The Fourth Adventure of (sorta) Sock and Underoosa: Chapter 2
Title: One More Time They Weren’t, Chapter Two
Fandom: Star Trek: Reboot
Characters: Kirk, Uhura, Spock
A/N: This is the second chapter of the final of the four stories.
Warnings: pure crack; references to sexual situations
Disclaimer: I don't anything related to Star Trek, and I still haven't bought any new Underoos.
( Read Story One, Chap. 1 )
( Read Story One, Chap. 2 )
( Read Story One, Chap. 3 )
( Read Story Two, Chap. 1 )
( Read Story Two, Chap. 2 )
( Read Story Two, Chap. 3 )
( Read Story Three, Chap. 1 )
( Read Story Three, Chap. 2 )
( Read Story Three, Chap. 3 )
( Read Story Four, Chap. 1 )
Since his secret was out anyway, somehow it didn’t seem like a bad idea to start expanding his collection. While women’s underwear were unquestionably the luckiest, Kirk realized a similar benefit could be garnered from other articles of clothing.
_____
The first time Spock went on a dangerous away mission without her- well, all away missions were potentially dangerous; just look at what happened to them the time Spock pissed off a baby goddess with a lisp and an attitude problem.
The first time Spock went on an unquestionably dangerous away mission without her, Uhura ended up spending the night in Kirk’s quarters.
It wasn’t her choice. She wasn’t trying to sublimate her fear for her mate by having unbridled sex with her admittedly sexy superior officer. Uhura first stepped through Jim’s doors under doctor’s orders.
“I know you want to stay in your rooms, wallowing in grief even before those Artoorites do most of us a favor and kill your pointy-eared paramour. But that ain’t no good for you and it shore as hell ain’t good for the pointy-eared progeny you’re lugging around right now.”
Jim Kirk, Bones promised, could bore her so silly she’d be able to sleep through a photon torpedo attack. She hadn’t wanted to go. She didn’t see the wisdom of hanging out with the man who’d sent her Vulcan down to what could very well be his death with no one but Ensign Pavel Andreievich Chekov to watch his back. (Except that maybe there wouldn’t be anyone around to stop her from killing Kirk when the news came). The doctor just waved aside her worries - and threats - saying, “This ain’t a request, Gorgeous!”
When pulling rank didn’t work, Leonard McCoy wasn’t above playing woe-is-me and asking her if she wanted to be responsible for his broken arm when Spock found out he hadn’t made sure she’d accepted the best cure of pregnancy-related insomnia the Alpha Quadrant had to offer.
“That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard come out of your mouth,” she grumped instead of pointing out that she wouldn’t even be in this predicament if the damned contraceptives he’d prescribed for her and her husband had actually worked, damn it!
“But it’s working, idinit?”
He winked at her, the corner of his mouth lifting in a way that looked nothing like Spock’s half-smile. And even more appealing than Kirk’s half-lidded grin. She felt a shiver of… something tickle her in places she didn’t want to be tickled. At least, not by anyone who wasn’t named S’chn T’gai Spock.
Damned pregnancy hormones! Damned sexy crew
She let McCoy tuck her hand into the crook of his elbow, wondering which would kill her first: worrying about Spock? or resisting the forbidden fruits of the Enterprise?
“Kirk better be as boring as hell,” she warned the doctor.
__________
Jim Kirk knew damned well telling titillating stories of his conquests was unlikely to keep Uhura’s mind off her husband. He knew it when Spock’s grave voice had ordered - there was no question that it was an order - him to keep an eye on his wife. He knew it when Bones had comm’ed him, saying, “You gotta do something about that lovely lady.” And he knew it when he started making plans for that evening’s entertainment.
He just hadn’t known how wildly unsuccessful all of his efforts would turn out to be. It was like Uhura had morphed into a completely different woman the minute Spock had beamed down to the surface of Kamalut.
By the time she politely refused to continue their discussion about the newly-discovered sub-equatorial moon variant of Northern Hammurabian (despite rumors to the contrary, he hadn’t become treasurer of the Xenolinguistics club just because of the available eye-candy), he was fresh out of ideas and knew he was in trouble.
