holding on...
so im not letting go... like at all. im wearing the damned hoodie and jack. i havent done nething overly "ho-ish" even tho technology im single. i dont even talk to chris ne more and yet im still like *CLING*
today was rather odd. i texted him on jacks cell and i was like "its me on jack cell (cuz earlyer i left a message)" and he responded back "hiya kaci?" i was like "uh not quite" it was strange. and rather angering. and it pisses me off that i have to hear about chris and kaci's random acts of rape-ige from a girl i hate (liz brekke). gurrr. its not that i really wanna no i just dont like not being informed like she could have said she saw him or SomeThing. idk.
neways. so i promised chris, back when it was still likely that we'd go out again, that i wouldnt cut or smoke. i wanna i reallly .... REALLLY wanna but (note the holding on) i cant. im still waiting. and i feel that ill be waiting for some time. this doesnt xsite me xpesally since chris' feelings change about as often as my undies. ... whoa its my song.... I NEVER MENT TO BE SO COLD!!!
i feel like a doll... being pushed away as i force myself at ppl. and others pull me close and i try to run but cant. i just need love. i need affection. but not from surten ppl... such as jordan. now that kid can suck my dick. idc how much he loves me. im not gonna go there rite now. god im psycho. id even k how to rite half of this shit.
heres it summed up....
i cant let go of chris... even tho it was a kinda pathetic relaionship... it was fun and good... for a whie.
i want jordan to stop saying he loves me its rather uncomfortable. i dont wanna lie, but then again i dont want him on my ass.
i wish jil and denis would just make up and be all happi together again its really annoying them being fucked like... and david just needs to stick to his girl and leave jil the fuck alone
ppl at my skool dont get me ne more and all my friends, really dont either. idc how much we have in common.
i dont wanna talk to ne 1 but i want every1 to come and talk to me. i need to feel needed and im not. the last 4 days i called no1 (xsept today) and i in return got no calls. i felt unloved as i do now.
my crushes r lame and i dont really like em ne more. my friends also lame. my classes continue to be lame. and my love life has always been and never will stop being lame.
today was rather odd. i texted him on jacks cell and i was like "its me on jack cell (cuz earlyer i left a message)" and he responded back "hiya kaci?" i was like "uh not quite" it was strange. and rather angering. and it pisses me off that i have to hear about chris and kaci's random acts of rape-ige from a girl i hate (liz brekke). gurrr. its not that i really wanna no i just dont like not being informed like she could have said she saw him or SomeThing. idk.
neways. so i promised chris, back when it was still likely that we'd go out again, that i wouldnt cut or smoke. i wanna i reallly .... REALLLY wanna but (note the holding on) i cant. im still waiting. and i feel that ill be waiting for some time. this doesnt xsite me xpesally since chris' feelings change about as often as my undies. ... whoa its my song.... I NEVER MENT TO BE SO COLD!!!
i feel like a doll... being pushed away as i force myself at ppl. and others pull me close and i try to run but cant. i just need love. i need affection. but not from surten ppl... such as jordan. now that kid can suck my dick. idc how much he loves me. im not gonna go there rite now. god im psycho. id even k how to rite half of this shit.
heres it summed up....
i cant let go of chris... even tho it was a kinda pathetic relaionship... it was fun and good... for a whie.
i want jordan to stop saying he loves me its rather uncomfortable. i dont wanna lie, but then again i dont want him on my ass.
i wish jil and denis would just make up and be all happi together again its really annoying them being fucked like... and david just needs to stick to his girl and leave jil the fuck alone
ppl at my skool dont get me ne more and all my friends, really dont either. idc how much we have in common.
i dont wanna talk to ne 1 but i want every1 to come and talk to me. i need to feel needed and im not. the last 4 days i called no1 (xsept today) and i in return got no calls. i felt unloved as i do now.
my crushes r lame and i dont really like em ne more. my friends also lame. my classes continue to be lame. and my love life has always been and never will stop being lame.