(no subject)
I have never felt so alone, so screwed up, so alienated in my entire life. I don't think I've ever cried this much either. This pain is unbearable. I thought today would be the answer to all of my problems, it turned out to be the start of the worst of them. My parents think there's something emotionally wrong with me and they want me to see a psychatrist... it's not gonna help. For once in my life I don't feel like I'm in control... I am scared shitless. Have I really changed that much? Am I really the bitch that so many have made me out to be? Maybe I am, I have just been diluting myself. My friends think I'm nice, why would they lie? They wouldn't... I just don't know what's wrong, but I need to get away from everything. I want a new life, I wanna start over from scratch, and this time, everything will be right. God, Jesus, every saint in the heavens, I need you more now than I have ever needed you in my entire life. Please, just don't turn away from me.
"Do not avoid eyes or let me anger you. Do not toss me aside, O God do not drop me."
"Do not avoid eyes or let me anger you. Do not toss me aside, O God do not drop me."