YOU KNOW WHAT THIS ICON MEANS
OH MY GOD.
OH MY GOD.
SO UM. OH MY GOD.
SO I JUST GOT BACK FROM THE BEST CONCERT IN THE UNIVERSE.
Basically I came to this little stage in Philly thinking that the concert would go like this: 3OH!3 would open up, and then the sun would go down, and Cobra Starship would be fabulous, and Travie was on the website so he'd do something too, and it'd be one big happy music fest.
Yeah, it was. Not like that at all.
It was better.
The opener was some band called I Fight Dragons, I don't think they're local since they mentioned that it was their first time in Philly. If I had to name their genre, I'd say something along the lines of "nerdcore." (EDIT: I just found out that nerdcore is already a word, and it refers to HIP-HOP. I DON'T EVEN, ENGLISH. Wiki calls I Fight Dragons "chiptune/NES-rock" which makes a lot more sense) They start walking out and it's the usual guitar/bass/drum combination, and then this chick comes out just. Wearing this weird-looking glove. So I'm like "all right, sure, this must be some kind of sweet experimental electronic thing. I can get behind that."
And then I realize it's a POWERGLOVE. LIKE. THE NINTENDO PRODUCT.
ALSO THEN SHE PICKED UP AN NES CONTROLLER ATTACHED TO HER MIC STAND. AND STARTED PUSHING BUTTONS. AND IT WAS LIKE A TINY KEYBOARD.
THE ONE GUITARIST HAD AN SNES CONTROLLER.
THE OTHER ONE HAD A ROCK BAND GUITAR.
AND FOR ONE OF THE SONG INTROS THE DRUMMER GOT UP FROM HIS KIT AND STARTED STOMPING ON A DDR MAT.
THERE WERE TWO TV SCREENS ON STAGE. PLAYING FOOTAGE FROM OLD SCHOOL NINTENDO GAMES.
OH MY GOD.
So that was pretty fantastic. Then they eventually left and there was a techie breaking-down-building-up interlude, including a giant poster saying TRAVIE MCCOY in that font I really need getting put up on the back of the stage. More on techs later, because once the turntable was all set up, OUT CAME TRAVIE.
TRAVIIIIIE OH MY GOD. I JUST. The music itself wasn't all that fantastic (I do like Billionaire a bit though, I'll admit) but oh my god Travie. He is just one big beanie-hatted ball of stage presence and AMAZING FACES. You could tell he was looking someone in the eye because his eyes would get all gigantic and he'd have this big shocked-looking mouth. Seriously why do people talk about Gabe's eyes when there are TRAVIES in the world. Also Rylands. But I'll discuss the differing creeper factors of Cobras at a later time, because after Travie was AAAAAAA COBRAS.
So on stage there were a few things that were under black cloths the whole time. I didn't really think much of them except for the one weird-looking maybe-piano thing in the corner, but that's for later. The important thing is that once they took off one black cloth to reveal the CS drums, everything got a little crazier from there. Ellen and I were about midway back from the stage, but when it seemed like Cobra was about to pop onto the scene we just had to get to the pit. You can't make eye contact with anyone outside of there, it's terrible.
But yeah. Here we are standing around, surrounded by scene kids, and suddenly OH SHIT IT'S A GABE SAPORTA TWENTY FEET AWAY FROM MY FACE. AAAAAAAAA. He was wearing an Olympic jacket and talked about Uruguay tying France in the World Cup today. Then he went on about how he doesn't have any athletic ability, but one thing he can do? Is gyrate his hips a lot. And he demonstrated. Gabe <3
They opened with The City Is At War, which was great because I actually know all the words and screaming a lot is a great way to start a performance. Then I thiiiink they did Pete Wentz Is The Only Reason We're Famous, which also had lots of screaming but I was just proud of myself for knowing the title since I barely listen to that song. Gabe sounded pretty hoarse, like I've been hearing he's been, especially between songs when he started just chattering about whatever. During the songs themselves he looked like he was trying to avoid singing as much as possible, with lots of mikes pointing to the audience. You can do that when your audience is dedicated, I guess. And when a lot of your songs have call-and-response.
