So.....
I just found out one of my old lovers (an older one a sweet one probably the most messed up version of a relationship) he had a heart attack a month ago. He's doing better but I am once again confronted with the pains of all that that relationship is and was.... We never really broke it off just stopped seeing each other because of principles that were good to have....
I haven't always been good at articulating and today is no exception. That someone I would have changed my world for could have been gone and I wouldnt have known especially when we still flirt and part of me still loves him.... This hurts badly.
Anyway