Homecoming Night
Title: Homecoming Night
Fandom: Riverdale
Characters: FP, Fred, Alice, Hermione, Penelope, Hiram. Hal and Mary will feature in a later chapter
Pairings: Hermione/Hiram, references to past Fred/Hermione, later will be Alice/FP and Alice/Hal.
Rating: PG
Warnings: Spoilers for all aired so far.
Summary: What really happened at Homecoming in the parents' year. FP and Fred's prank on Hiram could have unforeseen consequences, Penelope has her heart set on homecoming queen, while Alice is keeping a secret from all her friends.
“Looking good,” FP Jones said as he looked at the poster for their band playing at the homecoming dance, which Fred had just pinned to the notice board.
“Just wish it wasn’t pinned up next to that,” Fred replied, gesturing towards another poster advertising the upcoming wrestling match against Southside High, featuring Hiram “The Ram” Lodge.
FP stepped over to the poster and ripped it down from the notice board, ripping it in half. “There,” he grinned. “Now it’s not. And any more of those I see, I’ll either rip them in half too, or put our posters all over them so no one has to look at his smirking face. But I doubt it’s gonna last with him and Hermione. Hiram Lodge has a different girl hanging off his arm every week. You should have heard Alice talking about him the other day. ‘I bet his wrestling career isn’t the only reason he calls himself The Ram’,” he said in an uncanny impression.
“Since when do you keep quoting Alice?” Fred asked.
“Since she’s right about this jackass,” FP began, but Fred wasn’t buying that.
“I’m not so sure it’s about Hiram. Even before Hermione and I broke up, you were talking about her a lot,” Fred went on. “Anything you wanna share with me?”
FP laughed a little too loud and a little too long. “Me and Alice? Yeah, whatever. Besides, she’s going to the dance with Stepford Cooper, and everyone knows it. As for me, the fact that we’re providing the music means that we wouldn’t have time for dates on the night even if we had them. Anyway, gonna go and do some more ripping up Hiram. Catch you later.”
As Fred watched FP go, he wasn’t so sure he entirely bought FP’s explanation.
As Alice listened to Penelope droning on about how important it was that as the nominees for homecoming queen, it was vital they all made a good impression, a part of her wanted to take that chocolate malted and dump it over her head.
It still didn’t quite feel real to Alice that she had ever been nominated for homecoming queen at all, and she suspected a large part of that was down to the fact that she was going as Hal Cooper’s date, rather than on her own merits. A year ago, she most likely wouldn’t have even been attending, wouldn’t have been seen dead there, preferring to be downing Snakebite at the Whyte Wyrm with her fellow Serpents. But that time was behind her now. She’d shed her skin, no matter what FP said, practiced getting her makeup and accessories just right, looked sufficiently polished that no one would ever mistake her for a Serpent ever again. And yet sometimes she’d catch the likes of Penelope Merriwether looking at her as though they saw right through her mask to the person she was before, and were waiting for the right moment to bring her crashing down.
She knew that a large part of her acceptance came from the fact that she was dating Hal Cooper. Since everyone knew who he was, they automatically knew who she was, and lots of people (with the exception of those sat beside her right now) thought that she and Hal were a shoo in for homecoming king and queen. Penelope, however, thought that the fact that she was dating Cliff Blossom automatically guaranteed her victory. Alice barely knew the guy, but she knew that Hal couldn’t stand him, so she too steered clear.
“So as the future homecoming queen and ladies in waiting, and may the best girl win,” Penelope giggled, and Alice clutched at her glass again to prevent herself from throwing the contents at Penelope, “I think it’s important that we present a united front. I was thinking that maybe we should look at colour coordinating, maybe this shade of Precious Pink?” She thrust a magazine under the others’ noses.
“With your hair colour, I think you’re out of your mind,” Hermione smirked, raising an eyebrow at Alice.
Penelope flushed, but quickly recovered her composure as she turned towards the door. “Oh, look who’s here. I do hope Hiram wasn’t too upset about his posters?”
“What do you mean, Penelope?” Hermione asked.
“I caught that awful FP Jones ripping one to shreds this morning, and putting up his own posters for his band up over Hiram’s wrestling match posters,” Penelope explained. “I really don’t know what Principal Martinez was thinking letting his band perform at the Homecoming dance. Their kind of music,” that last word in air quotes, “really doesn’t fit with the theme at all, and even their name is ridiculous. The Fred-Heads? Why not just call themselves Trying Too Hard To Be Deadheads and have done with it?” She gestured over her shoulder to where Fred and FP had just walked in. As they looked over and spotted Hermione, FP whispered something to Fred, who shook his head and took a seat in a booth with his back to them.
