Nikita,
Last night as i was cleaning through my things, i stumbled across all of your letters. I was up very late reading through each one of them again. I realized, that i have no memory, of ever telling you what you did for me, never thanking you. Now its very possiable i may never get that chance again.
It's been about 8 months since we last spoke, I want you to know, that those days that you would call me every night, as we speak for hours are missed, you kept me together, when my world was falling apart. then as time passed, how i looked foreward to all of your letter's. I am sorry i never made it to your graduation.
But now, now somehow i feel so much regret, for not giving back to you, what you gave to me. you know that sand gets into everything, i'm sure its making your job alot more intersting, cleaning sand out of wires, and gauges, and in places where you really have no idea how it even gets there. I'm not sure where are now, but i have an idea, your days are never dull, the constant change, the constant threat over there. it makes it hard to sleep sometiems, and long for that little place of quiet we call home. long for friends, and voices you have not spoken to in month, as you wonder if they even think of you or remember you.
Whatever it is you decide to do, the month's and years after your service, nothing that you will deal with, will ever match up to the amount of stress, adversity and at times desperation that you experiance there. you will see the worst of people, it comes out so easily, people who you might have even respected, turn out to be driven by their own self indulgeance. There is something else though, that shines through all that mess that you're in, something that even redeems at times the awful things you see. That bravery, that just one person shows, and knowing that, what it means, it changes you. you saw it at first when you were in basic, and now you see it more. We saw it, that one thing, it keeps me wakeing up, it keeps driving me, it holds my tongue, when i should lose it, it makes me smile off insults, because in my heart, i know what i've done, i know what i have been through, and i know that i belong to a very small and very elite group of men and women, and we all, were very brave.
God be with you Nikita,
your friend always
Jason
It's been about 8 months since we last spoke, I want you to know, that those days that you would call me every night, as we speak for hours are missed, you kept me together, when my world was falling apart. then as time passed, how i looked foreward to all of your letter's. I am sorry i never made it to your graduation.
But now, now somehow i feel so much regret, for not giving back to you, what you gave to me. you know that sand gets into everything, i'm sure its making your job alot more intersting, cleaning sand out of wires, and gauges, and in places where you really have no idea how it even gets there. I'm not sure where are now, but i have an idea, your days are never dull, the constant change, the constant threat over there. it makes it hard to sleep sometiems, and long for that little place of quiet we call home. long for friends, and voices you have not spoken to in month, as you wonder if they even think of you or remember you.
Whatever it is you decide to do, the month's and years after your service, nothing that you will deal with, will ever match up to the amount of stress, adversity and at times desperation that you experiance there. you will see the worst of people, it comes out so easily, people who you might have even respected, turn out to be driven by their own self indulgeance. There is something else though, that shines through all that mess that you're in, something that even redeems at times the awful things you see. That bravery, that just one person shows, and knowing that, what it means, it changes you. you saw it at first when you were in basic, and now you see it more. We saw it, that one thing, it keeps me wakeing up, it keeps driving me, it holds my tongue, when i should lose it, it makes me smile off insults, because in my heart, i know what i've done, i know what i have been through, and i know that i belong to a very small and very elite group of men and women, and we all, were very brave.
God be with you Nikita,
your friend always
Jason