch of them, and was lying on the ground, moaning. They'd all freaked out, sure Carlos was poisoned and going to keel over at any moment, but Logan had managed to call 9-1-1.
"They made him puke," Logan continued. "No one really uses ipecac anymore, but we keep it at the hospital just in case, so..."
"So you made yourself puke?"
"Yeah," Logan said, making a face. "I just took a little, Lyss saw me vomit, I told her I thought maybe the sushi was bad... then I puked on her shoes and, well, she practically threw me out, said she'd cover my patients until they could find someone to get there and take over for me."
"Gross."
"That's why I was afraid I wouldn't be home in time," Logan said. "I had to pull over a few times, you know, uh, get the rest of it out of my system. But by the time I got there..."
"You just had to brush your teeth," James realized.
"Right. And then not tell you I'd just vomited on the side of the road, because I still wanted you to have sex with me, and post-vomit is not sexy on anyone."
"You were worried about that?" James shook his head a little. "Logan, you ditched work for me. Puke or no, I'd still be hot for you."
"That's... kind of romantic. Disgusting, but kind of romantic."
"Says the guy who actually did all the puking."
Logan shrugged. "I was just glad it stopped before I got home. Kinda would have put a damper on the whole sex thing. And babe, I really, really wanted sex."
"Yeah, you made that really obvious." James rubbed his cheek, where he could still feel the stubble burn. "Which was fucking fantastic, by the way. In case you were wondering."
Logan's cheeks went a little red, but he said, "It was, wasn't it?"
"Mmhmm. Hey. Hey, you're free next weekend, right?" At Logan's nod, he continued, "Do you want to fly out? I mean, I'm going to be busy, I get it if you don't want to bother --"
"I'll be there. I can actually get some reading done while you're doing events and we can make out in the car between them." Logan's grin was wide and gorgeous. "And I can watch you perform, and you know what that does to me, babe."
James swallowed, brushing a hand over his neck. The last time Logan had watched one of his shows, he'd apparently really liked the show, because he'd left James with a very hard-to-miss hickey. The press speculated about James' lovelife all the time -- he'd been linked to plenty of starlets, thanks to his excellent PR people, and he knew the (mostly accurate) gay rumors were out there -- but that hickey had definitely set off another round.
"I'll get Kelly to send you my schedule," James promised, shifting over to put a hand on Logan's shoulder. "I wish I didn't have to go. I'll see what I can do, you know, schedule-wise, if I can get out of something so we can get some time together. Not that fast and rough isn't hot, but having more than twenty minutes would be nice, too."
"Yeah, it would. Really. But don't worry if you can't." He glanced over at James, eyes full of warmth. "I mean, we're going to have plenty of time together. Like, you know. Forty or fifty years. That's the rumor I hear, anyway."
James reached over to ruffle Logan's ridiculous, fluffy hair, and said, "Yeah. Forty or fifty years. At least."
Disclaimer: Sometimes I think this show was created just for me, but alas, still not mine.
Rating/warnings: M for sex.
Pairings: James/Logan
Notes: Technically speaking, this is (really, extremely) belated birthdayfic for jblostfan16, who asked for domestic James/Logan. I hope this suffices (and I hope you feel better soon, bb). ♥ And as always, enormous thanks to lielabell for beta reading and making this roughly a gazillion times better.
Summary: A screw up in communicating nearly ruins James and Logan's anniversary. (Futurefic.)
By the time James' plane touched down at LAX, his brain was beating with a steady rhythm of Logan, sex, sleep. Logan, sex, sleep. Logan...
He grabbed his carryon from the overhead, grateful the label had coughed up enough money to get him priority seating -- which included priority exiting. He winked at the flight attendant who held the door, then checked his phone as he walked, looking for a text from Logan that said where he was. Nothing yet -- maybe he'd actually gotten off the plane so quickly Logan hadn't even had a chance to send it yet.
He set his phone to vibrate, since he might not hear over the noise of the airport, and pushed his way through the crowd towards the baggage claim, keeping his eyes peeled even though there was no way Logan could have gotten back here unless he bought a ticket. Which he wouldn't have. Probably.
Not unless he was feeling romantic, anyway, and decided he wanted to greet James with a surprise kiss or something. Maybe if he couldn't stand to be away from James for any longer than he had to, even if it was only five more minutes...
Okay, that wasn't going to happen, if for no reason other than the fact that James was still closeted to the world at large, so Logan couldn't kiss him in public. But it was a nice fantasy.
Though, after four months of being too busy on tour to jump a flight home, and Logan being too busy with his medical internship to grab a flight out to James, James was a little sick of fantasies. Sick of fantasies and talking on the phone, of video chats and texting. Those things were fine, part of the whole long-distance gig, but after four months James was so, so ready for the real thing.
Logan, sex, sleep.
He crossed the security barrier and stood on his tiptoes, trying to search out Logan in the crowd of people waiting. He couldn't spot him, and thanks to his travel get-up (a sweatshirt with the hood pulled up, sunglasses, nothing too distinct) he wasn't exactly eye-catching himself. But Logan would probably find him anyway.
He ducked away from a photographer, looking around to see if any celebrities were milling about, and nudged his way up to the baggage claim before it even started spinning. He tried to find Logan in the crowd again, couldn't spot him, and as the claim grinded to life he grabbed his phone. No missed texts or calls -- maybe Logan was stuck in traffic?
He dashed off at baggage claim where u at? even though he knew Logan hated it when he didn't use full words in text messages. Served him right for not being on time. Then he turned his attention back to the baggage that was now circling, not wanting to miss his stuff and have to wait here even longer. It was easy to spot, since he'd tied a purple bandana around the handle as way to tell it apart from the million other boring black bags.
His phone started ringing as he hauled the bag off the track. He picked it up, mumbled, "One sec," and nudged his way out of the crowd of people waiting for their stuff. Once he'd gotten a few inches of breathing room, he said, "Sorry, okay, I'm back. Where are you?"
"Where am... where are you?"
"At the baggage claim." He craned his neck, searching for Logan. "I don't see you anywhere, where --"
"The baggage claim?" Logan repeated. His voice sounded weird, high and squeaky, like it always did when he was freaking out. "The baggage claim at LAX?"
"Uh, yeah? You... you aren't here?"
Logan swallowed audibly. "James, what weekend is it?"
"What?"
"What weekend --"
"Babe, you are working too hard if you don't know --"
"Shit, shit!" The sound of something crashing to the ground filtered through the phone, followed by, "Ow, son of a... just, fuck me. It's the nineteenth, isn't it?"
"Yeah," James said. "And fucking you is definitely on the night's to-do list, so where the hell are you?"
Logan sighed, a long, heavy, labored breath. "I'm at the hospital. I screwed my schedule up. Like, a lot."
James' heart began to sink. He leaned against the wall, keeping one hand on his luggage. "Meaning?"
