Dear Admiral
Thank God THAT'S finished! I find the whole happenings of that last port utterly ridiculous- ME? AN AMERICAN FOOTBALL HERO? Pfft! You've got a pretty crazy sense of humor, "Admiral"!
-I'd call you a fascist, which is exactly what you are, except that your decision to stop in that port helped make my our dream come true. By "our" dream, I'm of course talking about myself and my beloved soul mate, Claire. Or Elle. Whatever her name is. I probably should figure that out.
In case you and all the other squares here haven't heard, matey, we got married! Right on! This is exactly the way things should be: a young, wide-eyed, big bottomed anarchist like myself legally bound to a hot saucy blond number like her! Cor! The things we'll do together, forever! And don't even try telling me that the wedding didn't happen- I've got memories and a ring to prove it! And I bet we even have a wedding license too, except I'm not sure where it would be. Perhaps back at that port. But that doesn't change that it's a valid legal document!
Speaking of my marriage, if my new wife (blimey, that's going to take some getting used to, isn't it, sweetheart?) is reading this, please feel free to come by my room. Or should I call it "our room" since we're now a wedded couple? Whatever the case, I'll be here waiting. To get our honeymoon started, if you know what I mean.
(Boy, I'm a pretty raunchy fellow, aren't I? I bet that's one of the reasons you said "yes" to marrying me!)
[Private to Neil]
Yeah, that's right, Neil- I'm married! To the hottest tart on the ship! No joke! And we've definitely done it too many times to count! Try not to be jealous, it's not like you'll ever get any chick near as attractive as my bride! I just wish Mike and Vyvyan were here to see this! They'll both go absolutely crazy when they find out!
-I'd call you a fascist, which is exactly what you are, except that your decision to stop in that port helped make my our dream come true. By "our" dream, I'm of course talking about myself and my beloved soul mate, Claire. Or Elle. Whatever her name is. I probably should figure that out.
In case you and all the other squares here haven't heard, matey, we got married! Right on! This is exactly the way things should be: a young, wide-eyed, big bottomed anarchist like myself legally bound to a hot saucy blond number like her! Cor! The things we'll do together, forever! And don't even try telling me that the wedding didn't happen- I've got memories and a ring to prove it! And I bet we even have a wedding license too, except I'm not sure where it would be. Perhaps back at that port. But that doesn't change that it's a valid legal document!
Speaking of my marriage, if my new wife (blimey, that's going to take some getting used to, isn't it, sweetheart?) is reading this, please feel free to come by my room. Or should I call it "our room" since we're now a wedded couple? Whatever the case, I'll be here waiting. To get our honeymoon started, if you know what I mean.
(Boy, I'm a pretty raunchy fellow, aren't I? I bet that's one of the reasons you said "yes" to marrying me!)
[Private to Neil]
Yeah, that's right, Neil- I'm married! To the hottest tart on the ship! No joke! And we've definitely done it too many times to count! Try not to be jealous, it's not like you'll ever get any chick near as attractive as my bride! I just wish Mike and Vyvyan were here to see this! They'll both go absolutely crazy when they find out!