Moving on.
Hm. I feel pathetic today. It's my third entry.
I didn't want to get up.
But I do have a reason. It's basically the last of my do-whatever-and-get-up-whenever-summer-days.
I start OTC on monday (a week before school starts, might I add.)Tomorrow is my school shopping day with Mom.
Oh, sure. I should probably be out enjoying the last bit of summer vacation. But I just wanted to sleep in for the last time.
I slept till twelve. Noon.
I also dont feel good.
Im in my glasses....and pajamas. I'm unshowered and probably hideous.
but whatever.
About the THING...
The move. People were looking at the house yesterday. Dunno if it's gonna happen yet...
It's a bittersweet ending to a friendship that I never thought would end.
I miss it sometimes.....but I realize that we've both grown up and are totally different. We have completely different views about life and politics....
It was a childish friendship. I have to tell myself that. Those 8 1/2 years seem like they were a dream. As if they never happened. But then I see the pictures...and I remember.
Why is it so hard for me to let this go? We've hardly spoken two words in a year and a half.
I'll just tell myself that:
It's over.
A hard thing is that when the new neigbors move in, they'll never know about how I used to spend my every summer in their house. Or how we imagined their backyard a different world, where we had adventures. They'll never think that the stain on the upstairs carpet was once caused by a sick little neigbor girl. (it they have the same carpet)
It's the memories that seem to kill me, but it's also them that keep me alive.
Knowing the troubles that we've been through will somehow make us stronger.
The consequences of our mistakes, hopefully, can show us not to make the same ones again.
I'm going to go take a shower and finally venture out into the outside world.
Have a nice day.
I didn't want to get up.
But I do have a reason. It's basically the last of my do-whatever-and-get-up-whenever-summer-days.
I start OTC on monday (a week before school starts, might I add.)Tomorrow is my school shopping day with Mom.
Oh, sure. I should probably be out enjoying the last bit of summer vacation. But I just wanted to sleep in for the last time.
I slept till twelve. Noon.
I also dont feel good.
Im in my glasses....and pajamas. I'm unshowered and probably hideous.
but whatever.
About the THING...
The move. People were looking at the house yesterday. Dunno if it's gonna happen yet...
It's a bittersweet ending to a friendship that I never thought would end.
I miss it sometimes.....but I realize that we've both grown up and are totally different. We have completely different views about life and politics....
It was a childish friendship. I have to tell myself that. Those 8 1/2 years seem like they were a dream. As if they never happened. But then I see the pictures...and I remember.
Why is it so hard for me to let this go? We've hardly spoken two words in a year and a half.
I'll just tell myself that:
It's over.
A hard thing is that when the new neigbors move in, they'll never know about how I used to spend my every summer in their house. Or how we imagined their backyard a different world, where we had adventures. They'll never think that the stain on the upstairs carpet was once caused by a sick little neigbor girl. (it they have the same carpet)
It's the memories that seem to kill me, but it's also them that keep me alive.
Knowing the troubles that we've been through will somehow make us stronger.
The consequences of our mistakes, hopefully, can show us not to make the same ones again.
I'm going to go take a shower and finally venture out into the outside world.
Have a nice day.