Aaaand I don't remember the rest of the order, but oh my god, the things he'd babble about in between. His fans don't help. A few kids were holding up signs that read out "FIVE DOLLAR FOOT LONG" and he's just like "...Well, do they have a vegetarian footlong?" CUE CHEERING.
Another time he started talking about the river behind the stage, and couldn't remember if it was the Delaware or not. Then Ryland was like "Dude, it's the Mississippi, duh :|" and Suarez was all "I don't know what you guys are talking about, it's either the Tigris or the Euphrates." I JUST. I DON'T EVEN, GUYS.
Eventually they got around to MOTHERFUCKING BRING IT, and spent like fifteen minutes playing the opening riff while Gabe babbled like he always does. He gave shoutouts to Bill Beckett and Samuel L. Jackson! He also went on forever about the story behind the song, and this conversation with Mr. Jackson that may or may not be fictional. idk I can't remember, I hope it'll be on Youtube soon.
And then they finally got around to playing, and it was FANTASTIC AND THERE WERE FANGS EVERYWHERE. I got all excited when I heard Travie would be there so he could do the rap, but Gabe said that Travie respected the Cobra tradition of bringing up members of the audience to do it. Eh. It was just these two teenage girls who looked exactly the same and I think one of them forgot the words. ngl, I started reciting the whole thing to myself yesterday to make sure I knew them, just in case I got picked
Right after the song he had everyone put their fangs up, and then said that every single one of us was now a COBRA FOR LIFE. STRAIGHT OUT OF THE COBRA'S MOUTH, GUYS. I'M A COBRA TOO. /flails
Then (or maybe not afterward, but at some point), Smile For the Paparazzi! Which I really wish I was in the center for, because this giant mystery black thing was in the way of seeing Gabe when he went back to go play bongos or something. But I got to shout some more, so. Not complaining.
Their ridiculous intros were the best, oh my god. At some point out of nowhere they started playing THE GODDAMN FRESH PRINCE THEME. And then Ryland interrupted after he moved with his auntie and uncle in Bel Air, and they had a long discussion about why the guys were up to no good, which segued into. Uh. How can I not even remember. I don't think it was Good Girls Go Bad, because that was last. Whatever, I'll edit this later once there are other con reports I can reference. THE POINT IS IT WAS AMAZING. (EDIT: ACCORDING TO ELLEN IT ACTUALLY WAS GOOD GIRLS GO BAD. PROBABLY.)
And oh my god Guilty Pleasure. I. Before they even started Gabe started going on about how they were finally on the radio, and he was all "What the hell we have like three albums out already, why are we only on the radio now" and then gave a shoutout to everyone who'd been with them before they were on the radio, before they were on TV, because "WHY ARE WE HERE TONIGHT?" he asked, and everyone gave answers mostly approximating to "BECAUSE YOU'RE AWESOME" and I shouted "TO MAKE US DANCE!" and then Guilty Pleasure happened. sldfkj
AND HE CHANGED THE WORDS. "I came here to kick some ass tonight" I think is pretty standard, but at the beginning "So you got some brand new clothes/you never could afford before" was changed to "So we've got a brand new song/they're playin' on the radio." And I just. My heart. These guys.
Gabe and Vicky-T did the Guilty Pleasure waltz, but I couldn't see it over the MYSTERY BLACK THING. Hmph. I could see their heads though, they looked adorable. Gabe spent a lot of time at Vicky-T's mike making eyes at her, really. I WOULD TOO.
ELLEN AND I AND A FEW CHICKS STANDING NEAR US SEEMED TO BE THE ONLY ONES DOING THE DANCE. But it was okay, because halfway through GABE STARTED DOING IT. AND WE FELT AFFIRMED.
If I remember correctly they ended with Good Girls Go Bad. Makes sense to me. I don't actually remember anything about that part, I think I was too busy falling all over myself with glee. SUAREZ WAS RIGHT IN FRONT OF US THE WHOLE TIME, LOOKING TOTALLY HOT IN HIS PLAID BLUE SHIRT. IT WAS FUCKING DISTRACTING.