Before leaving, the Vulcan had warned, “Since the advent of her pregnancy, Lieutenant Uhura has occasionally proven to be something of a challenge.”
Jim’s sneaking suspicion that Spock got off on that challenge was confirmed when he’d smirked and asked, “Do I even want to know?”
Spock had replied with all appearance of seriousness. “Probably. I am almost certain you would want to know.” Then, he’d done something Jim had never seen him do before. Spock’s lips had tilted up just the slightest bit at the corners as he said almost dreamily, “But I am even more certain that I shall not explain.”
Kirk knew enough about the various effects of pregnancy hormones on the female body to guess what had his first officer damn-near grinning. Obviously, that kind of distraction was out- unless… no. If Uhura didn’t kill him for trying, Spock would. And Jim didn’t like the odds of him living long enough for Spock to end his misery quickly.
Babysitting his communications chief was almost as arduous as keeping her husband company was when she was the one off-ship.
“What do you say we just go to bed?”
Poor choice of words.
But the Infamous Uhura Death Glare wasn’t exactly unexpected, so he managed to grin through his exhaustion and exasperation.
“Seriously, Uhura, you need to sleep. And all this worrying can’t be good for the kid.”
“Being fatherless won’t be good for him, either!” she snapped. And then, just to make him feel even more like an ass, she started to cry. “I-I’m sorry, J-Jim,” she wailed, burying her face in her hands.
As he wrapped his arms around her, encouraging her to stand and walk towards the bedroom, Kirk made a mental note to have Bones quadruple check his store of birth control hypos. And to order some extra-strength condoms for himself.
__________
“I’m not sleeping in Chekov!” Uhura folded her arms across her slight protruding belly and flopped onto the edge of Kirk’s bed. “Even for you, that’s creepy.”
“Nyota…”
“I am not putting on some footie pajamas that look like Pavel Chekov!” She turned her back on the fuzzy gold sleeper that bore an uncanny resemblance to the young Russian.
“Pizhama Chekov,” he corrected without thinking.
This time, he didn’t even wait for the Death Glare. Without giving her another look, he walked round to the other side of the bed and began pulling off his boots. He grasped the hem of his tunic and pulled it over his head in one fluid motion. Her quiet gasp sounded just as he was tossing it onto the bedside chair.
“What happened?” he asked, craning his neck to check on her.
Pointing to his red, brown and black tank top, she asked shakily, “Why are you wearing that?”
Instead of answering, Kirk grinned again. Then he stood and yanked off his trousers.
Uhura turned away before they were halfway to the floor.
Jim settled onto the bed then patted the other side. “Come on,” he cajoled. “Lay down.” He didn’t even have to glance over at her to know she was staring at his feet.
Several silent moments passed before he felt the mattress shift. When she finally spoke, all traces of anger and outrage were missing from her voice. “Okay, Kirk. I get why you’re wearing the Socks and why you want me in the Chekovs. But what’s up with the Underoosas?”
He rolled his head to the side until he could meet her dark eyes. “I have to wear them. Spock said, ‘Take care of her, Jim’ and I said I would. I try not to break my promises to friends.”
Without another word, she leaned over, grabbed the footie jammies and walked into the bathroom. When she returned, looking like - he had to admit - and overgrown stuffed banana, she climbed into bed beside him and lay on her side. Tucking her hands under her cheek, she scooted back until he could wrap his arms around her.
__________
Spock didn’t scruple to use his override code when neither Jim nor Nyota responded to repeated chimes at the captain’s door.
Although the lights in Kirk’s quarters were at zero percent, he crossed the sitting room silently and entered the sleeping chamber without making a sound.
He was standing directly over his sleeping mate when Kirk’s disheveled head rose abruptly from her hair.
“Nothing hap-” he started to say, but Spock quickly shushed the human male.
Nyota murmured in her sleep as he gathered her in his arms and lifted her up. “Captain,” he whispered over her head, raising an eyebrow he knew Jim could not see, “not even you would attempt to seduce a pregnant woman who currently resembles a Terran tropical fruit.”
He turned and carried his precious burden away with him.
Just before he activated the door to the corridor, he heard Jim murmur, “He’d better hope she was really asleep when he said that.”
