(no subject)
Okay, try to bear with me on this one. The philisophical repercussions are astronomical.
Now, I'm confident that most of you are familiar with the proof that women are evil. In case you don't, I'll post it here.
We can agree that A girlfriend is a product of time
and money right?
Girlfriend = Time * Money
Your girlfriend is a woman!
Girfriend = Woman
Woman = Time * Money
We all know that time is money...
time = money
woman = money * money
woman = (money)^2
We also know that money is the root of all evil,
correct?
money = sqrt(evil)
woman = {sqrt(evil)}^2
Hence,
woman = evil
WOMEN ARE EVIL!!!
However, what this proof does not take into account is that evil in inherently negative, and thus its root is an imaginary quantity. Therefore sqrt (that's square root, by the way) sqrt(evil)=(i)sqrt(mag(evil))=money (where "mag" denotes magnitude, or absolute value). Therefore, I present you with:
Joe's theorem: Money is imaginary.
Corallary: Women are good.
Proof or corallary: Take V to be the vector space, over the imaginary field F, to be the one in which money is expressable. Define the inner product as usual. Therefore, as above, women={sqrt(evil)}^2=sqrt(evil):sqrt(evil)=(i)sqrt(mag(evil)):(i)sqrt(mag(evil))={(i)sqrt(mag(evil))}{(i)sqrt(mag(evil))}* (note: * indicates conjugation) =(i)sqrt(mag(evil))(-i)sqrt(mag(evil))=-(i^2)(sqrt(mag(evil))^2=mag(evil) Therefore, women=mag(evil). The definition of magnitude is this: mag(a)={a if a>0, 0 if a=0, -a if a<0} So, since evil is a negative quantity, mag(evil)=-evil=good. QED
I don't know about your mind, but mine is blown. This is the metaphysical discovery of the century.
Now, I'm confident that most of you are familiar with the proof that women are evil. In case you don't, I'll post it here.
We can agree that A girlfriend is a product of time
and money right?
Girlfriend = Time * Money
Your girlfriend is a woman!
Girfriend = Woman
Woman = Time * Money
We all know that time is money...
time = money
woman = money * money
woman = (money)^2
We also know that money is the root of all evil,
correct?
money = sqrt(evil)
woman = {sqrt(evil)}^2
Hence,
woman = evil
WOMEN ARE EVIL!!!
However, what this proof does not take into account is that evil in inherently negative, and thus its root is an imaginary quantity. Therefore sqrt (that's square root, by the way) sqrt(evil)=(i)sqrt(mag(evil))=money (where "mag" denotes magnitude, or absolute value). Therefore, I present you with:
Joe's theorem: Money is imaginary.
Corallary: Women are good.
Proof or corallary: Take V to be the vector space, over the imaginary field F, to be the one in which money is expressable. Define the inner product as usual. Therefore, as above, women={sqrt(evil)}^2=sqrt(evil):sqrt(evil)=(i)sqrt(mag(evil)):(i)sqrt(mag(evil))={(i)sqrt(mag(evil))}{(i)sqrt(mag(evil))}* (note: * indicates conjugation) =(i)sqrt(mag(evil))(-i)sqrt(mag(evil))=-(i^2)(sqrt(mag(evil))^2=mag(evil) Therefore, women=mag(evil). The definition of magnitude is this: mag(a)={a if a>0, 0 if a=0, -a if a<0} So, since evil is a negative quantity, mag(evil)=-evil=good. QED
I don't know about your mind, but mine is blown. This is the metaphysical discovery of the century.