"Meaning I switched shifts to get next weekend off. You said you couldn't get this weekend free --"
"Yeah, not at first, but I talked Kelly into it, remember? I told you about the switch three weeks ago." And getting the weekend switched had been damn hard, too. He'd had to beg and wheedle and double up all kinds of other, stupid events, just to manage it. It had been a hard sell to Kelly even then, but he hadn't stopped pleading until she managed it for him.
Because it was his and Logan's second anniversary.
"You did? Oh, fuck, you did. I forgot to write it down and... god damn it, I forgot and I rearranged my whole schedule so I could get next weekend off."
"Oh. Well that... sucks," James said. Which was putting it mildly, because after four months, all he freaking wanted was a weekend with Logan. But he continued, trying to keep some of the annoyance out of his voice, "I wish you were here, but I'll just get a cab home. I'll see you tonight."
"Oh god, I'm so sorry --"
"It's not that big a --"
"Yes. It is." Logan groaned again. "I was so desperate to get next weekend off that I agreed to work all weekend. I'm pulling a 24 today, I won't even be home until tomorrow afternoon. And then I've got a double on Sunday."
"You... what?" Now James let himself sound kind of upset, because he knew what Logan was like after a full 24-hour shift. He wouldn't get much sleep in the hospital's on-call room, and he'd be dead on his feet by the end. All he ever wanted to do after working that long was collapse... and then he wouldn't even be around Sunday. It wasn't like they'd been planning something big for their anniversary, but after four months apart, all James really wanted was some time together. And now there was no way to get that.
Fuck.
"I can't believe I got the dates wrong," Logan said. "But I've had next weekend on my calendar since your tour dates were finalized. I just didn't realize..."
"The shifts you took, can you just... switch back?" James asked.
"I wish. But it's Greg's honeymoon, he wanted the extra day on Sunday and won't be home, and Suzanne is visiting her mom in Oregon, so..."
"Is there anyone else who can take them?"
"If there was, do you think I'd still be apologizing to you? Or would I be on the phone, trying to get them covered?" Logan snapped. "We're so understaffed, it's a miracle I got next weekend off in the first place."
"Some miracle," James muttered.
"Look, I'm sorry, I just -- I have to get back to work. I'll see you tomorrow, though, okay?"
"Yeah." James took a deep breath. "Yeah. Call me when you get a break tonight, though, okay? At least we're in the same time zone."
"I will," Logan promised. "And I am sorry, James."
James sighed. "I know."
--
The mansion was dark and lonely and because Logan was a neat freak, it looked almost like no one lived there at all. If it weren't for a lone, dirty coffee mug in the sink James would have thought no one had been in the place since he'd left it. There was barely even anything in the fridge, just a few take out containers and Logan's coffee creamer.
James sighed and shut the fridge door. He wandered towards the bedroom, flipping lights on as he went so the place would feel less abandoned. Usually when he got home, Logan picked him up -- but if he couldn't, one of the other guys did, and they hung out for awhile. But he hadn't invited them over because he'd wanted some private time with Logan on their anniversary weekend, and now...
The bedroom was as devoid as the kitchen had been. The bed was made, of course, and not even wrinkled, as if no one had slept there last night. James dropped his bag on the floor and walked into the master bath. At least there were signs of inhabitance here: Logan's razor was still sitting on the sink counter, a mostly-empty bottle of hair gel had toppled onto its side, and Logan hadn't hung up the bathmat.
It was kind of eerie, being there all alone. James had always wanted a mansion, but hadn't realized how creepy would be to have so much space to himself until he'd lived there all alone. He'd kind of hated the way his footsteps had echoed, and when Logan had bitched about his neighbors being so loud he couldn't get any studying done, having him move in had been a perfect idea. He'd agreed to housesit whenever James was on tour instead of paying real rent, and living together had been just as fun then as it had been back in 2J, and eventually...
James walked back to the bedroom, kicked his shoes off, and lay down. He rolled over and inhaled, and at least Logan's half of the bed kind of smelled like Logan, like his shampoo and body wash.
Eyes shut, James remembered the first night Logan had kissed him, and how they'd stumbled in here drunkenly, to this same bed. They'd been sitting in bed when they'd decided to try out friends with benefits, sex without strings as a way to try to keep their friendship functioning when they both wanted to do each other all the time. And it was in this room, James packing the same luggage that was lying on the floor now, that after months of ducking the subject, pretending there was nothing to it but sex, they'd finally admitted it was more than that.
Two years ago tomorrow.
He rolled onto his back, eyes shut, and decided that even if sex was off the table for the next day, it was still his weekend off. On tour, he rarely got more than four or five hours of sleep a night, and as often as not it was the bumpy, awkward rest of a moving tour bus. At least this was his own bed. His own, non-moving bed, with his own sheets and blankets.
He kicked off his pants, slid down the sheets, and decided to take a nap. And he did drift off eventually, but his last waking thought was that there was no real point in sleeping at home without Logan's body pressed up next to his.
--
James sipped his frozen mocha thing, flipped the page in his magazine, tapped his foot impatiently, and waited. And waited. Logan had to have five free minutes eventually, and as soon as he did...
The hospital was busy, but Logan found time to text him every night. As it got later and later, James wondered if Logan was just avoiding him. Not that was hard, since he was apparently not going to be home at all the whole damn weekend.
He was the only customer left and the coffeeshop's staff was stacking chairs up onto the tables, obviously just waiting for him to leave so they could lock up, when his phone finally rang. It lit up with Hortense -- if his phone got hacked it would be slightly less incriminating if he seemed to be sending dirty texts to a girl -- and he almost spilled the remains of his drink as he scrambled to answer it.
"Hey babe, want coffee?"
There was a long pause. "What? James, where are you?"
James stood up. "The coffeeshop across from the hospital. I figured when you got a few minutes I could stop by."
"Oh. I... I mean, we have a coffee machine here, and the cafeteria."
Logan sounded weird. James frowned. "Wait, do you not want me to come over? Like, do you really not want to see me at all?"
"What? James, no, I just -- of course I want to see you. Please come over. I'm on the fourth floor, call me if security stops you, okay?"
"I'll be there in ten minutes." He hung up and walked to the counter, giving the girl behind it his best smile. "Hey, um, you're obviously closing and I'm sorry to be a pain, but, uh," he grabbed his wallet, "I don't know if you've shut everything down yet, but I'd really like a cup of coffee." He put a fifty down on the counter.
She swooned a little and said, "Sure, no problem, of course."
"Lots of sugar and a splash of half and half?"
She tittered some more and nodded, hurrying off to get what he asked. He left the whole bill, figuring the tip was a good way to thank the staff for staying open late just for him, accepted the coffee when it was done, and hurried across to the hospital. No one stopped him, though a few people gaped when they recognized him. Logan was waiting at the end of the elevator bank on the fourth floor.
He looked tired, leaning against the wall, but he also looked great with his labcoat on and a stethoscope hanging from around his neck. James just drank in the sight for a second, before Logan looked up and noticed him, and it was all James could do not to run over and grab him and kiss him. Even as annoyed as he was, it was still Logan, and James was crazy about him.
