sga: kiss by number - Rodney/Ronon - PG
This is for moosesal who asked for Rodney/Ronon because the idea makes her smile. Hope the ficlet does too.
I disclaim any and all actual knowledge of increments of pressure. I've done my best to approximate. If there are any scientific types on my flist who can give me better numbers for pressure in Pascals, I will gladly adjust the numbers if they're off. *g*
ETA: reginagiraffe says to change my Pa's to mPa's and I should be good. So I did. But if I'm still wrong, anyone should feel free to correct me!
Title: kiss by numbers
Fandom, Pairing: SGA, Rodney/Ronon
Rating: PG
Word Count: 753
Summary: Rodney did not kiss Ronon first. What? He didn't.
For a guy who could take etiquette lessons from Sasquatch, Ronon's kissing technique is surprisingly refined: a gentle press (no more than 345 mPa) of closed mouth that graduates (over a period of 30 seconds) to more pressure (roughly 689 mPa) slightly parted (less than 1.5 mm) lips encompassing his partner's bottom lip with no suction; after a matching period, he permits his head to be tilted (27 degrees) by a guiding hand (the knives, watch out for the knives) and dilates his mouth (to 5 mm) to allow penetration by his partner's tongue.
Wait, hold up, what? Ronon's kissing technique? Oh god, what is he doing?
More to the point, how is he going to stop doing it before something embarrassing (like a moan, because that thing with the tongue stroking, oh god, and the lip nibbling) happens?
He could just let it continue. It's not unpleasant, Sheppard won't mind (it's not like he isn't kissing Sasquatch, the 'Jumper's on auto-pilot, they won't reach the surface for several hours -- 3 hours and seventeen minutes -- if there hasn't been a course correction, while he's been lip-locked…with…Ronon)-
"Oh god, okay. Play dumb. You can do that, can't you?"
"Of course, I can. I'm good at it."
His ego smirks.
His libido scowls.
Hands on hips, his ego looks pointedly at his rising erection. "Well?"
After the lip-suck, tongue-stroke combination that makes his pants that much tighter (can't be more than 800 mPa but it feels like a lot more, oh god), he plants his hand on Ronon's (impressive) pectoral muscle and shoves (not hard; what? he's only playing dumb). "What the hell was that?"
Arm over head, Ronon grips the mass of his dreadlocks, then his (moist, shiny) lips quirk and his eyes crinkle at the corners. "On Sateda, we called it kissing."
Rodney scoots to the far end of the bench, then crosses his arms over his chest. His mouth is doing that down-turned twist thing (it is impossible for a face to freeze, thank you, Lt. Colonel Sheppard); he can feel the strain in his cheek. "Har har. Very funny." He glares at Ronon, who (faces down Wraith queens in his spare time with his bare hands, my god why is he glaring at this man?) is unmoved. "What I meant was, why did you kiss me?"
Inhaling deeply (look at that ribcage expand; wow, he really is huge) Ronon shakes his head. "I didn't."
"Do you mean to suggest that I kissed you?"
"Yes."
"Well that's--" (True, entirely and completely true.) "That's preposterous! I don't even find you attractive." (Ronon's teeth are showing. Why are Ronon's teeth showing?) "Which isn't to say I've looked at you in that way at all, or even that I might not find you attractive if I did-"
"McKay." Ronon slides down the bench until he looms (yes, looms) over him. "You kissed me. But if it makes you feel any better-"
His technique hasn't gotten any worse in the past few (3.75) minutes. There's the head-tilt and that nibble-suck, tongue-stroking thing again (okay, he could get used to this, especially the part where Ronon makes that little growling noise that's sort of like a whimper and) -- hey, wait! "What're you-"
Ronon smirks. "Now I kissed you. Better?"
"Yes. I mean, no." Why did you stop? "Oh for crying out loud, I didn't kiss you in the first place. One second I was looking at you and you were doing that smiling thing you do when no one's looking and, all right, fine, I might've had the thought that it would be interesting to kiss you, but I certainly didn't act on it, and the next thing I knew you were doing that…" He waves a hand. "Tongue thing."
"Kissing."
"Yes, fine, whatever. Kissing. We were kissing. Are you happy now? We were kissing. Can we move beyond that?"
Ronon arches an eyebrow.
"Oh my god, no, you are not - I did not just - forget it. Forget I said anything." He tries to break from Ronon's (amused) gaze, but the wall is in his way. "I think I liked it better when your mouth was busy."
"I'm not the one who-"
"Shut up. Just shut up." Rodney puts his hands over his ears. He knows it's (childish and ridiculous) not helping, but he doesn't care, and, oh great, now Ronon's doing that tiny-smile thing that made him want to kiss him in the first place.
