Everything
Ok so I bounce in and out of LJ but hey that is what LJ is for, neh? Ah well. Back in the valley but SNAFU'ed to hell.
Want: To smush people and make them shut the hell up.
Reason: Matt is royally pissed right now because despite everything he tries to do people try to get him to do shit he says he doesn't want to or won't do. So he's venting and is trying not to throw it in my face but I end up not having any time with him due to his either being not available due to doing shit for them or is so pissed that he doesn't want to be around me so he doesn't do something he'll regret.
Want: To destory IH
Reason: Without this crap my life would be on track and we wouldn't be living with our parents. Yeah I'm 23 no degree no job because I'm constantly dizzy and have a headache akin to a migraine. Fun times.
Want: To be an independent adult
Reason: Who doesn't that isn't seriously damaged or disturbed? Ok so I'm seriously both but I still want it because my family is worse. I reference the great Bart Simpson, "You'd think living in a house of crazy people would be fun. It's actually really depressing."
Want: To have friends
Reason: Making friends has always been really hard for me and with the 4 years disappearing off the face of the planet due to IH didn't help me with the ones I had. Now I'm practically tabula rasa on friends and without school to start to meet people, I'm pretty lost on making new ones.
Want: To have enough income to support myself
Reason: Really do I have to explain this one? I want to be able to save up for video games, eat food, have some fucking privacy for gods' sakes.
Want: To just be able to have some fucking time with my husband unsupervised
Reason: YEAH YOU HEARD ME! Right now living with his family my mother, my husband, and I are couch crashing in the dining/living room. We were promised a room of our own, with a door, and his fucking brother decided he wanted it instead. So he got it, just like his wedding present to Matt and our anniversary present this year. He liked it better so it was automatically his. He doesn't sleep in there, no he sleeps with the youngest sister (yeah you read that right his youngest sister). Instead his desk and crap lives in there and we sleep on couches without any privacy at all. To get laid we have to wait until everyone is gone, rarely happens at all since my mom is scared of these fucktards and clings to us practically non-stop, or stow away in the backyard or bathroom. Yeah. I'm not into that. I like the bed, with privacy and freedom to do what we want without care of who might walk or peek in. On top of that we just like to hang out and be ourselves. Play TCG's, video games, board games, talk, bull shit, watch whatever we want even if it is Logan's Run because we want some canned cheese.
Want: To follow my path
Reason: Because his family is a bunch of fucking hypocrites, I have to be the good Mormon girl for them. I get shit for cussing, dressing un-modestly (I like the look of my shoulders so have lots of tank-tops cause it's also GOD DAMNED FUCKING ARIZONA!!!), watching stuff that is explicit in any way, not believing in their version of creationism, speaking against a male figure, not taking their shit and thanking them for the opportunity for it.
Want: To keep my possessions
Reason: Fuck them and their stealing my things. I have very few things and they take the best that I saved up for and worked my ass off for because I couldn't possibly have wanted or gotten these things. I have to lie everyday and say that the Wii that I got as a final present to Matt and me before we dedicated all our income to paying down debt (before I lost my job) is my mother's. I have to do this so they don't help themselves to it, lend it to people I don't know, break it, and then ask if they can (I then say no and they have to weasel their way through and come up with a lie that someone else said they asked me or Matt and it is already gone, broken, etc).
Want: To go back to school and get a degree that I can use with my IH
Reason: My practically finished Theatre degree is not useable because i am no longer physically able to do theatre work. That's that. I just want to go back to school for my degree in Japanese so that I can possibly work someday.
What I Have: People yelling in Spanish all times of the day and night. People helping themselves to my things like it's the stuff out on the curb for pick up. People stealing my husband from me to "perform family duties." People complaining that my husband and I should get jobs (despite my being sick and him taking care of me), that I sleep too much, that we should be grateful and welcome them to take everything that they want from us out of sheer gratitude that they are letting us sleep on a couch out of some twisted sense of familial duty. People hollaring "What stinks? It smells like toilet," constantly. People screaming I should shower, right after I shower. People yelling "This shit needs to be cleaned up now!" People not even leaving Matt and I be long enough to watch a 27 minute TV show over the internet together without being interrupted at least twice, if we're lucky. No money at all so have to scrape and do whatever they want for 5 bucks to buy some soap, shampoo, etc. No real transportation since my car is in a different county and we don't have the money to insure, register, gas, etc it, even if it was here.
