Long time no type...
Wow... it has definitely been a while. I'm actually not in the mood to type I don't think but now that I'm actually typing I'm not in the mood to stop. hmmm... life has definitely been interesting.... much drama and I don't even wish to discuss that because I don't even want to deal with it or be enveloped in all of the rudeness and cruelty and well... DRAMA!!! Either way.. lately I've just been talking... to people in general and seeing how things are playing out and deciding things, accepting things, understanding things. I'm finding it harder to trust people more and more each day and it's very irritating. I already had the conflict with wanting to trust no one but not being able to stop myself from wanting to trust them and knowing it was wrong but trusting them anyways and now when I want more than ever to trust people they are at their least trustworthy state. I just got back from California with Kim and things have definitely been a little tense as things always are but things are definitely changing and have changed and I'm working on dealing with them. I've got this problem where I don't like change usually... sometimes even if it's a good thing. A friend of mine has always been one to bitch about her boobs getting bigger... once in a while I join in with her... people our age and size are usually taking the opposite stand point and it's honestly very amusing. I've been talking to Cody a bit more lately... I called him the other night and we talked about underwear and life while Kim and him yelled back and forth at eachother in my ear about rivalries between the schools in Anderson and Cottonwood... It is strange how they insist on fighting with eachother and yelling in my ear when I'm holding the phone. Right now he's kind of confusing me about those kind of things though. His girlfriend lives in California and he's talking about moving back there in June and going to school at Shasta to get whatever he needs to be a fire fighter but then he bitches about Cottonwood and Anderson and well just things in general down there. I don't know. Derrick's being evasive and it's pretty darned irritating... maybe he's not being evasive I am probably just all tense about this deal with Sarah telling me he lied to me and the fact that she has been talking about going over there with Laura and crazy ass shtuff... I dunno. Life's being weird to me right now. My body wants to kill me and my birth control pills are being shipped over night from California because I left them there and virtually all of my laundry is dirty... I'm studying my driver's manual however little I think I need to or want to and I'm hoping to go and retrieve my permit soon. Passing math seems to become easier and easier with each class I take however the 52.3% I have in Gallo's V&B class is not the shiniest little ray of sunlight. I'm just kind of pondering things and I think I'm done pondering them here... I'll write again soon... hopefully...