Alice hastily shoved back her chair, ignored Hermione’s shriek of “Hey!” as her milkshake nearly went flying all over her, and ran to the bathroom, locking herself in a stall and vomiting.
“Alice? You okay? I just had to get out of there. If it isn’t Penelope showing off because Blossom’s probably gonna buy her votes, it’s FP and Fred and their stupid pissing contest with Hiram, and I know he’s not gonna take it well about the posters…Alice?” Hermione had walked into the bathroom just as Alice finished bringing up her entire chocolate malted.
Alice glanced up at her. “Don’t think that agreed with me. I have a lactose intolerance.”
Hermione stared at her. “If you have a lactose intolerance, why did you drink that whole milkshake?”
“Because Penelope already bought them all for everyone when I got here and I didn’t feel I could say no,” Alice explained.
“Take some lessons from me, sweetie,” Hermione suggested. “You just heard me say no to her Precious Puke. Stick with me, I’ll show you how to stand up to her.”
Alice forced a smile, struggled to her feet. Hermione seemed to have bought it. She couldn’t tell her why she’d really vomited, at least not now anyway. There was someone else she needed to tell first.
“There, that’s the last of them,” Hiram greeted Hermione the next morning as he taped another poster for his wrestling match right on top of the Fred-Heads poster.
“Let’s not stoop to their level,” Hermione suggested, moving the poster slightly to the left so the band poster was visible again. “Focus on your match, and then on taking me to the dance, not on some pissing match with my ex and his best friend.”
“Are you defending Fred?” Hiram asked. “Penelope caught them red handed.”
“She caught FP red handed, Hiram,” Hermione pointed out. “She didn’t catch Fred doing anything. And I’m also pointing out that I’m at least partly responsible for this situation. If I hadn’t left Fred for you in the first place, FP wouldn’t have felt the need to retaliate against you. Look, I’ll talk to Fred, see if I can get him to call off his little attack dog.”
“And if he doesn’t?” Hiram asked.
“He will. I’m confident of that. Just remember he is the injured party here, Hiram. Don’t go seeking any kind of revenge on him. Concentrate on your match, and on us.”
Hiram nodded. “Okay. I promise you.” He pulled Hermione into a hug, satisfied that he had kept her quiet for now. But he smiled to himself as he thought that while he had promised her he would lay off her ex, he had no intention of doing anything of the kind…
Fandom: Riverdale
Characters: FP, Fred, Alice, Hermione, Penelope, Hiram. Hal and Mary will feature in a later chapter
Pairings: Hermione/Hiram, references to past Fred/Hermione, later will be Alice/FP and Alice/Hal.
Rating: PG
Warnings: Spoilers for all aired so far.
Summary: What really happened at Homecoming in the parents' year. FP and Fred's prank on Hiram could have unforeseen consequences, Penelope has her heart set on homecoming queen, while Alice is keeping a secret from all her friends.
“Looking good,” FP Jones said as he looked at the poster for their band playing at the homecoming dance, which Fred had just pinned to the notice board.
“Just wish it wasn’t pinned up next to that,” Fred replied, gesturing towards another poster advertising the upcoming wrestling match against Southside High, featuring Hiram “The Ram” Lodge.
FP stepped over to the poster and ripped it down from the notice board, ripping it in half. “There,” he grinned. “Now it’s not. And any more of those I see, I’ll either rip them in half too, or put our posters all over them so no one has to look at his smirking face. But I doubt it’s gonna last with him and Hermione. Hiram Lodge has a different girl hanging off his arm every week. You should have heard Alice talking about him the other day. ‘I bet his wrestling career isn’t the only reason he calls himself The Ram’,” he said in an uncanny impression.
“Since when do you keep quoting Alice?” Fred asked.
“Since she’s right about this jackass,” FP began, but Fred wasn’t buying that.
“I’m not so sure it’s about Hiram. Even before Hermione and I broke up, you were talking about her a lot,” Fred went on. “Anything you wanna share with me?”
FP laughed a little too loud and a little too long. “Me and Alice? Yeah, whatever. Besides, she’s going to the dance with Stepford Cooper, and everyone knows it. As for me, the fact that we’re providing the music means that we wouldn’t have time for dates on the night even if we had them. Anyway, gonna go and do some more ripping up Hiram. Catch you later.”
As Fred watched FP go, he wasn’t so sure he entirely bought FP’s explanation.
As Alice listened to Penelope droning on about how important it was that as the nominees for homecoming queen, it was vital they all made a good impression, a part of her wanted to take that chocolate malted and dump it over her head.
