I'll finish this later

[telepathicbotox]

I once had a dream
That I ate a chair
And all my teeth were replaced
By splinters,
My continence became more firm
But my purpose depended on others

Oh please, make a ladder of me
My voice is not for your languor
My eyes are steady and I would readily
Raise a flask to your health
At your banquet of clinking glasses
And hey, you could bring me to any bar
Should your company offend you, I will
Undoubtedly shatter over the head of that fiend