if you could only see the beast you've made of me

[tearsthrulife]

If asked, Rahne wouldn't say that she's gotten soft. After years spent on various teams, she doesn't think it would be possible to lose that edge and the instincts that have been instilled in her, even in a place that isn't much more than a permanent vacation. What she has done, though, is begun to relax a little in the months she's been here. Even

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[provenhumanity]

George wasn't sure what he was seeing at first. It was almost like something out of his worst nightmares: the ones where he woke up covered in blood the morning after a change with no idea where he might have gone or what he might have done. Where he had no idea who he might have killed.

If he hadn't been absolutely sure that he hadn't transformed, he might have thought that he was to blame. At least, he was pretty sure he hadn't. Even so, that had been a week ago, and this looked like it had only just happened.

George blinked a few times, horrified by the scene in front of him, but somehow not able to look away.

"Oh my god." He said, voice shaky. "Rahne?"

[tearsthrulife]

Rahne winces instinctively at the sound of her name, though it doesn't quite register yet who's speaking, only that she isn't alone anymore. Here in the snow like this, shivering and crying with this in front of her, she probably looks like a madwoman and she knows it, but being aware of it doesn't give her half enough energy it would take to pull herself together. That simply isn't an option now.

"I'm sorry," she says, like she has something to be apologizing to George for. Maybe she does; it isn't like this could be pleasant to look at, and it's her fault this happened, her fault it showed up here. "I never wanted - I'm so sorry."

[provenhumanity]

Frowning, George looked away from the bloody mess in front of Rahne, falling to his knees to kneel in the snow next to her.

"It's alright," He said, barely able to pull himself together long enough to say so. Even if it might have been a lie. This was too much like that night in the alley with Becca. There was that same horrible feeling in the pit of his stomach.

"What happened? Did-- did you...?"

[tearsthrulife]

"Aye," Rahne says, nodding, figuring it's safe to assume that he's asking if she did this. It's a logical question, of course; there really is only one thing to take from a girl crouched in front of a bloody corpse like this when there's no one else around.

Still, despite the fact that she shouldn't get to care about what he might think of her, seeing something like this, she does anyway. She wants to explain, but there's too much to tell, and it wouldn't do much good even if she could. "Back home, I - I didn't mean to, it just happened."

[provenhumanity]

It made sense, didn't it? One of the only people he talked to on a semi-regular basis was a murderer, however accidental. Of course. It was the story of his life these days.

But it wasn't as if he could judge, was it? He'd been friends with Mitchell, even though he knew that Mitchell had killed. That years before George had even been born, he'd taken lives. And George himself....well, back home, he sometimes felt like a bit of a ticking time bomb. Eventually he'd slip up and someone would be hurt. Eventually, the wolf would be too much.

"We should go," George said, his voice quiet, possibly only loud enough for Rahne to hear, "Before someone else turns up."

[tearsthrulife]

"And just leave him?" Rahne asks, unable to hide the tremble in her voice. The last thing she needs is for someone to think it was a crime that happened here, go looking for a killer; she'd have to confess, then, and more people than just George would know what she could do. "I don't - he's my father, I can't -"

Though she's well aware that she probably isn't making much sense, her head is spinning too much to piece together any proper explanation. There are too many things she wants to say and no good way of saying them, and anyway, none of them would make her any less a killer.

[provenhumanity]

"Your-- he's your..." George said, too shocked to even get the words out. "Christ."

But the longer they stayed there, the more likely someone else would turn up, asking questions. And even though Rahne believed her when she'd said it happened back home, some people didn't seem as fond of the idea of a 'blank slate' as others.

"We could get a shovel. I mean-- I mean, I could stay here and you could go and get one. We-- we could bury him."

He could cover it up with snow first. Keep it hidden. God, he'd thought this part of his life was over.

[tearsthrulife]

Rahne winces instinctively at his initial reaction, no matter how much she knows she deserves it. It's one thing to have been what she was, one thing to have been capable of doing this, but to have done it to her own father is another entirely. She's the worst kind of sinner. He was right about her all along, and however ironically, never so much as when he died.

"I'll stay," she says, shaking her head. Other than that, it's the best plan she could think of. It isn't like there's really anything else to be done, nothing that would be permanent enough. "So if ye don't mind... I'll understand if ye don't."

[provenhumanity]

The first thing George had thought was that Rahne shouldn't be left alone with...with this. Considering how he'd found her crouched in the snow, he couldn't help but think that was a really horrible idea.

"We'll cover it up first," George said, "With-- with snow. In case someone happens by in the meantime."

[tearsthrulife]

It's Rahne's first impulse to say that no, it'll be fine just as it is, but somewhere through all her disconnected thoughts, she manages to consider just how ill-advised that would be. Even if George isn't gone long, it isn't worth the risk of someone wandering by at the wrong time.

"Alright," she breathes, but although her hands unclasp in her lap, she can't quite bring herself to do anything. "Just in case."

[provenhumanity]

"Alright." George said, breathing a sigh of relief, though the ordeal was nowhere near over. He dug his un-gloved hands into the snow nearby, shoveling some onto the bloody mess in front of them.

If his hands were shaking, it probably wasn't due to the cold.

[tearsthrulife]

"Thank ye for this," Rahne murmurs, glancing up at George from the body. She can't quite move yet -- that takes a few more moments, and even when she does, the motions are tentative, almost frightened -- so it's the least she can do to make sure he knows that she doesn't take his helping her lightly. "Ye shouldn't have to go through all this trouble because I was..."

Unsure how she means to finish the sentence, she trails off, the words hanging heavy in the air. Rather than trying to fumble for a response, though, she turns her attention back to the remains, covering them with snow as carefully as she can.

[provenhumanity]

"It's...It's alright." George replied, though there was nothing, absolutely nothing about any of this that was alright. There was nothing okay about kneeling there in the snow, burying someone's remains. "It was an accident."

From the way she'd spoken, that was the way it had sounded, but George couldn't help but want to know just how something like this could happen.

Now wasn't the time to ask though. Sometime later, after they'd finished, he'd ask, but not yet.

[tearsthrulife]

"Aye," Rahne says, voice still quiet, a breath catching in her throat. "He was still right about me."

Any other time, and she'd realize how cryptic and jumbled it all sounds, given that he barely knows the first thing about her. It takes enough effort for her to even piece together a sentence, though, and as such, it seems good enough.

[provenhumanity]

"What do you mean?" George asked, still shoveling snow, though his hands were starting to sting from the cold. It was probably ridiculous to have some sort of conversation now, with this happening, but he couldn't help but wonder what she meant.

[tearsthrulife]

Telling him isn't a problem -- by now, it's only fair -- but even figuring out where to start is. Rahne goes still again, closing her eyes as she draws in a deep breath, then swallows, paying no mind to what she'd been doing as she looks up at George.

"Back home, for me, there were... people with powers," she begins, head spinning already. It isn't complicated, not to her, but explaining it is nearly more than she can handle. It's only another glance at her father's body that makes her continue. "Mutants, evolved humans. There are comics, ye might've seen them. But my father, he... he hated them. Us." With the weight of that, she pauses, barely noticing that her eyes are brimming with tears again. "Then he... It's a long story, but my power was I could turn into a wolf. We were fighting, and I changed before I knew what I was doing. I'm sorry."