I Will Hold You All Night, I Will Make It All Right
Title: I Will Hold You All Night, I Will Make It All Right
Fandom: Elite
Characters: Rebe, Mencia
Pairings: Rebe/Mencia
Warnings: Mention of character death, spoilers for all of season 4
Summary: Rebe comforts Mencia when she has nightmares of Armando, unable to admit to the nightmares of her own.
Mencia awakens in the night, screaming Armando’s name; she’s had the nightmare again.
From what she tells Rebe, the nightmares all tend to follow a similar theme; sometimes Armando is chasing her through the Lake Club, sometimes Mencia sees herself falling into the water as Ari did with Armando standing over her. When Mencia wakes, Rebe is there to hold her, to tell her it’s all just a bad dream, Rebe is there now and Armando won’t hurt her again. Most nights Rebe is able to calm her, to soothe her back to sleep, then lies awake herself for a long time afterwards, thinking about something Mencia had said once after one of those dreams.
“It’s the not knowing that’s the problem. No one’s seen or heard anything of him since New Year’s. At least if they found him, if anyone knew where he was, I might be able to get some closure on him.”
There’s a part of Rebe that sometimes wishes she could tell Mencia not to worry, that Armando can never hurt her any more, that she, Guzman and Samuel had taken care of that. Maybe if Mencia did have that closure, she would be able to sleep through the night without the nightmare. But she knows she never can; she, Guzman and Samuel had agreed they would never speak of it again and never even tell Cayetana or Omar, and besides, Guzman has suffered enough. He deserves this chance to get away, to travel the world with Ander; Rebe isn’t going to be the one to ruin that for him, to cause him to be constantly looking over his shoulder like Samuel’s brother, waiting for the moment when his world will come crashing down, his freedoms taken away from him. If Rebe speaks, she knows she risks exactly that happening to him.
And she fears the look in Mencia’s eyes if she ever does tell her exactly what happened to Armando; it may not have been Rebe who pulled the trigger, but his blood is on her hands, she was still responsible for disposing of him. If Mencia ever knows what Rebe did, she will look at her with that same fear in her eyes that she gets every time she thinks of Armando, will pull away from her, and Rebe will lose her.
Rebe can never tell Mencia that she has nightmares of her own, nightmares where Armando rises from the water to come after her, threatening her that he will show himself to Mencia and tell her what really happened to him. She tells herself every time she wakes that it’s only a nightmare, that she and the guys weighed him down well enough that he shouldn’t resurface. (Then she tries to stop herself thinking about the way that Polo and that Christian guy had thought the trophy that Polo killed Guzman’s sister with would never resurface either, and wondering what might have happened had Cayetana not hidden it). Armando’s never coming back; Mencia may never get the closure she wants, but this way, Mencia never has to know of Rebe’s involvement in his death. Yet at the same time, Rebe thinks of how even in death, Armando continues to drive a wedge between them as he had in life, because Rebe now has a secret she must always keep from Mencia, has to listen to Mencia talking about her need for closure while knowing that she is the reason why this can never happen. All Rebe can do is continue to comfort Mencia as she has the nightmares, and find her own way of dealing with her own.
Fandom: Elite
Characters: Rebe, Mencia
Pairings: Rebe/Mencia
Warnings: Mention of character death, spoilers for all of season 4
Summary: Rebe comforts Mencia when she has nightmares of Armando, unable to admit to the nightmares of her own.
Mencia awakens in the night, screaming Armando’s name; she’s had the nightmare again.
From what she tells Rebe, the nightmares all tend to follow a similar theme; sometimes Armando is chasing her through the Lake Club, sometimes Mencia sees herself falling into the water as Ari did with Armando standing over her. When Mencia wakes, Rebe is there to hold her, to tell her it’s all just a bad dream, Rebe is there now and Armando won’t hurt her again. Most nights Rebe is able to calm her, to soothe her back to sleep, then lies awake herself for a long time afterwards, thinking about something Mencia had said once after one of those dreams.
“It’s the not knowing that’s the problem. No one’s seen or heard anything of him since New Year’s. At least if they found him, if anyone knew where he was, I might be able to get some closure on him.”
There’s a part of Rebe that sometimes wishes she could tell Mencia not to worry, that Armando can never hurt her any more, that she, Guzman and Samuel had taken care of that. Maybe if Mencia did have that closure, she would be able to sleep through the night without the nightmare. But she knows she never can; she, Guzman and Samuel had agreed they would never speak of it again and never even tell Cayetana or Omar, and besides, Guzman has suffered enough. He deserves this chance to get away, to travel the world with Ander; Rebe isn’t going to be the one to ruin that for him, to cause him to be constantly looking over his shoulder like Samuel’s brother, waiting for the moment when his world will come crashing down, his freedoms taken away from him. If Rebe speaks, she knows she risks exactly that happening to him.
And she fears the look in Mencia’s eyes if she ever does tell her exactly what happened to Armando; it may not have been Rebe who pulled the trigger, but his blood is on her hands, she was still responsible for disposing of him. If Mencia ever knows what Rebe did, she will look at her with that same fear in her eyes that she gets every time she thinks of Armando, will pull away from her, and Rebe will lose her.
Rebe can never tell Mencia that she has nightmares of her own, nightmares where Armando rises from the water to come after her, threatening her that he will show himself to Mencia and tell her what really happened to him. She tells herself every time she wakes that it’s only a nightmare, that she and the guys weighed him down well enough that he shouldn’t resurface. (Then she tries to stop herself thinking about the way that Polo and that Christian guy had thought the trophy that Polo killed Guzman’s sister with would never resurface either, and wondering what might have happened had Cayetana not hidden it). Armando’s never coming back; Mencia may never get the closure she wants, but this way, Mencia never has to know of Rebe’s involvement in his death. Yet at the same time, Rebe thinks of how even in death, Armando continues to drive a wedge between them as he had in life, because Rebe now has a secret she must always keep from Mencia, has to listen to Mencia talking about her need for closure while knowing that she is the reason why this can never happen. All Rebe can do is continue to comfort Mencia as she has the nightmares, and find her own way of dealing with her own.