Also at some point someone threw a bra at Gabe. And he was just like ":D" and tossed it behind himself for later. Or something. I never did find out what happened to it.
OH OH ALSO ALSO. After one song or another a bunch of balloons popped out of nowhere and landed all over the audience, right. And then Gabe was like "GUYS BE CAREFUL WITH THOSE you can't let them get in the river. It's bad for the fishies." And then he initiated a group popping. And he made fun of one kid because he failed at it and told him to use his teeth instead. Gabe you are the most darling asshole.
So yeah. I wish I could've caught one of the MILLIONS OF THINGS THEY TOSSED OFF STAGE, seriously I think Suarez had a pile of guitar picks or something. Oh well, they ran off to go DJ at a party I TOTALLY WOULD'VE GONE TO IF I WEREN'T UNDERAGE. AND ALSO LIVING AN HOUR FROM PHILLY.
And then there was a long period of techies doing tech things. Like being hilarious and oh my god why isn't there a techie fandom? The one who kept doing mike checks was great enough because he'd use his time with the mike to tell us to make some noise. And whenever a drum checker came on he'd either play along with the interlude radio pop that was playing during breakdowns or just jam and be awesome and get his own techie cheers. Also one of them was totally bangable and wearing this very classy vest-shirt thing (the 3OH!3 frontman later introduced him as Peter, their tour manager, and despaired that their tour manager was better-looking than anyone else in their band).
At one point one of the techs (I think later I found out he was the stage manager, but he did sound checks) went over to another and just gave him a big hug for some reason or another. The crowd went crazy as he started walking away. Clearly, these guys have been around Cobra and company far too long, because he grinned, stepped back, gave another hug, and then a big stupid cheek kiss. HE GOT PUNCHED IN THE SHOULDER FOR IT BY THE OTHER GUY. THE CROWD WAS GOING NUTS. I LOVE YOU TECHS.
So after a while they finally raised up the giant 3OH!3 poster (an American flag-colored thing with line after line of 3OH!3OH!3OH!3 instead of stripes and their wacky hand sign instead of stars). I actually really adore their clever little sign. Second best next to fangs, I think.
Oh, if anyone doesn't know who they are, they did that song about not trusting hoes. That's about all I knew going into this concert, except that they did that other song that's apparently spelled STARSTRUKK according to Google. They're all right. It's more something you'd hear at a dance or a club and sing along to than actually go out and buy.
But seeing them live? Oh my god.
That mystery black thing that kept blocking my view earlier? Yeah, we still weren't sure what it was, only that it had paws. White, furry paws. It did not make sense, mystery hidden pianos don't have paws! But to open up the show they unveiled the ROBOT WOLF underneath it. Like a regular wolf, only its head moved back and forth and IT SHOT LASER LIGHTS OUT OF ITS EYES. AAAAAAAA.
It seemed like there's two frontmen, or at least two vocalists who are almost at the same status. I don't know their names and I'm too lazy to look them up because it's 3 AM and I want to finish this post, but there was a tiny one and a tall, skinny one.
The tiny one seemed like the real real frontman, he said the most and sung the most, and also he is THE MOST ENERGETIC LITTLE CREATURE ON THE PLANET. All you see when he's performing is him JUMPING AROUND AND FLAILING HIS LITTLE LIMBS AND OH MY GOD I WANT ONE. It wasn't even like, screamy punky flailing, it was just him jumping like an idiot and having the time of his goddamn life. At one point he was like "I TOOK TEN YEARS OF DANCE SCHOOL AND LOOK WHERE IT GOT ME." and he did this slightly graceful little move and then somersaulted badly. He is so darling.
The other one was fantastic too, just all long limbs and zero body fat and it looked like he'd have great hair if maybe he washed it. Also he could not stop lifting up his shirt, oh my god. HI, I AM WEAK TO SKINNY GUYS, APPARENTLY.