Logan smiled and walked towards him. James held out the coffee like a peace offering, not sure why he was the one trying to make peace when Logan was the one who'd screwed up the dates. But Logan accepted the cup, his fingers brushing James' for a long moment, and he gave James an apologetic smile. "What awesome thing did I do to deserve you?"
James bit down a swooning smile of his own and admitted in a murmur, "Wish I could kiss you hello."
"I wish you could, too." Logan took a swig of the coffee, then put a hand on James' shoulder to nudge him down the hall. They walked to a staff room, with a few couches and a TV and a kitchenette. Logan sat on one of the couches and said, "I am so, so sorry, James. I know I screwed up. I feel awful."
"It's fine," James said. "I mean, yeah, it sucks. But hey, I'm here now. It's better than nothing, right?"
"Right," Logan agreed, but his voice was off again, a little high and forced.
"It is, isn't it? Or... you didn't want me to come." James crossed his arms, leaning away from Logan on the couch.
"No! I -- I just didn't expect you to."
"It doesn't sound like a happy surprise."
"Why wouldn't it be happy?"
"You tell me."
Logan sighed his stupid Logan sigh, the one that meant he thought James was being an idiot. "I was going to grab a nap. I'm glad -- I'm grateful to see you, I am. But I've been on my feet for ten hours already, I worked sixteen hours yesterday and I'm just -- I'm exhausted."
James frowned. He understood, but... "I just thought you'd be happy to see me."
"I am. I really am," Logan said quickly. "It was so sweet of you to come all this way, I just wish I was awake enough, or had enough time to make it worth it."
"It is worth it," James said, nudging Logan's knee with his own. He wanted to do more -- he wanted to kiss Logan, wanted to put an arm around Logan and let Logan fall asleep on him. But even this was too public. Any other staff member could walk in at any moment. And though they all knew Logan was gay, he'd gone to great lengths to keep their relationship secret. Everyone thought Logan was his housemate, an old friend taking advantage of an offer to live rent-free in exchange for house sitting while James was on tour. So sure, James could drop by the hospital to say hi, but that was it.
Logan nudged him back and gave him a sleepy smile. "I just don't want you to be bored hanging out all weekend. Are you going out after this?"
James shrugged. "Dunno."
"Hey, just because I'm stuck here doesn't mean you should sit around. Go clubbing or something." Logan elbowed him slightly. "It's only 11, and don't pretend you don't want to go. I know you."
Logan had a point. Most of his nights off, James went out, dancing and drinking and getting photographed in trendy places. He got paid for it, more often than not, but hadn't accepted any official invitations for the weekend because it was supposed to be his alone time with Logan. So he just... didn't feel like it.
He started to say as much, but had only gotten as far as, "I'm not --" when someone behind him squeaked, "Oh my god, you're James Diamond!"
Logan winced, just a tiny bit, and James took a single moment to steel himself. Then he threw on his meet-the-public smile and turned around to see a woman in a lab coat, staring at him with wide eyes from the break room doorway. He said, "Hey, what's up?" and her cheeks went bright red.
"I, um, I, hi. I just..."
Logan cleared his throat. "James, this is my coworker, Alyssa. Or Dr. Aimes, if you're feeling kinky."
Alyssa hissed, "Logan!" as if James couldn't hear her. But she finally unfroze, taking a few steps towards the couch, then stopping awkwardly.
"Hey," James said, standing to hold out his hand. "Nice to meet you. Logan didn't mention that any of his coworkers were cute."
She actually trembled a little bit as she shook his hand, and when he pulled her into a quick, friendly hug. "It's, um, it's really cool to meet you," she managed, thankfully not clinging to him like some fans did. "I mean, I know Logan is your friend and all, but I just, I mean, he's just Logan, so it's a little... weird."
James laughed. "Just Logan, huh?"
"I mean, um. I didn't mean it like that! Logan..."
Logan rolled his eyes. "Yeah, I know, you forgot about my sordid boyband past when you saw that frat boy throw up on me. But to be fair," he grinned, "James threw up on me, too, once. The first time he was drunk."
"Oh god, I'd forgotten about that. I think I blocked it out," James said.
"Considering how much you drank, you might have forgotten for other reasons," Logan said. He added, facing his coworker, "I almost called 9-1-1, I swear to god. We were thirteen years old, I had no idea what to do. I thought he was dying."
"I kinda wished I had. The hangover was brutal," James admitted.
"Nature's way of teaching you not to be such a dumbass."
Alyssa giggled a little.
"Hey," Logan said suddenly. "Lyss, you're heading out, right?"
She nodded. "Just came in to tell you about some of my patients before I go, so you know what's up."
Logan glanced up at James. "James was thinking about going out tonight. Dancing or something."
James stifled a groan. He really didn't want to go out, especially not with some random doctor, and why the hell was Logan setting him up like this, anyway? He forced another smile and said, "Actually, I've been on the road for days, I think I'm just going to head home and crash."
"Oh, that's... that makes sense, you must be exhausted," Alyssa said.
"Are you sure?" Logan asked. "I mean, this is still early for you, and Lyss, here, works the same kind of crazy hours I do. She doesn't get a chance to go out very often."
"Oh, um." Alyssa looked at James and obviously got flustered gain. "I, I couldn't, I just worked 14 hours, I, uh, I need to head home and crash, too. And I look like... I'm a mess anyway."
"That's too bad," James said, hoping he didn't sound as relieved as he felt. "Maybe some other time."
"That would be..." She giggled. "I, um, I need to borrow Logan, though, for... before he starts his next set of rounds, so..."
"Oh." James looked over at Logan.
"I guess I have to get back to work." Logan stood up and stretched, giving James an apologetic look. "Sorry, if I'd know you were coming all this way I'd have..."
"All the way to the hospital, or all the way to LA?" James snapped. A hurt look flashed across Logan's face, but James turned towards Alyssa. "I'll get out of your hair, then. Hey, you want a picture?"
She squeaked again and nodded vigorously. "That would be really, um, really cool. If you don't mind, I mean. I don't want to, to bother you."
He faked a cheerful laugh. "I offered, right?" He put an arm around her and glanced at Logan. "You want to do the honors?"
He recognized Logan's expression, the same fake cheer he was using himself. Anyone who survived life as a teen idol had to be able to pull that off. But he grabbed his phone and snapped the shot, pressed a few buttons, and a moment later a beep sounded from one of Alyssa's lab coat pockets. "There you go, one picture of a smart lady with my idiot roommate."
"Funny," James said, rolling his eyes.
"Um, Lyss, can you hang on one second? I'm just going to walk James out. I rearranged the kitchen, he can't find anything, he wants to complain about it."
"Yeah, oh, um, I'll be right here," she said.
Logan grabbed James' arm and half-dragged him out into the hall. "James --"
"Why were you trying to set me up on some kind of weird not-date with your coworker?" James interrupted.
