Day 5: Wedding Day
It's wedding day! And with another wedding in the family (there have been several over the past few years amongst my cousins) comes all the obligatory jokes amongst the family about how me and my brother are the only cousins of six not married, and if we're going by age, I'm next in line. Yeah, right, marriage is so not in the cards for me right now. I'm pretty content focusing on me and not trying to tie the knot artificially. I saw a lot of family last night at the rehearsal dinner, several that I hadn't seen in years. It feels a little odd being around them; weirdly enough, it feels like I'm lying to them by being present. I know that sounds absolutely ridiculous, but it feels like I give them visual lies because I am dressed manly and I come off as a man towards them (well, maybe an effeminate man).
Anyway, I'm trying to mince my words and not tell who I don't need to tell yet. I almost told one of my cousins last night, but I kind of stumbled on my words and changed the subject. I did mention that I'd love to talk more today after the wedding. We'll see how it goes. I feel like I need to be honest with a few of my family that I know won't freak over it.
New York is an amazing place. I'll have more to write about that when I get home, but suffice to say, I'm having a blast. Currently I'm at my friend's place, taking over his living room while he's out with his girlfriend, and watching Tron: Legacy. The wedding is this afternoon. Hopefully the hormones won't make me spaz out; I freaking love weddings.
I'm at 2mg of estradiol right now, and everything is just fine. All the effects are mostly mental; I've found myself being a tad, well, hormonal. Mostly, I feel fantastic, though. I feel very calm but energetic as well. It seems to mostly have a relaxing effect on my brain. I don't know how much of that is placebo, but whatever it is, it is nice. I think my brain has just been craving the increased estrogen levels, so to speak.
Anyway, I'll try to post again before I get back, but if anything, I get back on Wednesday.
With love,
Teegan
Anyway, I'm trying to mince my words and not tell who I don't need to tell yet. I almost told one of my cousins last night, but I kind of stumbled on my words and changed the subject. I did mention that I'd love to talk more today after the wedding. We'll see how it goes. I feel like I need to be honest with a few of my family that I know won't freak over it.
New York is an amazing place. I'll have more to write about that when I get home, but suffice to say, I'm having a blast. Currently I'm at my friend's place, taking over his living room while he's out with his girlfriend, and watching Tron: Legacy. The wedding is this afternoon. Hopefully the hormones won't make me spaz out; I freaking love weddings.
I'm at 2mg of estradiol right now, and everything is just fine. All the effects are mostly mental; I've found myself being a tad, well, hormonal. Mostly, I feel fantastic, though. I feel very calm but energetic as well. It seems to mostly have a relaxing effect on my brain. I don't know how much of that is placebo, but whatever it is, it is nice. I think my brain has just been craving the increased estrogen levels, so to speak.
Anyway, I'll try to post again before I get back, but if anything, I get back on Wednesday.
With love,
Teegan