About three songs in the tiny one started talking about the audience, and how his favorites were the ones right down the center (he pointed, leading to a line of cheers and hands up) and to the left (our side!). More cheering!
But then the skinny one was all "You've got it all wrong, the best are on the right side" and cued another round of cheering. This went on for a while, just "LET ME HEAR THE RIGHT SIDE," "LET ME HEAR THE LEFT SIDE," and then it became hilarious because the tiny one was like "...I wonder if they can even understand me. /RANDOM GIBBERISH WHILE POINTING" and the left side still cheered, and the two guys just kept spouting gibberish to call for cheers, and I was dying.
During some song I didn't know (which was all of them except the first and last, I kind of picked up the choruses as the others went along?) someone who may or may not have been the keyboardist suddenly appeared out of nowhere IN A HORSE MASK. AND JUST. STARTED DOING THIS FLAILDANCE. I DON'T THINK IT WAS PLANNED, THE VOCALISTS WERE LAUGHING THEIR ASSES OFF and the tiny one started telling us to dance for the horse man. I don't. What are these guys and where is their fandom.
A song or two before the end the tiny one introduced their crew, since apparently this was going to be their last time together (Ryan Ross is probably out stealing techs again). It was sort of adorable. And then they did they sang about why not to trust hoes and there was lots of jumping.
And. That's about all I can remember. If I remember any more I'll add it, this is more for my memory's benefit than anything else.
Also I got a Cobra hoodie. Something from the merch that wasn't totally tacky, too! /proud
And now I think I'll go to bed.
...
...I'M A COBRA FOR LIFE, GUYS.
/flails forever
EDIT: THINGS I FORGOT TO MENTION AND ALSO A SPECIAL MINISPAM
-Ivy League! Suarez wandered all the way to the other end of the stage to sing the last few high notes of a song with Ryland. D'awwww.
-If Ellen is to be believed, Suarez totally winked at her. Aaaaaa. I think Gabe may or may not have looked at me a few times, but that might be a stage eyes thing. Oh well.
-TRAVIE GAVE EVERYONE HEART HANDS AT THE END. IT WAS ADORABLE.
-Oh another Travie note, he totally tried to take off his tie all suave but IT GOT STUCK. SO HE WAS GOING AROUND WITH A TIE STUCK AROUND HIS HEAD FOR ABOUT A MINUTE. <3
-I Fight Dragons!
Not sure if the Powerglove chick only wears her glove recently or only at certain concerts or what. I can't find any videos of her with it.
I STILL LOVE HER. THEY ALL LOOK LIKE THEY'RE HAVING SO MUCH FUN, ALL THE TIME.
-3OH!3, I just found out, only has two members, being the two frontmen I babbled about earlier. That explains why none of the other players were doing much besides playing. So here, have a tiny picspam!
Apparently their names are, from left to right, Nathaniel and Sean.
This is Sean.
He is adorable.
This is Nathaniel. Or maybe Nate, idk where is the fandom to help me out here.
Jesus Christ legs.
AND. THAT'S ALL I GOT. Also a set list I found has Pete Wentz Is The Only Reason We're Famous listed as Smash It Up. Well, that's easier to put in writing, I guess.
DOUBLE EDIT: Videos the kind people over at Youtube put up, because they are ridiculously fast!
Light show that I missed because I was on the far right!
Travie! Hat! Adorable!
RIVERS. I DON'T EVEN.
Guilty Pleasure! Dancing! Waltzing! Lyrics! I think Nate cut his hair!
Absolutely awful sound quality but it's not like you could hear Gabe all that well at the actual concert anyway. Mostly I just love HIS DANCING.
Also if you notice at one point this is the part where RYLAND STARTS PLAYING HIS GUITAR BACKWARDS. I. AAAAAAAGH THESE GUYS.
All right done for reals now.
I LIED, ONE MORE EDIT:
This isn't from last night's show, but there's only one video of them from last night, so have one from Florida that's actually pretty fabulous quality.
WORDS CANNOT EXPRESS HOW MUCH I LOVE THE DRUMMER ON THE DDR PAD.