"Because you're sitting around sulking and just because I screwed up. And I'm sorry, but seriously, you should be doing something fun while I trapped here."
"Yeah, well going out with a stranger when all I want is some time with you is not my idea of fun!"
"It's not like I could have gone out with you anyway, and you know it. And don't pretend you don't go out without me all the --"
"Yeah, when I'm seeing you every day. I haven't seen you in four months!"
"I haven't seen you either! It's not like I want to be here all weekend."
"If you don't want to be here, why don't you ditch? Wait," James cut off Logan's answer, "because even now that you're pushing 30, you're still afraid of getting in trouble."
"Because this is my job. And if I was going to ditch it after managing to get next weekend off, I'd owe my coworkers an explanation. But it's not like I can tell them anything, is it?" Logan's voice had gone bitter and he wouldn't look over at James.
"Is that what this is about?" James stared at him.
"This isn't -- it's not about anything. I screwed up. And I'm sorry. But there's nothing I can do about it, so just... I'll see you tomorrow afternoon, okay?"
"Yeah. Whatever," James said, pressing the button for the elevator.
He shot one last look at Logan as it dinged and the door slid open. But Logan was staring down at the floor. And James wasn't sure if he was guilty or angry as the door shut. He just knew that it sucked.
--
James woke to his phone ringing. He smiled groggily at the familiar strains of oh oh ohhhh oh, groped for it in the semi-dark of his bedroom, and mumbled, "Kendall?"
"So should Carlos and I let ourselves in or do you want to come open the door?"
"Depends." James sat up. "Do you have keys and the security code, or are you letting yourself in with a brick through the window?"
"Which will get you out of bed quicker?"
"I'll be right there." James grabbed a pair out sweatpants out of the dresser and pulled them on awkwardly as he walked. Kendall and Carlos were both waiting on the front porch, duffel bags of gear and hockey sticks in tow.
"Would you rather eat first, or get your butt kicked first?" Carlos asked, grinning.
"Seriously?" James yawned. "What're you doing here?"
"Logan called us in a panic yesterday afternoon," Kendall explained. "He said we should entertain you for awhile. So..."
James stood aside so they could come in. "Hockey, then food. Lemme get a shirt on."
"I dunno, I bet there are plenty of people who'd love to see you play shirtless," Carlos mused. "We've got a rink rented, hurry your butt up."
"How'd you pull that off, last minute?" James asked over his shoulder, heading for the bedroom.
"The owner has a crush on me," Carlos answered cheerfully. "And I have a company card now to pay for it."
Kendall made a scoffing noise. James didn't bother to shut the bedroom door as he rummaged for clothing, since he'd lived with these guys for years. "If you keep spending money like this, Griffin's going to take it away," Kendall said.
"Nah." Carlos leaned back against a wall while James pulled a t-shirt out of his drawer. It was a little musty, since everything had been sitting there for months. "I'm supposed to wine and dine people, right? And James is Rocque Records' top money maker. Spoiling him is a totally legit business expense."
"Whatever."
James laughed. "Are you sulking because you don't get a company card?"
"No." Kendall's arms were crossed and he was scowling.
Carlos howled with laugher. "He totally is!"
Kendall rolled his eyes hugely, which meant James' guess was 100% right. He and Carlos both technically worked for Griffin -- Kendall as an associate producer at Rocque Records and Carlos in sales for RCM-CBT Globalnet Sanyoid. He'd tried it on a whim and turned out to be a natural: he'd always been a people person, and with his networking skills and natural charm, he'd already turned into one of the company's top salespeople, and apparently the company was happy to let him spend whatever he needed to get the job done.
Even when the job was cheering up a dejected pop star.
James finished getting dressed and fixed his hair. "All right. I'm ready."
"Hope you're not too out of shape..." Kendall mused.
James snorted. "You wish. I can still kick your ass around the rink."
"Still? When have you ever done that?"
"Did I give you a concussion last time? Is that why you can't remember?"
"I don't have a concussion, but you might be delusional."
"Save the trash talk for the ice, you two," Carlos said, leading the way back towards the door. "Besides, we all know I'm going to kick both your butts anyway."
--
Carlos was right, as it turned out. Which was why Kendall caught James' eye as they headed into a restaurant for lunch, and James nodded, and the two of them tackled him. James wrapped his arms around Carlos so Kendall gave him a noogie. Carlos just laughed it off and said, "Loser buys lunch, you two can arm wrestle for it or something."
"I'll get lunch," Kendall said as they were seated. The hostess giggled into the menu when James winked at her. After she left them, he added, voice a little lower, "I'm not making him buy lunch on his anniversary."
"Hey, that's right," Carlos said. "You and Logan, wow. It's too bad he has work. That really sucks."
James twisted a napkin between his hands, a little bit of anger finally coming out. "I told him I'd be in town three weeks ago! He said he was going to take care of everything and instead he forgot. He forgot our anniversary!"
"He feels really awful about it," Kendall said. "He was seriously freaking out on the phone last night."
"Yeah? Well when I saw him last night, he tried to send me out with some chick. Like I'd want to go out without him or something."
"You go out without him all the time," Carlos said.
"When I'm out of town!"
"Or when you just feel like going out," Kendall reminded him. "You're way more of a partier than he is. He probably just wanted you to have a good time."
"I'd have a good time with him."
"Not out dancing," Carlos said. "Logan hates it when you drag him out but you can't dance with him, anyway."
"Yeah, but..." James scowled at them. "It still sucks. I only came home to see him!"
"Oh, thanks a lot," Kendall said.
"You know what I mean. It's our anniversary, god damn it. And he wouldn't even take a few hours off to see me. Just a few!"
"Well, he can't," Carlos said. "I mean, the way the hospital treats interns is really awful, he works harder than me and Kendall put together. We never see him, either."
"If he works so damn much, you'd think he'd be able to get one afternoon off."
"They kind of need him, though. You know, so patients don't, like, die."
"There are other doctors!"
"Yeah, but..." Carlos looked over at Kendall helplessly, and Kendall rolled his eyes.
"Logan doesn't bitch when you leave to go on tour for four months," he said.
"He doesn't?" Somehow, that didn't make James feel better. Like, what, Logan didn't even care when he was gone?
"Well..." Kendall shrugged. "He does, actually, kind of a lot. But he doesn't ask you to stay, is my point. So you asking him to ditch his work is really not fair."
"But I only came back to see him this weekend --"
"James." Carlos again. "We love you, bro, and Logan being busy totally blows, and we all know it. Logan especially knows it. But are you really gonna complain that he's busy with a career he loves when you, you know, are always out of town for your career that you love?"
"But --"
Kendall broke in. "And are you really complaining that Logan wanted you to have a good time without him? When, no offense, but you're the one who's keeping your relationship totally on the DL and he couldn't go out with you if he wanted to?"
"That's..." James took a deep breath. "That's really not the point, okay? This weekend was supposed to be about us."
