Please Use Your Eyes, Thank You Very Much, Good Day
Dear Customer:
Please, take a moment to feast your eyes on our wonderful bookstore, filled with entertaining books. They are, as you may have noticed, similar to the variety you find in independent bookstores everywhere. We have shelves of cookbooks, popular fiction, and a myriad of academic topics, in addition to any number of less informative tomes. We have tchotchkes and extremely overpriced pretentious notebooks. It's what we sell in this section of our department-store like building. Isn't it lovely?
The downscalator is next to the upscalator. If you look around you, you will not see any school supplies. Nor will you see text books. This indicates, to the critical eye, that this is not the place where you will find them. If you want to know where they are, ask us where they are, not if we sell them, because... we don't. As anyone with functioning eyes could tell you. There is, in fact, a sign for both the restrooms and the textbooks.
We don't have university merchandise - that's on the other side of the store. The one, you know, that's covered in blue and the university insignia. We don't sell electronics - that is, as a matter of fact, in the electronics shop, down that downscalator you can't find. Which there is a sign to. By the downscalator. Which is dead center and right in front of you when you come in the doors.
The front desk, is, you know, by the front. Where you come in. Because the front is obviously not a balcony - that would be silly. Moreover, there are no desks there. So yes. Go to the place where you can walk out of the building and you will find the front desk.
Course packs are also textbooks.
Thank you.
Please, take a moment to feast your eyes on our wonderful bookstore, filled with entertaining books. They are, as you may have noticed, similar to the variety you find in independent bookstores everywhere. We have shelves of cookbooks, popular fiction, and a myriad of academic topics, in addition to any number of less informative tomes. We have tchotchkes and extremely overpriced pretentious notebooks. It's what we sell in this section of our department-store like building. Isn't it lovely?
The downscalator is next to the upscalator. If you look around you, you will not see any school supplies. Nor will you see text books. This indicates, to the critical eye, that this is not the place where you will find them. If you want to know where they are, ask us where they are, not if we sell them, because... we don't. As anyone with functioning eyes could tell you. There is, in fact, a sign for both the restrooms and the textbooks.
We don't have university merchandise - that's on the other side of the store. The one, you know, that's covered in blue and the university insignia. We don't sell electronics - that is, as a matter of fact, in the electronics shop, down that downscalator you can't find. Which there is a sign to. By the downscalator. Which is dead center and right in front of you when you come in the doors.
The front desk, is, you know, by the front. Where you come in. Because the front is obviously not a balcony - that would be silly. Moreover, there are no desks there. So yes. Go to the place where you can walk out of the building and you will find the front desk.
Course packs are also textbooks.
Thank you.