OH MY GOD.
SO UM. OH MY GOD.
SO I JUST GOT BACK FROM THE BEST CONCERT IN THE UNIVERSE.
Basically I came to this little stage in Philly thinking that the concert would go like this: 3OH!3 would open up, and then the sun would go down, and Cobra Starship would be fabulous, and Travie was on the website so he'd do something too, and it'd be one big happy music fest.
Yeah, it was. Not like that at all.
It was better.
The opener was some band called I Fight Dragons, I don't think they're local since they mentioned that it was their first time in Philly. If I had to name their genre, I'd say something along the lines of "nerdcore." (EDIT: I just found out that nerdcore is already a word, and it refers to HIP-HOP. I DON'T EVEN, ENGLISH. Wiki calls I Fight Dragons "chiptune/NES-rock" which makes a lot more sense) They start walking out and it's the usual guitar/bass/drum combination, and then this chick comes out just. Wearing this weird-looking glove. So I'm like "all right, sure, this must be some kind of sweet experimental electronic thing. I can get behind that."
And then I realize it's a POWERGLOVE. LIKE. THE NINTENDO PRODUCT.
ALSO THEN SHE PICKED UP AN NES CONTROLLER ATTACHED TO HER MIC STAND. AND STARTED PUSHING BUTTONS. AND IT WAS LIKE A TINY KEYBOARD.
THE ONE GUITARIST HAD AN SNES CONTROLLER.
THE OTHER ONE HAD A ROCK BAND GUITAR.
AND FOR ONE OF THE SONG INTROS THE DRUMMER GOT UP FROM HIS KIT AND STARTED STOMPING ON A DDR MAT.
THERE WERE TWO TV SCREENS ON STAGE. PLAYING FOOTAGE FROM OLD SCHOOL NINTENDO GAMES.
OH MY GOD.
So that was pretty fantastic. Then they eventually left and there was a techie breaking-down-building-up interlude, including a giant poster saying TRAVIE MCCOY in that font I really need getting put up on the back of the stage. More on techs later, because once the turntable was all set up, OUT CAME TRAVIE.
TRAVIIIIIE OH MY GOD. I JUST. The music itself wasn't all that fantastic (I do like Billionaire a bit though, I'll admit) but oh my god Travie. He is just one big beanie-hatted ball of stage presence and AMAZING FACES. You could tell he was looking someone in the eye because his eyes would get all gigantic and he'd have this big shocked-looking mouth. Seriously why do people talk about Gabe's eyes when there are TRAVIES in the world. Also Rylands. But I'll discuss the differing creeper factors of Cobras at a later time, because after Travie was AAAAAAA COBRAS.
So on stage there were a few things that were under black cloths the whole time. I didn't really think much of them except for the one weird-looking maybe-piano thing in the corner, but that's for later. The important thing is that once they took off one black cloth to reveal the CS drums, everything got a little crazier from there. Ellen and I were about midway back from the stage, but when it seemed like Cobra was about to pop onto the scene we just had to get to the pit. You can't make eye contact with anyone outside of there, it's terrible.
But yeah. Here we are standing around, surrounded by scene kids, and suddenly OH SHIT IT'S A GABE SAPORTA TWENTY FEET AWAY FROM MY FACE. AAAAAAAAA. He was wearing an Olympic jacket and talked about Uruguay tying France in the World Cup today. Then he went on about how he doesn't have any athletic ability, but one thing he can do? Is gyrate his hips a lot. And he demonstrated. Gabe <3
They opened with The City Is At War, which was great because I actually know all the words and screaming a lot is a great way to start a performance. Then I thiiiink they did Pete Wentz Is The Only Reason We're Famous, which also had lots of screaming but I was just proud of myself for knowing the title since I barely listen to that song. Gabe sounded pretty hoarse, like I've been hearing he's been, especially between songs when he started just chattering about whatever. During the songs themselves he looked like he was trying to avoid singing as much as possible, with lots of mikes pointing to the audience. You can do that when your audience is dedicated, I guess. And when a lot of your songs have call-and-response.
