Camp Revisited
Well, I was certainly right with what I wrote in my previous entry. He did give up, Joe and I's seperation was not permanent and I am content. Not wrecklessly happy, but content. Maybe this contentness is what makes it REAL. Maye I have spent so much time and energy searching for anything that could be better that I have always missed out on what I have had. I know that that is at least partially true. Frankly, I blame my mother. She enstilled in me these expectations that can not really ever be reached. Nothing is ever perfect. I do, however, think that I am beginning to grow up. I have no real desire to continue looking for what's new and exciting. It seems to rip my heart out and leave me for dead...no no no. I now am interested in self betterment. I don't think that's a real word, but oh well. I think I will end up a lot happier if I maintain the things I do have instead of taking heinous chances on things that never really want me in the first place.
I don't know. All I know is that eventually I will get bored. It is inevitable. That is who I am...I wish that there was a way to be perpetually entertained while in a stable relationship. I just don't see how it's possible. Maybe I should just be entertained more by everyday living rather than extravagances and exciting circumstances.
I just want to do EVERYTHING. I want to go EVERYWHERE. I want to meet EVERYONE. I think I just want too much.
;)
I don't know. All I know is that eventually I will get bored. It is inevitable. That is who I am...I wish that there was a way to be perpetually entertained while in a stable relationship. I just don't see how it's possible. Maybe I should just be entertained more by everyday living rather than extravagances and exciting circumstances.
I just want to do EVERYTHING. I want to go EVERYWHERE. I want to meet EVERYONE. I think I just want too much.
;)