Kendall and Carlos exchanged a look, and neither one of them looked very happy. But Carlos just said, "Okay." And let it drop.
--
Before dropping him back home, Kendall looked over at James and said, "I'm supposed to pick Logan up in a couple hours. But he only asked me because you were out of town. So..."
"Yeah," James said. Thinking about Logan made his chest feel tight but also made his blood pump too hard, angry and miserable all at once, but it was still their anniversary. "I'll take care of it."
"Okay." Kendall paused. "It really does suck, James. And I'm not saying you shouldn't be pissed at Logan. I would be."
"Thank you. Jesus."
"But," Kendall continued quickly, "screwing up something like this also isn't like Logan. He must be seriously stressed out for this to happen. That's all I'm saying. But anyway, yeah, he should be done between one and two sometime."
James knew a lecture when he heard one and rolled his eyes. "Whatever."
"Just sayin'."
"Bye." He opened the door. Then, because he wasn't a total jerk, he added, "Thanks for breakfast."
Kendall rolled his eyes.
--
The thing was, it was their anniversary. James knew Logan would really just want to pass out, but he also knew Logan probably wouldn't have eaten much in the last day and would need sustenance to avoid death. So he ran out to get a giant tray of sushi, stacked with all of Logan's favorites, stashed it in the otherwise-bare fridge, then showered and got his face on. He dressed casual-but-hot and set out for the hospital, the once again grabbed a table in the coffeeshop. It was busier now, and a lot of people did doubletakes when they saw him. James tried not to let it go to his head, but now on his third solo album, he was pretty famous.
He texted Logan, Told K Id take u home myself, waiting in coffeeshop, c u soon :)
A little after one, he got a message back: I'm trying to get out of here but there's still so much to do. I'll be there as soon as I can.
Even when stressed, Logan texted complete sentences. James rolled his eyes fondly and waited, sipping his drink. It was nearly two before Logan walked in, shuffling like a zombie, obviously barely keeping his eyes open. James sprang up and called his name, then manipulated Logan down into the chair he'd just abandoned. "You need coffee. Stat. That's what you doctors say, right?"
Logan gave him a smile that was exhausted down to his dimples. "That's the one."
James hurried up to the counter to get Logan's drink. By the time he got back to the table, Logan had his arms folded across it and his head resting on his arms. "Hey. Here," James said.
Logan accepted the coffee, inhaled half of it, and then gave him another smile. "Thank you so much. You are amazing. Can we go home?"
"Of course." James gave Logan a hand up, paused to wave at the barista who'd made their drinks, and headed out. "You look kind of dead."
"I feel kind of dead. I got..." He rubbed his forehead with his free hand, "I dunno, an hour of sleep? Maybe an hour and a half? And the on call room is not exactly restful, so I'm kinda... kinda out of it."
They slid into the car. Logan drank some more coffee and then put the cup into a holder, pulled on his seatbet, leaned back, and shut his eyes. James glanced at him as he pulled out of the parking spot, and almost did a doubletake. Obviously Logan was tired, but seeing him like that -- eyes shut with deep bags under them, stubbly, his hair a wreck and his clothes wrinkled, and so tense it looked like he might shatter -- brought back dozens of memories of Logan passed out in tour busses, in limos, in chairs, anywhere he could sleep. They had all been like that, conking out whenever the got a chance on tour, because sleep was a very, very rare thing. And James still functioned like that a lot of the time, but Logan didn't. Not usually, anyway.
He tried to ignore the memory of what Kendall said, that Logan had to be insanely stressed and exhausted to have screwed up their schedules. Instead, he took a deep breath and reminded himself of how desperate he'd been yesterday, when all he'd wanted was Logan and a nap.
He sighed. "I'll wake you when we get home."
Logan pried his eyes open. "I can stay aw..." He yawned. "I want to see you. I can try."
"Don't." James reached over to squeeze Logan's shoulder, just for a second. "Seriously, you need the sleep."
Logan nodded a little. "Thanks for picking me up."
"No problem."
Logan's eyes were shut by the end of the block.
--
When they arrived home, Logan gamely pretended to be excited about lunch, sat at the table, and managed not to fall asleep and land face-first on the tray of sushi rolls James had ordered. James appreciated the effort, though most of the sushi ended up back in the fridge, since Logan wasn't even that hungry.
But he still looked at James with his dark eyes and said, "Thanks. That was really sweet of you."
James shrugged. He knew that was Logan's peace offering, sitting up for lunch and trying to stay upright when he looked like he was about to collapse. Because he did want to see James. So James took it for what it was and answered, "No big."
Logan stared at him for a long minute, then took his hand and tugged him towards the bedroom. "It's our anniversary. I can stay awake for at least a little bit longer, right?"
James grinned as Logan pulled him down on to the bed and kissed him. Logan tasted like coffee -- he always did -- and James tingled with warmth, with quiet anticipation, and rolled over to rummage in his bedside drawer for a bottle of lube.
By time he turned back around, Logan's eyes where shut. James couldn't help himself. It was ridiculous, so he laughed as he stripped down to his boxers anyway. Logan stirred. "What's... did I fall asleep? Shit, no, I'm awake. James, I am."
"No. You're not."
"I can, though. It's our anniversary, and..." Logan yawned. "And you came all the way home to see me."
James sighed. "Yeah, but I don't want you to pass out when we're screwing. Let's just... just take a nap." He slid down the sheet and slid under it.
Logan didn't need any more prompting than that. He kicked off his pants and crawled in next to James, who snaked an arm under him to pull him close. Logan curled up, head on James' shoulder, but said, "Wake me in a few hours, okay? I mean it. I just need a," yawn, "a nap, and then... you and me. Dinner, something nice. My treat."
"Okay," James said, and pulled Logan close.
Logan was asleep again moments later, his breathing steady and even. And maybe this wasn't exactly an exciting anniversary, but god damn it, James was on vacation, and Logan was here. It wasn't anything like the anniversary James had imagined, but at least napping with Logan in his arms felt better.
--
James woke to distant beeping. He frowned into the dim room and disentangled himself from Logan, who didn't even stir. It was later now, almost seven, and if he was going to get any real time with Logan, he needed to wake up.
He followed the sound of the beeping down the hall and to the kitchen, where Logan's phone was sitting on the table, left there after their attempt at lunch. He reached to silence it and found a reminder flashing across the screen: Don't forget! Drop J's delicates off for cleaning & air out dresser & closet!
He blinked, closed the message, and opened Logan's freakishly well organized reminder system. Scrolling through notes for the next few days, he found:
Don't forget! Clean out the fridge & buy real food for J!
Don't forget! Cuda products on sale -- stock up for J!
Don't forget! Confirm dinner reservations, table must be DISCRETE!
Don't forget! Call boys about Sunday brunch??
And finally, Don't forget! J's flight gets in at 3!!!!