Aaaand I don't remember the rest of the order, but oh my god, the things he'd babble about in between. His fans don't help. A few kids were holding up signs that read out "FIVE DOLLAR FOOT LONG" and he's just like "...Well, do they have a vegetarian footlong?" CUE CHEERING.
Another time he started talking about the river behind the stage, and couldn't remember if it was the Delaware or not. Then Ryland was like "Dude, it's the Mississippi, duh :|" and Suarez was all "I don't know what you guys are talking about, it's either the Tigris or the Euphrates." I JUST. I DON'T EVEN, GUYS.
Eventually they got around to MOTHERFUCKING BRING IT, and spent like fifteen minutes playing the opening riff while Gabe babbled like he always does. He gave shoutouts to Bill Beckett and Samuel L. Jackson! He also went on forever about the story behind the song, and this conversation with Mr. Jackson that may or may not be fictional. idk I can't remember, I hope it'll be on Youtube soon.
And then they finally got around to playing, and it was FANTASTIC AND THERE WERE FANGS EVERYWHERE. I got all excited when I heard Travie would be there so he could do the rap, but Gabe said that Travie respected the Cobra tradition of bringing up members of the audience to do it. Eh. It was just these two teenage girls who looked exactly the same and I think one of them forgot the words. ngl, I started reciting the whole thing to myself yesterday to make sure I knew them, just in case I got picked
Right after the song he had everyone put their fangs up, and then said that every single one of us was now a COBRA FOR LIFE. STRAIGHT OUT OF THE COBRA'S MOUTH, GUYS. I'M A COBRA TOO. /flails
Then (or maybe not afterward, but at some point), Smile For the Paparazzi! Which I really wish I was in the center for, because this giant mystery black thing was in the way of seeing Gabe when he went back to go play bongos or something. But I got to shout some more, so. Not complaining.
Their ridiculous intros were the best, oh my god. At some point out of nowhere they started playing THE GODDAMN FRESH PRINCE THEME. And then Ryland interrupted after he moved with his auntie and uncle in Bel Air, and they had a long discussion about why the guys were up to no good, which segued into. Uh. How can I not even remember. I don't think it was Good Girls Go Bad, because that was last. Whatever, I'll edit this later once there are other con reports I can reference. THE POINT IS IT WAS AMAZING. (EDIT: ACCORDING TO ELLEN IT ACTUALLY WAS GOOD GIRLS GO BAD. PROBABLY.)
And oh my god Guilty Pleasure. I. Before they even started Gabe started going on about how they were finally on the radio, and he was all "What the hell we have like three albums out already, why are we only on the radio now" and then gave a shoutout to everyone who'd been with them before they were on the radio, before they were on TV, because "WHY ARE WE HERE TONIGHT?" he asked, and everyone gave answers mostly approximating to "BECAUSE YOU'RE AWESOME" and I shouted "TO MAKE US DANCE!" and then Guilty Pleasure happened. sldfkj
AND HE CHANGED THE WORDS. "I came here to kick some ass tonight" I think is pretty standard, but at the beginning "So you got some brand new clothes/you never could afford before" was changed to "So we've got a brand new song/they're playin' on the radio." And I just. My heart. These guys.
Gabe and Vicky-T did the Guilty Pleasure waltz, but I couldn't see it over the MYSTERY BLACK THING. Hmph. I could see their heads though, they looked adorable. Gabe spent a lot of time at Vicky-T's mike making eyes at her, really. I WOULD TOO.
ELLEN AND I AND A FEW CHICKS STANDING NEAR US SEEMED TO BE THE ONLY ONES DOING THE DANCE. But it was okay, because halfway through GABE STARTED DOING IT. AND WE FELT AFFIRMED.
If I remember correctly they ended with Good Girls Go Bad. Makes sense to me. I don't actually remember anything about that part, I think I was too busy falling all over myself with glee. SUAREZ WAS RIGHT IN FRONT OF US THE WHOLE TIME, LOOKING TOTALLY HOT IN HIS PLAID BLUE SHIRT. IT WAS FUCKING DISTRACTING.