Other first kisses so far:
the truth according to Sam (SPN, Sam/Dean, R)
let it fill the space between (Heroes, Mohinder/Peter, PG13)
passing glimmer warms beneath your skin (Heroes, Nathan/Mohinder, R)
just an ordinary day (RPS, Jared/Jensen, R)
on the effect of nine well-chosen words (DCU, Bruce/Dick, R)
variations on a theme or three (heroes/spn, Claire kisses John W., but not romantically, PG)
I disclaim any and all actual knowledge of increments of pressure. I've done my best to approximate. If there are any scientific types on my flist who can give me better numbers for pressure in Pascals, I will gladly adjust the numbers if they're off. *g*
ETA: reginagiraffe says to change my Pa's to mPa's and I should be good. So I did. But if I'm still wrong, anyone should feel free to correct me!
Title: kiss by numbers
Fandom, Pairing: SGA, Rodney/Ronon
Rating: PG
Word Count: 753
Summary: Rodney did not kiss Ronon first. What? He didn't.
For a guy who could take etiquette lessons from Sasquatch, Ronon's kissing technique is surprisingly refined: a gentle press (no more than 345 mPa) of closed mouth that graduates (over a period of 30 seconds) to more pressure (roughly 689 mPa) slightly parted (less than 1.5 mm) lips encompassing his partner's bottom lip with no suction; after a matching period, he permits his head to be tilted (27 degrees) by a guiding hand (the knives, watch out for the knives) and dilates his mouth (to 5 mm) to allow penetration by his partner's tongue.
Wait, hold up, what? Ronon's kissing technique? Oh god, what is he doing?
More to the point, how is he going to stop doing it before something embarrassing (like a moan, because that thing with the tongue stroking, oh god, and the lip nibbling) happens?
He could just let it continue. It's not unpleasant, Sheppard won't mind (it's not like he isn't kissing Sasquatch, the 'Jumper's on auto-pilot, they won't reach the surface for several hours -- 3 hours and seventeen minutes -- if there hasn't been a course correction, while he's been lip-locked…with…Ronon)-
"Oh god, okay. Play dumb. You can do that, can't you?"
"Of course, I can. I'm good at it."
His ego smirks.
His libido scowls.
Hands on hips, his ego looks pointedly at his rising erection. "Well?"
After the lip-suck, tongue-stroke combination that makes his pants that much tighter (can't be more than 800 mPa but it feels like a lot more, oh god), he plants his hand on Ronon's (impressive) pectoral muscle and shoves (not hard; what? he's only playing dumb). "What the hell was that?"
Arm over head, Ronon grips the mass of his dreadlocks, then his (moist, shiny) lips quirk and his eyes crinkle at the corners. "On Sateda, we called it kissing."
Rodney scoots to the far end of the bench, then crosses his arms over his chest. His mouth is doing that down-turned twist thing (it is impossible for a face to freeze, thank you, Lt. Colonel Sheppard); he can feel the strain in his cheek. "Har har. Very funny." He glares at Ronon, who (faces down Wraith queens in his spare time with his bare hands, my god why is he glaring at this man?) is unmoved. "What I meant was, why did you kiss me?"
Inhaling deeply (look at that ribcage expand; wow, he really is huge) Ronon shakes his head. "I didn't."
"Do you mean to suggest that I kissed you?"
"Yes."
"Well that's--" (True, entirely and completely true.) "That's preposterous! I don't even find you attractive." (Ronon's teeth are showing. Why are Ronon's teeth showing?) "Which isn't to say I've looked at you in that way at all, or even that I might not find you attractive if I did-"
"McKay." Ronon slides down the bench until he looms (yes, looms) over him. "You kissed me. But if it makes you feel any better-"
His technique hasn't gotten any worse in the past few (3.75) minutes. There's the head-tilt and that nibble-suck, tongue-stroking thing again (okay, he could get used to this, especially the part where Ronon makes that little growling noise that's sort of like a whimper and) -- hey, wait! "What're you-"
Ronon smirks. "Now I kissed you. Better?"
"Yes. I mean, no." Why did you stop? "Oh for crying out loud, I didn't kiss you in the first place. One second I was looking at you and you were doing that smiling thing you do when no one's looking and, all right, fine, I might've had the thought that it would be interesting to kiss you, but I certainly didn't act on it, and the next thing I knew you were doing that…" He waves a hand. "Tongue thing."
"Kissing."
"Yes, fine, whatever. Kissing. We were kissing. Are you happy now? We were kissing. Can we move beyond that?"
Ronon arches an eyebrow.
"Oh my god, no, you are not - I did not just - forget it. Forget I said anything." He tries to break from Ronon's (amused) gaze, but the wall is in his way. "I think I liked it better when your mouth was busy."
"I'm not the one who-"
"Shut up. Just shut up." Rodney puts his hands over his ears. He knows it's (childish and ridiculous) not helping, but he doesn't care, and, oh great, now Ronon's doing that tiny-smile thing that made him want to kiss him in the first place.
Other first kisses so far:
the truth according to Sam (SPN, Sam/Dean, R)
let it fill the space between (Heroes, Mohinder/Peter, PG13)
passing glimmer warms beneath your skin (Heroes, Nathan/Mohinder, R)
just an ordinary day (RPS, Jared/Jensen, R)
on the effect of nine well-chosen words (DCU, Bruce/Dick, R)
variations on a theme or three (heroes/spn, Claire kisses John W., but not romantically, PG)