James stared, feeling almost dizzy. Maybe Logan had screwed up the dates, but James had never even thought about everything Logan did before he got home. He always came home to a clean, bright mansion, with a fridge full of his favorites, his products fully stocked in the bathroom, clean clothes, clean sheets, and his boyfriend waiting at the luggage return with a smile and a friendly hug because they couldn't kiss in public.
Logan did all that for him, despite his own hectic schedule. And apparently he did it every single time James came home, even if it was just for a few days, even in the midst of a weekend schedule from hell that he'd put together just so he could get a few days free.
He swallowed, throat gone dry with guilt. He'd been so annoyed by the whole weekend, pissed off when Logan had been planning all of this. Small stuff, but lots of it, just to make him comfortable. Stuff he never even noticed, that he'd certainly never thanked Logan for, but that Logan did anyway, because...
Because Logan loved him.
James set the phone down guiltily and padded back to the bedroom. He wanted to see Logan, actually spend some time with him, but Logan needed the sleep. The patients and everyone else who counted on Logan needed him to get the sleep so he could be sharp and coherent for them. So James just stood there in the doorway, staring at Logan in the dim light, and smiled. Then he walked back to the living room to chill out by himself -- if Logan woke up, great, and if not, well, that was fine.
But James did go get Logan's phone and plug it in. Then he opened up the reminder system again and began to play.
--
An alarm screeched and James jolted upright in bed. Next to him, Logan said, "Shit, shit, shit!" and practically vaulted out of the sheets.
James looked at the clock. It was quarter after seven in the morning. "Logan?"
"That's my -- my last alarm, where the hell is my phone? It should have been ringing an hour ago!"
"Oh, shit, sorry," James said. "I found it in the kitchen last night, I plugged it in out there. I must have turned it off by accident or something."
Logan looked pissed off for about half a second, then guilty, and he groaned. "You were going to wake me up last night!"
"You needed the sleep." James shrugged.
"But it was our anniversary --"
"Yeah, but we're going to have, like, what? Forty or fifty more of those? It's no big deal, Logan, seriously. I'm sorry I've been so..." He shrugged.
Logan stared at him, eyes wide, then repeated, "Forty or fifty more?"
"Well, yeah. I'm not planning on breaking up with you any time soon, so..."
Logan climbed back on to the bed, grabbed James' shoulder, and kissed him. Which now tasted like coffee and morning breath, and should have been gross, but it wasn't because it was Logan, and James loved him even when he was disgusting. But Logan pulled away after a second.
"I love you. But I should already be on my way out the door. I'd skip if I could, I really would, but..."
James pulled away too. "Go shower. I'll make coffee and find you breakfast."
Logan threw him a grateful look and then ran towards the bathroom. James pulled himself out of bed, stretched for a second, and hurried to the kitchen. The coffee maker was some kind of huge, fancy machine that he barely understood, but even he had worked out how to make a simple pot of coffee. He grabbed a travel mug from the cabinet, poured some cereal into Tupperware, grabbed an orange from a fruit bowl on the counter, double checked that it wasn't plastic, and then stuck some of the previous day's leftovers in a bag.
He had the whole thing ready to go when Logan stumbled out, dressed but still damp. He hadn't even bothered with hair product, which meant his hair was going to be ridiculous and fluffy all day.
James presented him with the packed breakfast and mug of coffee and kissed his cheek. "Have a good day. Save lives. Be awesome."
Logan chuckled a tiny bit, then kissed him, his mouth minty-fresh. Though he took a gulp of coffee a second later. "I'll do my best. Text me when your flight lands."
James nodded. "And don't forget your phone." He handed it to Logan and pushed him towards the door.
But Logan paused to kiss him again -- there was the coffee breath -- and said, "Thank you. I love you."
"Duh." James grinned. "I love you too. Now get going, Doctor Mitchell."
Logan hurried out the door and James watched him go, smiling a little. It wasn't exactly the anniversary weekend he'd hoped for, but he'd take it.
--
James was lying on the couch, staring at some daytime talk show and waiting for the car he'd called to come pick him up, when the door opened and someone entered the security code to stop it from beeping. He sat up, glancing down the hall, wondering who it was. They had a housekeeper, Kendall and Carlos both had keys and the security code, and of course Logan...
Logan walked up the hall and stopped, looking down at him. James blinked. Logan shouldn't have been home for hours, if he was doing a double shift, but there he was. And he broke into a huge smile. "Thank god, I thought I might have missed you. Who's giving you a ride to the airport?"
"A car service. What's --"
"When?"
"About twenty minutes. Logan --"
"Call and cancel it, I'll drive you. I need to brush my teeth."
With that, Logan hurried past him, towards the bedroom with the master bath. "What?" James yelled after him.
"Just do it!" Logan yelled back.
So James did, scrambling for his phone. He apologized, agreed to pay the cancellation fee since the car was already on the way, and then hurried to the bedroom. The bathroom door was open, and Logan was indeed brushing his teeth. He finally finished, put his toothbrush away, and rinsed his mouth.
"Logan, what's --"
That was as far as he got before Logan grabbed him, hauling him close by the shirt, and kissed him, hard and desperate. James moaned, sinking into it, shuddering at the way two days' worth of Logan's stubble scraped his chin. And when Logan finally came up for air, he shoved James back against the bathroom door, body still pressed against James' shoulder to hip. But his hands went south, momentarily cupping James' dick before undoing his belt, his fly, and pushing James' pants down.
James moaned into Logan's ear, having a hard time catching his breath with Logan right there. But as Logan pushed his boxers down, James managed, "Not that I'm not glad to see you, but what... what happened to work?"
Logan's hands dug into James' side, nails scraping his skin. "We have seventeen minutes. Talk later, fuck me now."
"Fuck, Logan," James hissed, his whole body going hot and on-edge, because since when did Logan talk like that? For that matter, since when did Logan shove him up against doors?
Not that James was going to complain about it.
"Yes. Fuck Logan," Logan agreed, and this time when he hauled James around it was to push him back into the bedroom. James stumbled, stepping out of his clothes as he rushed towards the bed. Logan followed a little bit more slowly -- no, not slowly. Just purposefully. James landed on the bed and twisted around to see Logan, who waited to have his full attention before pulling off his shirt, the sight reminding James that for all Logan had always been a nerd, he'd also always been an athlete. Logan was fit and muscular and gorgeous.
Maybe James had just been out of town too long, gone too many months without sex or something. But all he could really do was sit there and gape at Logan.
At least, until Logan finally walked the rest of the way to the bed and pushed James down on to his back, climbed over him and straddled his thighs. James moaned as Logan wrapped a hand around James' dick, and then his own, and the moan went high as Logan jerked them both, pulling harder than James usually liked but god damn it was perfect somehow. He pushed himself up onto his elbows and watched, gaze skipping back and forth from Logan's hands to his face, reveling in the dark intensity and concentration written in Logan's expression, in having that fixed on him.
"God," James mumbled. "You're so fucking hot like this. I want," he paused to breathe, his chest heaving, "want you so fucking much."
