FM Challenge #46 Marriage fandom_muses

Nov 14, 2006 21:23

Marriage? I haven’t thought of marriage, well in what seems a lifetime. At first, it was a means to end. I was promised to another at an early age, a promise that as a child I relished, when things were bad, I’d dream he’d come and take me away to some better. Imagining myself a Romany princess, my fantasies continued into my teens, where I began to plan the perfect wedding to what I thought would be my prince charming. It was a word that changed it all. A word that made me rebel, eventually running away. I’ve learned not to be reactive, and still to this day think my plan would have worked.

But the clan stretched farther than I could imagine, and I was brought back kicking and screaming, until I met him, at first by accident and then by design. Even now, when I close my eyes and picture his face, I can still get lost in his eyes. Do you ever get over your first love?

Still, marrying him was a means to an end, to get out, and I’d be betraying myself to think otherwise. Yet, as I got to know him he wasn’t a means he was the end for me, all I wanted it in everything. Romany magic changed it all; the Kalderash clan always changes everything.

It took a long time for me to find another to love, and marriage with him, well, it never got that far, and there were always demons to kill, a past to contend with and a slayer to watch.

Marriage has never been in the cards for me, and at this point, I am technically a walking corpse, and what person in their right mind would marry a corpse? So on the question of marriage, I’ve never known what it might mean to me and at this point in my life, or afterlife, or whatever this trek might me, I don’t want to find out.

Muse: Jenny Calendar
Fandom: Buffy
Word Count: 328
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