Read Chapter 3
Fandom: Star Trek: Reboot
Characters: Kirk, Uhura, Spock
A/N: This is the second chapter of the final of the four stories.
Warnings: pure crack; references to sexual situations
Disclaimer: I don't anything related to Star Trek, and I still haven't bought any new Underoos.
( Read Story One, Chap. 1 )
( Read Story One, Chap. 2 )
( Read Story One, Chap. 3 )
( Read Story Two, Chap. 1 )
( Read Story Two, Chap. 2 )
( Read Story Two, Chap. 3 )
( Read Story Three, Chap. 1 )
( Read Story Three, Chap. 2 )
( Read Story Three, Chap. 3 )
( Read Story Four, Chap. 1 )
Since his secret was out anyway, somehow it didn’t seem like a bad idea to start expanding his collection. While women’s underwear were unquestionably the luckiest, Kirk realized a similar benefit could be garnered from other articles of clothing.
_____
The first time Spock went on a dangerous away mission without her- well, all away missions were potentially dangerous; just look at what happened to them the time Spock pissed off a baby goddess with a lisp and an attitude problem.
The first time Spock went on an unquestionably dangerous away mission without her, Uhura ended up spending the night in Kirk’s quarters.
It wasn’t her choice. She wasn’t trying to sublimate her fear for her mate by having unbridled sex with her admittedly sexy superior officer. Uhura first stepped through Jim’s doors under doctor’s orders.
“I know you want to stay in your rooms, wallowing in grief even before those Artoorites do most of us a favor and kill your pointy-eared paramour. But that ain’t no good for you and it shore as hell ain’t good for the pointy-eared progeny you’re lugging around right now.”
Jim Kirk, Bones promised, could bore her so silly she’d be able to sleep through a photon torpedo attack. She hadn’t wanted to go. She didn’t see the wisdom of hanging out with the man who’d sent her Vulcan down to what could very well be his death with no one but Ensign Pavel Andreievich Chekov to watch his back. (Except that maybe there wouldn’t be anyone around to stop her from killing Kirk when the news came). The doctor just waved aside her worries - and threats - saying, “This ain’t a request, Gorgeous!”
When pulling rank didn’t work, Leonard McCoy wasn’t above playing woe-is-me and asking her if she wanted to be responsible for his broken arm when Spock found out he hadn’t made sure she’d accepted the best cure of pregnancy-related insomnia the Alpha Quadrant had to offer.
“That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard come out of your mouth,” she grumped instead of pointing out that she wouldn’t even be in this predicament if the damned contraceptives he’d prescribed for her and her husband had actually worked, damn it!
“But it’s working, idinit?”
He winked at her, the corner of his mouth lifting in a way that looked nothing like Spock’s half-smile. And even more appealing than Kirk’s half-lidded grin. She felt a shiver of… something tickle her in places she didn’t want to be tickled. At least, not by anyone who wasn’t named S’chn T’gai Spock.
Damned pregnancy hormones! Damned sexy crew
She let McCoy tuck her hand into the crook of his elbow, wondering which would kill her first: worrying about Spock? or resisting the forbidden fruits of the Enterprise?
“Kirk better be as boring as hell,” she warned the doctor.
__________
Jim Kirk knew damned well telling titillating stories of his conquests was unlikely to keep Uhura’s mind off her husband. He knew it when Spock’s grave voice had ordered - there was no question that it was an order - him to keep an eye on his wife. He knew it when Bones had comm’ed him, saying, “You gotta do something about that lovely lady.” And he knew it when he started making plans for that evening’s entertainment.
He just hadn’t known how wildly unsuccessful all of his efforts would turn out to be. It was like Uhura had morphed into a completely different woman the minute Spock had beamed down to the surface of Kamalut.
By the time she politely refused to continue their discussion about the newly-discovered sub-equatorial moon variant of Northern Hammurabian (despite rumors to the contrary, he hadn’t become treasurer of the Xenolinguistics club just because of the available eye-candy), he was fresh out of ideas and knew he was in trouble.
Before leaving, the Vulcan had warned, “Since the advent of her pregnancy, Lieutenant Uhura has occasionally proven to be something of a challenge.”