Also at some point someone threw a bra at Gabe. And he was just like ":D" and tossed it behind himself for later. Or something. I never did find out what happened to it.
OH OH ALSO ALSO. After one song or another a bunch of balloons popped out of nowhere and landed all over the audience, right. And then Gabe was like "GUYS BE CAREFUL WITH THOSE you can't let them get in the river. It's bad for the fishies." And then he initiated a group popping. And he made fun of one kid because he failed at it and told him to use his teeth instead. Gabe you are the most darling asshole.
So yeah. I wish I could've caught one of the MILLIONS OF THINGS THEY TOSSED OFF STAGE, seriously I think Suarez had a pile of guitar picks or something. Oh well, they ran off to go DJ at a party I TOTALLY WOULD'VE GONE TO IF I WEREN'T UNDERAGE. AND ALSO LIVING AN HOUR FROM PHILLY.
And then there was a long period of techies doing tech things. Like being hilarious and oh my god why isn't there a techie fandom? The one who kept doing mike checks was great enough because he'd use his time with the mike to tell us to make some noise. And whenever a drum checker came on he'd either play along with the interlude radio pop that was playing during breakdowns or just jam and be awesome and get his own techie cheers. Also one of them was totally bangable and wearing this very classy vest-shirt thing (the 3OH!3 frontman later introduced him as Peter, their tour manager, and despaired that their tour manager was better-looking than anyone else in their band).
At one point one of the techs (I think later I found out he was the stage manager, but he did sound checks) went over to another and just gave him a big hug for some reason or another. The crowd went crazy as he started walking away. Clearly, these guys have been around Cobra and company far too long, because he grinned, stepped back, gave another hug, and then a big stupid cheek kiss. HE GOT PUNCHED IN THE SHOULDER FOR IT BY THE OTHER GUY. THE CROWD WAS GOING NUTS. I LOVE YOU TECHS.
So after a while they finally raised up the giant 3OH!3 poster (an American flag-colored thing with line after line of 3OH!3OH!3OH!3 instead of stripes and their wacky hand sign instead of stars). I actually really adore their clever little sign. Second best next to fangs, I think.
Oh, if anyone doesn't know who they are, they did that song about not trusting hoes. That's about all I knew going into this concert, except that they did that other song that's apparently spelled STARSTRUKK according to Google. They're all right. It's more something you'd hear at a dance or a club and sing along to than actually go out and buy.
But seeing them live? Oh my god.
That mystery black thing that kept blocking my view earlier? Yeah, we still weren't sure what it was, only that it had paws. White, furry paws. It did not make sense, mystery hidden pianos don't have paws! But to open up the show they unveiled the ROBOT WOLF underneath it. Like a regular wolf, only its head moved back and forth and IT SHOT LASER LIGHTS OUT OF ITS EYES. AAAAAAAA.
It seemed like there's two frontmen, or at least two vocalists who are almost at the same status. I don't know their names and I'm too lazy to look them up because it's 3 AM and I want to finish this post, but there was a tiny one and a tall, skinny one.
The tiny one seemed like the real real frontman, he said the most and sung the most, and also he is THE MOST ENERGETIC LITTLE CREATURE ON THE PLANET. All you see when he's performing is him JUMPING AROUND AND FLAILING HIS LITTLE LIMBS AND OH MY GOD I WANT ONE. It wasn't even like, screamy punky flailing, it was just him jumping like an idiot and having the time of his goddamn life. At one point he was like "I TOOK TEN YEARS OF DANCE SCHOOL AND LOOK WHERE IT GOT ME." and he did this slightly graceful little move and then somersaulted badly. He is so darling.
The other one was fantastic too, just all long limbs and zero body fat and it looked like he'd have great hair if maybe he washed it. Also he could not stop lifting up his shirt, oh my god. HI, I AM WEAK TO SKINNY GUYS, APPARENTLY.