It still didn’t quite feel real to Alice that she had ever been nominated for homecoming queen at all, and she suspected a large part of that was down to the fact that she was going as Hal Cooper’s date, rather than on her own merits. A year ago, she most likely wouldn’t have even been attending, wouldn’t have been seen dead there, preferring to be downing Snakebite at the Whyte Wyrm with her fellow Serpents. But that time was behind her now. She’d shed her skin, no matter what FP said, practiced getting her makeup and accessories just right, looked sufficiently polished that no one would ever mistake her for a Serpent ever again. And yet sometimes she’d catch the likes of Penelope Merriwether looking at her as though they saw right through her mask to the person she was before, and were waiting for the right moment to bring her crashing down.
She knew that a large part of her acceptance came from the fact that she was dating Hal Cooper. Since everyone knew who he was, they automatically knew who she was, and lots of people (with the exception of those sat beside her right now) thought that she and Hal were a shoo in for homecoming king and queen. Penelope, however, thought that the fact that she was dating Cliff Blossom automatically guaranteed her victory. Alice barely knew the guy, but she knew that Hal couldn’t stand him, so she too steered clear.
“So as the future homecoming queen and ladies in waiting, and may the best girl win,” Penelope giggled, and Alice clutched at her glass again to prevent herself from throwing the contents at Penelope, “I think it’s important that we present a united front. I was thinking that maybe we should look at colour coordinating, maybe this shade of Precious Pink?” She thrust a magazine under the others’ noses.
“With your hair colour, I think you’re out of your mind,” Hermione smirked, raising an eyebrow at Alice.
Penelope flushed, but quickly recovered her composure as she turned towards the door. “Oh, look who’s here. I do hope Hiram wasn’t too upset about his posters?”
“What do you mean, Penelope?” Hermione asked.
“I caught that awful FP Jones ripping one to shreds this morning, and putting up his own posters for his band up over Hiram’s wrestling match posters,” Penelope explained. “I really don’t know what Principal Martinez was thinking letting his band perform at the Homecoming dance. Their kind of music,” that last word in air quotes, “really doesn’t fit with the theme at all, and even their name is ridiculous. The Fred-Heads? Why not just call themselves Trying Too Hard To Be Deadheads and have done with it?” She gestured over her shoulder to where Fred and FP had just walked in. As they looked over and spotted Hermione, FP whispered something to Fred, who shook his head and took a seat in a booth with his back to them.
Alice hastily shoved back her chair, ignored Hermione’s shriek of “Hey!” as her milkshake nearly went flying all over her, and ran to the bathroom, locking herself in a stall and vomiting.
“Alice? You okay? I just had to get out of there. If it isn’t Penelope showing off because Blossom’s probably gonna buy her votes, it’s FP and Fred and their stupid pissing contest with Hiram, and I know he’s not gonna take it well about the posters…Alice?” Hermione had walked into the bathroom just as Alice finished bringing up her entire chocolate malted.
Alice glanced up at her. “Don’t think that agreed with me. I have a lactose intolerance.”
Hermione stared at her. “If you have a lactose intolerance, why did you drink that whole milkshake?”
“Because Penelope already bought them all for everyone when I got here and I didn’t feel I could say no,” Alice explained.
“Take some lessons from me, sweetie,” Hermione suggested. “You just heard me say no to her Precious Puke. Stick with me, I’ll show you how to stand up to her.”
Alice forced a smile, struggled to her feet. Hermione seemed to have bought it. She couldn’t tell her why she’d really vomited, at least not now anyway. There was someone else she needed to tell first.
“There, that’s the last of them,” Hiram greeted Hermione the next morning as he taped another poster for his wrestling match right on top of the Fred-Heads poster.
“Let’s not stoop to their level,” Hermione suggested, moving the poster slightly to the left so the band poster was visible again. “Focus on your match, and then on taking me to the dance, not on some pissing match with my ex and his best friend.”
“Are you defending Fred?” Hiram asked. “Penelope caught them red handed.”
“She caught FP red handed, Hiram,” Hermione pointed out. “She didn’t catch Fred doing anything. And I’m also pointing out that I’m at least partly responsible for this situation. If I hadn’t left Fred for you in the first place, FP wouldn’t have felt the need to retaliate against you. Look, I’ll talk to Fred, see if I can get him to call off his little attack dog.”
“And if he doesn’t?” Hiram asked.
“He will. I’m confident of that. Just remember he is the injured party here, Hiram. Don’t go seeking any kind of revenge on him. Concentrate on your match, and on us.”
Hiram nodded. “Okay. I promise you.” He pulled Hermione into a hug, satisfied that he had kept her quiet for now. But he smiled to himself as he thought that while he had promised her he would lay off her ex, he had no intention of doing anything of the kind…