Logan smirked down at him, his dimples suddenly sexy instead of boyish, and James reached for him, pulling him into a kiss. Logan shifted, freeing his arms so he could push his hands against James' shoulders, pinning him down. Logan thrust against him, their bodies aligned so James' dick slid against Logan's.
Logan pulled his mouth away from James' and mumbled against James' ear, "I need you in me so fucking bad."
James kissed him and reached towards the side of the bed, groping blindly for the drawer where they kept a bottle of KY. He managed to get it out and snapped it open one-handed.
"You want to?" James asked. "Or do you want me to?"
"What do you want?" Logan asked.
James started to say he'd stretch Logan, but when he looked back up at Logan's face he changed his mind: "I want to watch you."
Logan's eyes went wide, but he grinned down at James. "Well. Okay, then." He kissed James again and took the lube from his hand, then crawled towards the head of the bed. He coated one hand, then leaned forward, bracing himself against the headboard with the other, and twisted around. It was a little bit awkward, but he kept his gaze fixed on James as he fingered himself. James just stared at the sight of Logan's fingers pressing deeper, moving, as he stretched. He almost grimaced, but after a minute the sharp lines of his face softened and his breath started to come in uneven pants. As he carefully added a third finger and pressed deeper, he caught James' gaze again and licked his lips. "This is," he moaned, "you watching is," another moan, "I think about you all the, all the goddamn time, every time I... every time."
James swallowed, staring at him, thinking about it. About Logan jerking off and yelling his name into the empty room, about Logan fucking himself like this, alone on the bed but imagining James. He couldn't help himself: he surged forward and wrapped his arms around Logan, kissed his neck, bit his ear. It was a little awkward with the way Logan was twisted, and Logan had to stop what he was doing -- but maybe that was okay, because he leaned in to kiss James, clutching him desperately.
"I'm ready," Logan said, voice low and gravely, untwisting in James' grip.
James grabbed Logan's shoulders and pressed him into the headboard, facing the wall, and kissed the back of his neck. He used the lube to slick himself up, but Logan was mumbling, "Come on, James, come on," like he couldn't wait another second. James wrapped one arm around Logan to hold himself steady, and his other hand to align himself. Logan looked over his shoulder, his smirk just begging for it, so James pressed inside.
Logan was tight and hot, clinging to the headboard with his free hand, but his breath caught and his eyelashes fluttered when James was barely inside. James waited for him to adjust but Logan reached back for his hip, squeezing it, and babbled, "More, James, god, more, please." So James pressed in further, and even though Logan went silent, grimacing, he still urged James on with the hand on his hip.
James found a rhythm, slow but deep enough to make Logan's body go tense with every thrust, and he grabbed Logan's hand from his hip to bring it up to the headboard. Then, both hands over Logan's and bracing himself, he sped up. Logan twisted again, just far enough to kiss him, moaning into his mouth, low against the thumping of the headboard into the wall.
He slowed down again, realizing he was crushing Logan against the headboard. But Logan raised his eyebrows, his forehead sweaty, and said, "What's the matter?"
James dropped a hand to Logan's hip, around to his dick. "You okay?"
"Seriously?" Logan smirked. "I'm not made of glass. I won't break. And I want to fucking feel this for a week."
James' voice went low: "Then have it your way."
He pulled out of Logan, drawing back from the headboard, and nudged Logan down towards the mattress, following him once he moved. But Logan grabbed him and rolled, their legs tangling together as Logan gripped his upper arm. And somehow James was the one on his back, but he couldn't exactly complain, because a moment later Logan was on top of him, staring down at him as he straddled James, and holy fuck. Logan had to twist a little to see what he was doing, but it only took a second before he sank down onto James, his head thrown back and his shoulders heaving.
"Fuck," James grunted, staring up at him, his body quivering. Logan was moving slowly, still clutching James' arm, but James' mind rang with the way Logan's voice had gone all growly and deep when he'd said he wanted to feel this. So James grabbed for Logan's hips, nudging down insistently, and slammed his own hips up.
Logan let out a strangled, "Jesus--!" but aside from his fingers digging into James' shoulder, he didn't object. Just shifted back upwards and the next time he slid down, it was harder and faster, meeting James deliberately, matching him thrust for thrust.
Logan's free hand went to his dick, matching the same up-down-up-down, better rhythm than he'd ever had dancing -- but when he started to lose it, his moans trailing off into deep breaths, James knew exactly how close he was. He reached up to put a hand on Logan's jaw, said, "Look at me, babe," and as they locked eyes, Logan came, quivering around James' cock.
James pulled out of him, catching his breath while Logan did, slumping down against his chest. But Logan only drooped for a few seconds. Then he leaned down to kiss James hard on the mouth, mumbled into his jaw, "You, too. I want to see you -- want to feel you come, James, come on, please."
How could he resist that? Grinning, James wrapped his arms around Logan and rolled over, and though Logan gasped a little, he nodded too. He pulled James down on top of him as he dug his feet into the mattress, spreading his legs, opening himself up. James took a second to lube up again, and it was an easier slide inside this time. Logan gasped again, hands digging into James' shoulders so hard they might bruise, but even oversensitive and spent, Logan bucked up against James, meeting his body. Between hot kisses to James' neck and shoulders, he kept mumbling, "Come on, fuck, James, I want you to come inside me, want to feel it, need you, oh god, James, James." James had never heard him like that before -- he was usually quieter, he usually let James take the lead, he usually waited for James to start things.
But Jesus, Logan shoving James against walls and demanding to be fucked, Logan pinning him down and riding him, Logan all but begging him to come -- wherever this had come from, it was amazing. When Logan bit his shoulder, James was done. He came in a rush, buried as deep inside Logan as he could, Logan's name falling from his lips.
James went boneless and collapsed on top of Logan, who kissed him again and murmured, "Hey."
Maybe he wasn't made of glass and he wasn't going to break, but still, as soon as James caught his breath he shifted off of Logan to make sure he could breathe. But he did mold himself to Logan's side, head resting on Logan's shoulder. He knew he needed to move, they both needed to clean up and get going to the airport, but he just couldn't bring himself to.
Instead he said, "Wow."
Logan grinned at him, whatever fervor had driven him before faded. This was the Logan he was used to, whose dimples were always going to make him look playful and boyish. "Yeah?"
"Yeah. You... Wow. What brought that on?"
Logan sat up, winced, and rolled over on to his knees to reach for a box of tissues. "I hate to say it, but we can talk in the car. We'd better..."
"Yeah." James couldn't bring himself to scowl, though, not while he was still reeling. "But just, for future reference, damn, Logan."
Logan grinned at him from over his shoulder as he headed towards the bathroom, walking slowly. James finally forced himself up, cleaned himself off and used another few tissues to wipe the sweat off his face. He desperately wished that he had time to shower, but they only had about a minute before they were supposed to go, and if he missed his flight, Kelly would actually murder him. He had two interviews as soon as he landed and a club appearance later that night...