Reason: IH
Want: To smush people and make them shut the hell up.
Reason: Matt is royally pissed right now because despite everything he tries to do people try to get him to do shit he says he doesn't want to or won't do. So he's venting and is trying not to throw it in my face but I end up not having any time with him due to his either being not available due to doing shit for them or is so pissed that he doesn't want to be around me so he doesn't do something he'll regret.
Want: To destory IH
Reason: Without this crap my life would be on track and we wouldn't be living with our parents. Yeah I'm 23 no degree no job because I'm constantly dizzy and have a headache akin to a migraine. Fun times.
Want: To be an independent adult
Reason: Who doesn't that isn't seriously damaged or disturbed? Ok so I'm seriously both but I still want it because my family is worse. I reference the great Bart Simpson, "You'd think living in a house of crazy people would be fun. It's actually really depressing."
Want: To have friends
Reason: Making friends has always been really hard for me and with the 4 years disappearing off the face of the planet due to IH didn't help me with the ones I had. Now I'm practically tabula rasa on friends and without school to start to meet people, I'm pretty lost on making new ones.
Want: To have enough income to support myself
Reason: Really do I have to explain this one? I want to be able to save up for video games, eat food, have some fucking privacy for gods' sakes.
Want: To just be able to have some fucking time with my husband unsupervised
Reason: YEAH YOU HEARD ME! Right now living with his family my mother, my husband, and I are couch crashing in the dining/living room. We were promised a room of our own, with a door, and his fucking brother decided he wanted it instead. So he got it, just like his wedding present to Matt and our anniversary present this year. He liked it better so it was automatically his. He doesn't sleep in there, no he sleeps with the youngest sister (yeah you read that right his youngest sister). Instead his desk and crap lives in there and we sleep on couches without any privacy at all. To get laid we have to wait until everyone is gone, rarely happens at all since my mom is scared of these fucktards and clings to us practically non-stop, or stow away in the backyard or bathroom. Yeah. I'm not into that. I like the bed, with privacy and freedom to do what we want without care of who might walk or peek in. On top of that we just like to hang out and be ourselves. Play TCG's, video games, board games, talk, bull shit, watch whatever we want even if it is Logan's Run because we want some canned cheese.
Want: To follow my path
Reason: Because his family is a bunch of fucking hypocrites, I have to be the good Mormon girl for them. I get shit for cussing, dressing un-modestly (I like the look of my shoulders so have lots of tank-tops cause it's also GOD DAMNED FUCKING ARIZONA!!!), watching stuff that is explicit in any way, not believing in their version of creationism, speaking against a male figure, not taking their shit and thanking them for the opportunity for it.
Want: To keep my possessions
Reason: Fuck them and their stealing my things. I have very few things and they take the best that I saved up for and worked my ass off for because I couldn't possibly have wanted or gotten these things. I have to lie everyday and say that the Wii that I got as a final present to Matt and me before we dedicated all our income to paying down debt (before I lost my job) is my mother's. I have to do this so they don't help themselves to it, lend it to people I don't know, break it, and then ask if they can (I then say no and they have to weasel their way through and come up with a lie that someone else said they asked me or Matt and it is already gone, broken, etc).
Want: To go back to school and get a degree that I can use with my IH
Reason: My practically finished Theatre degree is not useable because i am no longer physically able to do theatre work. That's that. I just want to go back to school for my degree in Japanese so that I can possibly work someday.
What I Have: People yelling in Spanish all times of the day and night. People helping themselves to my things like it's the stuff out on the curb for pick up. People stealing my husband from me to "perform family duties." People complaining that my husband and I should get jobs (despite my being sick and him taking care of me), that I sleep too much, that we should be grateful and welcome them to take everything that they want from us out of sheer gratitude that they are letting us sleep on a couch out of some twisted sense of familial duty. People hollaring "What stinks? It smells like toilet," constantly. People screaming I should shower, right after I shower. People yelling "This shit needs to be cleaned up now!" People not even leaving Matt and I be long enough to watch a 27 minute TV show over the internet together without being interrupted at least twice, if we're lucky. No money at all so have to scrape and do whatever they want for 5 bucks to buy some soap, shampoo, etc. No real transportation since my car is in a different county and we don't have the money to insure, register, gas, etc it, even if it was here.
Reason: IH