Jim’s sneaking suspicion that Spock got off on that challenge was confirmed when he’d smirked and asked, “Do I even want to know?”
Spock had replied with all appearance of seriousness. “Probably. I am almost certain you would want to know.” Then, he’d done something Jim had never seen him do before. Spock’s lips had tilted up just the slightest bit at the corners as he said almost dreamily, “But I am even more certain that I shall not explain.”
Kirk knew enough about the various effects of pregnancy hormones on the female body to guess what had his first officer damn-near grinning. Obviously, that kind of distraction was out- unless… no. If Uhura didn’t kill him for trying, Spock would. And Jim didn’t like the odds of him living long enough for Spock to end his misery quickly.
Babysitting his communications chief was almost as arduous as keeping her husband company was when she was the one off-ship.
“What do you say we just go to bed?”
Poor choice of words.
But the Infamous Uhura Death Glare wasn’t exactly unexpected, so he managed to grin through his exhaustion and exasperation.
“Seriously, Uhura, you need to sleep. And all this worrying can’t be good for the kid.”
“Being fatherless won’t be good for him, either!” she snapped. And then, just to make him feel even more like an ass, she started to cry. “I-I’m sorry, J-Jim,” she wailed, burying her face in her hands.
As he wrapped his arms around her, encouraging her to stand and walk towards the bedroom, Kirk made a mental note to have Bones quadruple check his store of birth control hypos. And to order some extra-strength condoms for himself.
__________
“I’m not sleeping in Chekov!” Uhura folded her arms across her slight protruding belly and flopped onto the edge of Kirk’s bed. “Even for you, that’s creepy.”
“Nyota…”
“I am not putting on some footie pajamas that look like Pavel Chekov!” She turned her back on the fuzzy gold sleeper that bore an uncanny resemblance to the young Russian.
“Pizhama Chekov,” he corrected without thinking.
This time, he didn’t even wait for the Death Glare. Without giving her another look, he walked round to the other side of the bed and began pulling off his boots. He grasped the hem of his tunic and pulled it over his head in one fluid motion. Her quiet gasp sounded just as he was tossing it onto the bedside chair.
“What happened?” he asked, craning his neck to check on her.
Pointing to his red, brown and black tank top, she asked shakily, “Why are you wearing that?”
Instead of answering, Kirk grinned again. Then he stood and yanked off his trousers.
Uhura turned away before they were halfway to the floor.
Jim settled onto the bed then patted the other side. “Come on,” he cajoled. “Lay down.” He didn’t even have to glance over at her to know she was staring at his feet.
Several silent moments passed before he felt the mattress shift. When she finally spoke, all traces of anger and outrage were missing from her voice. “Okay, Kirk. I get why you’re wearing the Socks and why you want me in the Chekovs. But what’s up with the Underoosas?”
He rolled his head to the side until he could meet her dark eyes. “I have to wear them. Spock said, ‘Take care of her, Jim’ and I said I would. I try not to break my promises to friends.”
Without another word, she leaned over, grabbed the footie jammies and walked into the bathroom. When she returned, looking like - he had to admit - and overgrown stuffed banana, she climbed into bed beside him and lay on her side. Tucking her hands under her cheek, she scooted back until he could wrap his arms around her.
__________
Spock didn’t scruple to use his override code when neither Jim nor Nyota responded to repeated chimes at the captain’s door.
Although the lights in Kirk’s quarters were at zero percent, he crossed the sitting room silently and entered the sleeping chamber without making a sound.
He was standing directly over his sleeping mate when Kirk’s disheveled head rose abruptly from her hair.
“Nothing hap-” he started to say, but Spock quickly shushed the human male.
Nyota murmured in her sleep as he gathered her in his arms and lifted her up. “Captain,” he whispered over her head, raising an eyebrow he knew Jim could not see, “not even you would attempt to seduce a pregnant woman who currently resembles a Terran tropical fruit.”
He turned and carried his precious burden away with him.
Just before he activated the door to the corridor, he heard Jim murmur, “He’d better hope she was really asleep when he said that.”
Read Chapter 3