He was digging through his luggage to find his deodorant when Logan came back out. He began pulling on clothing, hissing a little bit as he moved.
"You okay?" James asked.
"Yeah, just sore. Been awhile since I've had a workout like that." He gave James an especially cheesy grin as he said it.
James chuckled and finally started getting dressed himself, though clothing against his still-sweaty skin was not exactly appealing. He forced himself into it anyway and said, "So now that we've fucked, are you going to talk to me?"
Logan laughed awkwardly. "Yeah, uh, sure. I just -- we didn't have a lot of time."
"I know." James kissed him the cheek, then pulled his shirt on. "So what happened to the hospital?"
"Well..." Logan ducked his head a little, then pulled his phone out of his pocket. "I was maybe sulking all morning because the weekend was so... what it was. And then my phone gives me this reminder I don't remember programming in."
He gave James a meaningful look and handed over his phone. James glanced at the screen, then away, a little bit embarrassed. "I must have put it in wrong. It was supposed to go off tonight, when you get off your shift, I thought... I thought you could use a pick-me-up or something."
Logan grinned down at him, reading it again. James had just casually stuck it in with all of his other notes: Don't forget! J loves you!!
They started out of the door, James wheeling his suitcase and Logan hauling his carryon. They loaded them into Logan's car and James got in, watching as Logan winced hugely as he sat down. "You okay?"
"Yeaaaah, just." He shifted, trying to get comfortable, and evidently failed, judging by the grimace on his face. "Maybe offering to drive you right after we fuck was not my greatest plan. Jesus, I might actually feel this for a week."
"You said..."
"I know." Logan looked over at him, grimace replaced by a smirk, before pulling out of the driveway. "And I meant it. There was no way I was going to let you leave without us getting it on."
"So what," James mused, "you saw one little note on your phone, skipped out on the job you've been dreaming about since you were eight, and came home to have sex with me? Because babe, if that's all I have to do, you might as well move into my tour bus. You're never getting out of bed again."
"Really, really tempting," Logan said. "I could just lie around, make you bring me food, catch up on some reading while you're busy, and have sex with you all the time. Why did I go to med school again? Whose idea was this whole doctor thing?"
"But you love being a doctor," James said, then considered it. "I guess I could give up my career. Stay at home as your live-in boyfriend, spend my days lounging by the pool, have dinner on the table when you get home, and have sex with you all the time."
"Have dinner ready for me? You can't cook," Logan reminded him.
"If I wasn't busy with a career, I could learn."
"I like this plan," Logan said. Then added, "But you love singing."
"I do." James sighed. "I just don't love being away from you so much."
"Yeah, well I don't love working too much to see you when you're here."
James considered it for a second, then shrugged. "I guess this is just what happens when two incredibly busy people fall in love. But... my tour doesn't last forever, and when I'm back in town to record..."
"Yeah, and when I finish my internship, I might be able to wrangle a position that's got slightly more regular hours." Logan looked over at him. "I really am sorry about this weekend --"
"It was a fuck up. It happens. Even to geniuses," James interrupted. "So stop apologizing because I'm not mad and I forgive you. And... I kind of can't believe you ditched work for me. You've never ditched anything in your life."
"Yeah, and it wasn't easy." Logan laughed. "You're going to be so grossed out by this. But we were so understaffed I couldn't just leave, and since it's not like I could explain what had happened..."
James swallowed a tiny knot of guilt at that. It wasn't that he didn't want to come out publicly about his relationship with Logan, but he had no idea what it would do to his career. Plus, Logan liked his privacy, and they both knew that when James finally did come out, it would be a paparazzi storm. So for now, he wasn't planning to. But someday...
"So what did you do?" James asked.
"Faked food poisoning," Logan said. "Lyss saw me eating sushi, and a few minutes later I told her I wasn't feeling so hot... She drew her own conclusions when I puked."
James did a doubletake. "You what? Oh my god, are you okay?"
"I'm fine." Logan chuckled. "Do you remember when we were in fourth grade and Carlos ate those berries and I had to call poison control?"
"I thought he was going to die," James remembered. Kendall was the one who'd realized the berries were poisonous, since his mom had told him to never let Katie near them, but Carlos had already downed a bunch of them, and was lying on the ground, moaning. They'd all freaked out, sure Carlos was poisoned and going to keel over at any moment, but Logan had managed to call 9-1-1.
"They made him puke," Logan continued. "No one really uses ipecac anymore, but we keep it at the hospital just in case, so..."
"So you made yourself puke?"
"Yeah," Logan said, making a face. "I just took a little, Lyss saw me vomit, I told her I thought maybe the sushi was bad... then I puked on her shoes and, well, she practically threw me out, said she'd cover my patients until they could find someone to get there and take over for me."
"Gross."
"That's why I was afraid I wouldn't be home in time," Logan said. "I had to pull over a few times, you know, uh, get the rest of it out of my system. But by the time I got there..."
"You just had to brush your teeth," James realized.
"Right. And then not tell you I'd just vomited on the side of the road, because I still wanted you to have sex with me, and post-vomit is not sexy on anyone."
"You were worried about that?" James shook his head a little. "Logan, you ditched work for me. Puke or no, I'd still be hot for you."
"That's... kind of romantic. Disgusting, but kind of romantic."
"Says the guy who actually did all the puking."
Logan shrugged. "I was just glad it stopped before I got home. Kinda would have put a damper on the whole sex thing. And babe, I really, really wanted sex."
"Yeah, you made that really obvious." James rubbed his cheek, where he could still feel the stubble burn. "Which was fucking fantastic, by the way. In case you were wondering."
Logan's cheeks went a little red, but he said, "It was, wasn't it?"
"Mmhmm. Hey. Hey, you're free next weekend, right?" At Logan's nod, he continued, "Do you want to fly out? I mean, I'm going to be busy, I get it if you don't want to bother --"
"I'll be there. I can actually get some reading done while you're doing events and we can make out in the car between them." Logan's grin was wide and gorgeous. "And I can watch you perform, and you know what that does to me, babe."
James swallowed, brushing a hand over his neck. The last time Logan had watched one of his shows, he'd apparently really liked the show, because he'd left James with a very hard-to-miss hickey. The press speculated about James' lovelife all the time -- he'd been linked to plenty of starlets, thanks to his excellent PR people, and he knew the (mostly accurate) gay rumors were out there -- but that hickey had definitely set off another round.
"I'll get Kelly to send you my schedule," James promised, shifting over to put a hand on Logan's shoulder. "I wish I didn't have to go. I'll see what I can do, you know, schedule-wise, if I can get out of something so we can get some time together. Not that fast and rough isn't hot, but having more than twenty minutes would be nice, too."
"Yeah, it would. Really. But don't worry if you can't." He glanced over at James, eyes full of warmth. "I mean, we're going to have plenty of time together. Like, you know. Forty or fifty years. That's the rumor I hear, anyway."
James reached over to ruffle Logan's ridiculous, fluffy hair, and said, "Yeah. Forty or fifty years. At least."