About three songs in the tiny one started talking about the audience, and how his favorites were the ones right down the center (he pointed, leading to a line of cheers and hands up) and to the left (our side!). More cheering!
But then the skinny one was all "You've got it all wrong, the best are on the right side" and cued another round of cheering. This went on for a while, just "LET ME HEAR THE RIGHT SIDE," "LET ME HEAR THE LEFT SIDE," and then it became hilarious because the tiny one was like "...I wonder if they can even understand me. /RANDOM GIBBERISH WHILE POINTING" and the left side still cheered, and the two guys just kept spouting gibberish to call for cheers, and I was dying.
During some song I didn't know (which was all of them except the first and last, I kind of picked up the choruses as the others went along?) someone who may or may not have been the keyboardist suddenly appeared out of nowhere IN A HORSE MASK. AND JUST. STARTED DOING THIS FLAILDANCE. I DON'T THINK IT WAS PLANNED, THE VOCALISTS WERE LAUGHING THEIR ASSES OFF and the tiny one started telling us to dance for the horse man. I don't. What are these guys and where is their fandom.
A song or two before the end the tiny one introduced their crew, since apparently this was going to be their last time together (Ryan Ross is probably out stealing techs again). It was sort of adorable. And then they did they sang about why not to trust hoes and there was lots of jumping.
And. That's about all I can remember. If I remember any more I'll add it, this is more for my memory's benefit than anything else.
Also I got a Cobra hoodie. Something from the merch that wasn't totally tacky, too! /proud
And now I think I'll go to bed.
...
...I'M A COBRA FOR LIFE, GUYS.
/flails forever
EDIT: THINGS I FORGOT TO MENTION AND ALSO A SPECIAL MINISPAM
-Ivy League! Suarez wandered all the way to the other end of the stage to sing the last few high notes of a song with Ryland. D'awwww.
-If Ellen is to be believed, Suarez totally winked at her. Aaaaaa. I think Gabe may or may not have looked at me a few times, but that might be a stage eyes thing. Oh well.
-TRAVIE GAVE EVERYONE HEART HANDS AT THE END. IT WAS ADORABLE.
-Oh another Travie note, he totally tried to take off his tie all suave but IT GOT STUCK. SO HE WAS GOING AROUND WITH A TIE STUCK AROUND HIS HEAD FOR ABOUT A MINUTE. <3
-I Fight Dragons!
Click to view
Not sure if the Powerglove chick only wears her glove recently or only at certain concerts or what. I can't find any videos of her with it.
I STILL LOVE HER. THEY ALL LOOK LIKE THEY'RE HAVING SO MUCH FUN, ALL THE TIME.
-3OH!3, I just found out, only has two members, being the two frontmen I babbled about earlier. That explains why none of the other players were doing much besides playing. So here, have a tiny picspam!
Apparently their names are, from left to right, Nathaniel and Sean.
This is Sean.
He is adorable.
This is Nathaniel. Or maybe Nate, idk where is the fandom to help me out here.
Jesus Christ legs.
AND. THAT'S ALL I GOT. Also a set list I found has Pete Wentz Is The Only Reason We're Famous listed as Smash It Up. Well, that's easier to put in writing, I guess.
DOUBLE EDIT: Videos the kind people over at Youtube put up, because they are ridiculously fast!
Light show that I missed because I was on the far right!
Travie! Hat! Adorable!
RIVERS. I DON'T EVEN.
Guilty Pleasure! Dancing! Waltzing! Lyrics! I think Nate cut his hair!
Absolutely awful sound quality but it's not like you could hear Gabe all that well at the actual concert anyway. Mostly I just love HIS DANCING.
Also if you notice at one point this is the part where RYLAND STARTS PLAYING HIS GUITAR BACKWARDS. I. AAAAAAAGH THESE GUYS.
All right done for reals now.
I LIED, ONE MORE EDIT:
This isn't from last night's show, but there's only one video of them from last night, so have one from Florida that's actually pretty fabulous quality.
WORDS CANNOT EXPRESS HOW MUCH I LOVE THE DRUMMER ON THE DDR PAD.